Places Parallel

How to Destroy Angels Has Released a Video!

2010-05-16T19:12:00.026-05:00

First of all, you can watch "The Space in Between" in 1080p here.

Okay, let's discuss!

Okay, video is starting in a poorly lit hotel...kind of sounds like a slowed-down "Burn" so far, but I can go with it.

Someone has left the TV on, the water running, a cigarette burning...there's life with Mr. Maise right there.

HOLY SHIT...what has happened to our happy couple?!!!!

(click for larger size)

More monotone "singing." So I've figured out why I'm not really into HDA. It is the singing...NOT the fact that it's her and not really her voice, although no one is going to mistake her for Jennifer Hudson or anything. It's the fact that she's essentially singing Nine Inch Nails songs in a dull monotone. It might work if she were in Ladytron or something, but Trent's music is very strum und drang, emotional, cathartic. In one song, he can range from a whisper to a sexy growl to a rage-filled roar. I mean, let's face it...lyrics are not Trent's strong suit. Half the time, he's recycling lyrics from other songs. It's the WAY he sings it that draws me in. So that's why the monotone is not doing it for me at. all. Don't get me wrong--it's not a *bad* song. It's just kind of boring.

Anyhoo.

Meanwhile, Trent's not up to much in this video. "Don't pay me any mind...I'm just a corpse here...had nothing to do with the making of this song..."

And Mariqueen tries her best to be the SEXXXIEST possible dead person. Yuck.

Atticus does a good job at being sort of vaguely sinister:

But who the hell is this chatty blonde? Seriously? Who is this??

Well, it probably doesn't matter, since it's meant to be all David Lynch and mysterious, I guess. It's kind of a cool video, but it also sort of feels like something Marilyn Manson would do now that he's back together with Evan Rachel Wood. "We love each other so much we are BLOODY CORPSES!" Maybe this is all some allegory about Trent and MQ's feelings when they got into all those fights on Twitter.

About two minutes in, this production turns into an overserious remake of Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance"

But I have to admit that the effects are pretty cool.

But they should have done some movie magic on the gross feet in this video:

This band hasn't released their first EP, and there are clearly already some serious tensions within the group:

I would like to point out that when CSI Miami arrives, they're going to get the phone logs for this room, and Chatty Cathy's fingerprints are clearly on it. Horatio Caine would know just what to say.

So there you have it. Kinda cool video. Boring song. Thoughts?

Back to Work, I Guess!

2010-05-14T22:41:00.008-05:00

So we've got a lot of cobwebs to clear out and a lot of spam comments to delete, but what the hell? Trent never stops working, even when he puts himself on hiatus, so I guess we shouldn't throw in the towel either!

This is usually where I make apologies for playing FarmVille instead of writing more frequently and covering all the concerts I see, but we don't have time. There is a lot happening, and it is HILARIOUS.

First of all, there's this great new band out...have you heard of them? How to Destroy Angels--there's this really pretty lady named Mariqueen. She's the lead singer. We've got Atticus Ross; he...um, does all the things he normally does. And then there's this other guy...well, he's way off in the back and kind of blurry. He's probably not that important.

They've released a single. It's called "A Drowning," and is available on Amazon and Itunes and inside your favorite breakfast cereals. This is the cover of the single. Isn't that a nice-looking lady?

You can hear the song here.

Hmmm. You know...it sounds awfully familiar. And this logo...it kind of reminds me of this one band I listened to a lot not too long ago...like when they did some album called "The Trip" or "The Fall" or whatnot.

Hm.

Oh, for Christ's sake--JUST BECAUSE YOU'VE TURNED YOUR BACK TO THE CAMERA DOESN'T MEAN WE DON'T KNOW IT'S YOU, DUMB ASS!

Everything about this project just SCREAMS NIN--in CAPS LOCK, even; as dedicated NIN fans, we can't help but feel a little...cranky about it all. He closes up shop on Nine Inch Nails, and THIS is what he comes up with next? Something that looks and sounds EXACTLY like what he has been already doing for the past 20 years? What on earth is the point?

Look at the nice lady! Look at her! Love the nice lady! Love her now!!!!

Sigh.

Look, I've stuck with Trent through thick and thin, and I've stuck up for Mariqueen daring to marry the man, even though I really couldn't give a shit, and I have taken a LOT of verbal abuse for this from the haters. That's why I feel fully qualified to say "meh" to this entire project. If Trent is not going to give Mariqueen and Atticus their own voice (although hers is kind of bland and not so compelling...in "A Drowning" she seems to be doing a sort of Trent impression), I seriously do not see the point. This means that either he is afraid that his fans will be hostile to anything that sounds remotely new and different (which may be true, given the general idiocy of his fanbase). Or maybe he's so much of a control freak that he simply can't collaborate. Or maybe this is stuff that he was working on for NIN and shelved for whatever reason and decided to resurrect it now. (Hell, even Niggy Tardust featured some discarded music from The Fragile.) I don't know. What I do know is that for a NIN ripoff, it's not even particularly good NIN. There. I said it.

Strangely, Trent has said this:

"TR: As stated above, this EP is a very early phase of this project. Yes, it sounds more NIN-ish than I believe it will as we progress. To me, HTDA frees me from some of the constraints I've begun to feel (primarily emotionally) in NIN.

NIN is not dead and I am about to work on some material that I believe will be quite different than previous NIN very soon."

What? Why?? Why make NIN-ish music for How to Destroy Angels and then create music that sounds completely different for NIN? This makes no. sense.

At any rate, I'm still curious to see what HDA comes up with next. Because I'm sure it will be hilarious. Like their new video...which we shall tackle in another post.

Yours from the Other Side,
Maise

Trent Once Again Has Blown Up the Internet...

2010-02-10T12:24:00.002-06:00

With vague photographic evidence of some sort of musical work taking place. The news has not only resurrected me, but it has also crashed nin.com, so I won't be able to steal said photos for this post. I can describe them as pictures of some sort of synth-looking equipment and wires...the posts are entitled "?", which pretty well describes my reaction to them. However, we all know that when Trent gets coy, he's about to unveil something new to his hungry disciples.

Fortunately for us at Places Parallel, we have the "inside track," so we can inform you all that Trent and his wife are working on a single AND a video...we can't wait to hear their gothed-up cover of Paula Abdul's "Opposites Attract"!

Now, I know it seems a bit cheesy, but lyrically, I can understand why they relate so well to this song:

"I like it quiet
And I love to shout
But when we get together
It just all works out...

I take it easy
Baby I get obsessed...

Nothing in common but this trust
I'm like a minus, she's like a plus
One going up, one coming down
But we seem to land on common ground
When things go wrong we make corrections
To keep things moving in the right direction
Try to fight it but I'm telling you Jack
It's useless, Opposites Attract..."

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!

Part 2: Aaaaand, I'm Back!

2009-12-03T23:47:00.007-06:00

Bonus IM transcript from the other night:
(because it's fucking funny)

_________________________

Maise: Holy shit...they put up a signed, smashed NIN guitar for charity, and the current bid is $2500!

Iris: Whoa!

Maise: Oh barf, I think Aaron North signed this one.

Iris: Meh

Maise: It's kind of adorable how Trent draws the little NIN logo. Like, "Yeah, it's still an awesome logo."

Iris: lol. Can I just say I hate how he does it though.

I know you're in a rush TR, but would it kill you to make the box a proper rectangle? What's this rounded edges and random line shooting off?

Maise: LOL. It would be like if I tried to do it.

Iris: Well but after thousands and thousands of autographs I'd think he'd have it down by now.

Draw an L, draw another L. BAM! Rectangle.

But I suppose even that would be hard since he holds his autographing pens like he's got a monkey fist.

Maise: LOLOLOLOL! I didn't notice.

Iris: Did you ever see the video of him signing the first Ghosts package?

Maise: That's right. I'm really unobservant.

Iris: Not me man. I watched that a bunch of times. Like "aww...look at him signing MY copy!" ;)

Maise: LOLOLOLOL

Iris: I wish you had sound on your computer because that sigh he does as he reaches for the first book is just so loaded with meaning.

"-sigh- It's going to be a long fucking day."

Maise: Who taught him how to hold a pen?

He wasn't taught by nuns, I'll tell you that much. LOL

Iris: I'm telling you! MONKEY FIST!

Maise: What a weird way to hold a pen!

Iris: He holds it between his first finger and middle finger instead of first finger and thumb. Try writing anything like that. It feels so weird!

Maise: But vertically too.

Iris: And explains his penmanship so much.

Maise: I'm trying to recreate how he does this. He doesn't use his index finger at all. He writes with his thumb only. With the pen resting on the middle finger, I think.

That is WEIRD! The index finger curls around and doesn't do anything.It kind of does make you write like him a bit.

I don't know how he doesn't wind up with the marker all over his hand

Iris: lol. How many extra views did we just add to that video watching how he holds a pen?

Maise: No more than the girls who watch it in order to lick the screen.

Aaaaand, I'm Back!

2009-12-03T21:24:00.016-06:00

First off, no, I'm not dead. Just took a bit of extended leave. A girl's allowed a break every now and then. Hopefully this is the start of making my way back on here more regularly. I know I've still got a TON of videos and pictures to edit and a show review to write up, but I will get to them. Eventually.

Anyhow, what brings me out of the woodwork this evening, believe it or not, is Marilyn Manson. It started out innocently enough when Maise and I started talking about MM's recent revelation that he is dating Evan Rachel Wood again. And well it went downhill from there to the recent music video he released, but it was kind of funny so we decided to "live blog" it for our always patient readers.

__________________________________________________

Maise: OMFG! Marilyn Manson is claiming that he's back together with Evan Rachel Wood.

Iris: I saw that! WTF is she thinking?

Maise: She was rumored to be dating fucking TRUE BLOOD ERIC! How the fuck do you fuck that up and wind up back with Marilyn Manson?????

Iris: Or! (dunt-dunt-dunt!) Is he lying?

Maise: Perhaps. He is totally fucked in the head with drugs. I'm sure he lies all the time.

Iris: If she is back with him then she was probably all "...but he needs me. I can fix him."

Maise: And MM just made a video where he beats an Evan lookalike to death. Charming!

(Be warned. The end of the video is NSFW.)

Iris: Up to that point it's the most boring. video. ever. I heard about it and thought I'd check it out. I watched the first few minutes and I was like "okay...when's it happening, when's it happening?"

Maise: Yeah, I'm waiting to watch it now. [Note: Maise's computer has no sound currently]

You mean, that doesn't even happen in the beginning?

Iris: No, he doesn't really start getting her until the end. I skipped part of the middle though so she might appear earlier too.

Maise: Awwww, at 00:16, he's a sad, sad clown.

Wow, this is a boring ass video.

It's like 00:51, and he's just standing there.

Iris: Trust me. Even with music, it isn't much better.

Maise: Shockingly, he's kind of not super ugly in this. I mean, he's not good-looking by any means, but the makeup is a little more understated.

God, if I paused this video, it would be the same as watching it. 2:fucking 30, and he's still moping with the curtain.

Iris: You'll have to listen to it tomorrow at work. I don't know why he's constantly gotta have his vocals on wah-wah synth pitch.

Maise: LOL. Probably because he has a shitty singing voice.

Iris: Well if he really wants to shock me then he should do an acoustic number.

Maise: With no makeup.

Iris: Whoa...baby steps, man, baby steps.

Maise: An acoustic number wherein he finds Jesus after all these years.

Iris: LOL

Maise: Okay...You weren't kidding about this being the most boring video ever.

Iris: And there's 6 minutes of it.

Maise: Must have been pretty cheap to make, at least.

Oh, now we're sort of getting to the ERW part.

Iris: I'll bet it was self-shot in his bathroom with his shower curtain and some black candles in the background ala Chris Crocker style.

Maise: LOLOLOL! OMG, he totally looks like Chris Crocker in his sad clown scenes.

Now we're in horror movie vision.

What's with the tie?

Actually, wardrobe wise, I think that's a good look.

Iris: Yeah, I like the leather glove when he signs his slam book.

Maise: Ugh, who would allow themselves to be beaten to death by that sad little mime?

Iris: "Dear diary, Evan Rachel Wood has RUINED my life."

Maise: LOL. Well, this video is both boring AND grody, but it wasn't quite as explicitly violent as I was expecting. Wouldn't have me running back to date him, though.

"I'm sorry, Alexander Skarsgaard, I must leave your HOT ass to return to Marilyn Manson who makes videos about murdering me."

Can you believe he's got both Twiggy AND Vrenna working with him?

OMG, this interview! Manson broke up with Interscope, isn't that a surprise?

Iris: “Yeah, I think it will be more badass , I think it’s going to be more romantic maybe. Self abusive.”

Gawd!

Maise: Okay, the only ones who think cutting is shocking any more are Manson and sixth-grade girls.

By means of comparison...

Now that is how you do the sexxxy violence.

Iris: Okay, GAWD DAMN!!! That grin! That is badass! Not "I'm a sad clown posing with my shower curtain and oh yeah, I beat up my ex girlfriend."

Maise: Exactly.

God I LOVE his character SO MUCH! There is this scene in the second series where he says "trust me" to Sookie, and it is the hottest thing EVER said on film.

__________________________________________________

From there it just digressed further into the hotness that is Alexander Skarsgaard as Eric Northman. I'll spare you for now but I can't guarantee the same for the comments section.

Overdue Review of Saul Williams and the Afro-Punk Tour, 10/27/09

2009-11-23T14:05:00.005-06:00

Hello, friends! Thanksgiving approaches for those of us in the US, and I've got to say, it's a pretty awesome holiday. The main point of this holiday is to eat rich, homemade, slow-cooked comfort food made from recipes handed down from generation to generation and to eat in sufficient quantities so that you are too sleepy and contented to want to maim or kill your dysfunctional family. This year, Mr. Maise and I are hosting for the first time and will be roasting a dead turkey of our very own. In some ways, it will be nice not to have to cross state lines in order to get some lunch this Thursday, but it is also very intimidating and daunting, especially since we have approximately 5,000 hours of cleaning to do in our home in addition to all the food preparation.

So I figured it was definitely worth a look back at the Saul Williams show that Ro and I caught at the Double Door in October, especially since it was one of the strangest concert experiences I have had recently. I've got no audio-visual goodies for you for this one because that's normally Iris's area of expertise, plus venue security was being REALLY vigilant about cameras, so I wouldn't have gotten away with it anyway.

I will go to great lengths to see Saul Williams live. And when I say "great lengths," I mean staying out WAY too late on a weekday. I used to be quite the insomniac before I hit 30. Now I require a full 7-8 hours of sleep in order to feel remotely human the following morning. Yet when Saul performs in Chicago (with the exception of Lollapalooza), he tends to not take the stage earlier than 11:30 p.m. or midnight. By the time the show ends and I make it back to the 'burbs, it's usually around 1:30 or 2 in the morning, which means that I have to mainline caffeine to stay awake at my desk the following morning. (And I usually feel even MORE exhausted the morning after that, as my body tries to adjust to the violation of my circadian rhythms.) But Saul Williams is worth it. With his high energy level and his clear love for the music and the audience, he creates performances that always exhilarating and powerful and thought-provoking.

But this wasn't my favorite show of his, however.

He was headlining the Afro-Punk tour, which was playing at the Double Door, a lovely, intimate venue. Their audience was composed of 98% annoying white hipsters, which is an occupational hazard of performing in Wicker Park. Hollywood Holt performed first...he was a very entertaining rapper from Chicago, and I wish that he had had the more prominent set just before Saul Williams, as I much preferred him to American Fangs, which had a sort of generic rap/punk sound and seemed to be onstage for years.

Saul Williams appeared on stage around 11:00 or so in his typical warpaint and a turquoise-colored feather headdress. He opened the show with the same recitation of inspirational/revolutionary figures as he did at his Martyr's show back in 2008. This performance had a bit of a "been there, done that" feel to it, especially since he's not promoting a new album at this time. He played a lot of my favorites but didn't have as much energy as before, I thought. Maybe this particular tour is burning him out or he's getting bored with his first two albums, but the highlight of the show was clearly "Grippo," which he performed with his daughter Saturn, who appeared absolutely ecstatic to be onstage and to be up past her bedtime. He sang some of my favorites like "Black Stacey" and "Surrender (A Second to Think)" and "WTF" and "Skin of a Drum," but all I could think about, greedily, was what I was missing. Like "Sunday Bloody Sunday" and "Scared Money" and "NiggyTardust." He did play us a new song with much more intensity, and I was happy to hear that he's working on a new album.

I mean, don't get me wrong...even a "meh" Saul Williams performance is better than most other acts, but it's nothing compared to when he's at the top of his game. A perfect example is "Tr(n)igger," which was an absolute EXPLOSION at Martyr's but didn't have nearly the same urgency and joy at the Double Door.

Then the show just got bizarre. CX Kidtronik, Saul's DJ sidekick, took the stage with his solo rap act, Krak Attack, while Saul took an extended break. Krak Attack seems to be a very jovial act--playing with the irony of various cheesy hip-hop cliches. For example, Kidtronik and his bandmates brought the ladies up on stage to do some dancing during their set. I believe they had a song comparing the relative virtues of white girls and black girls...or was it skinny girls vs. big girls? I don't remember. The point is, while all this was going on for a good 20 minutes or so, all I could think was, "Et tu, Saul? What the hell is this opening act nonsense in the middle of the damn show?! It is midnight!!!" I probably would have more patience for Krak Attack if they had appeared after Hollywood Holt, but I did not have the patience for them at that point, as I pondered whether it would even be worth it to stick around for Saul's return. I was not the only one, as Krak Attack's impromptu performance caused a mass exodus. I decided to stick it out, thinking that perhaps Saul would make it up to us. When he finally did return, we got a lively rendition of "List of Demands." Then it appeared that there would be more...but there wasn't. Show over. Huh?

I must confess, therefore, that I was not the happiest of campers after this show ended. I felt a bit cheated--feeling that Saul hadn't been quite at 100 percent for whatever reason and then annoyed that he surrendered his stage to Kidtronik for an inordinate period of time. I would gladly lose more sleep over Saul Williams, but next time I hope he gives it his all.

Overdue Review of Adult Swim Metalocalypse Tour: Dethklok and Mastodon, October 17, 2009

2009-11-19T09:39:00.004-06:00

All righty, moving along with our overdue reviews. I'm working on Iris to do the Indigenous review because she knows a lot more about that band than I do. Come back, Iris!

So if you're familiar with Dethklok and Mastodon as well as opening bands High on Fire and Converge, you might be thinking, gee, Maise, that doesn't seem like your musical genre. You're right; it's not. I drag Mr. Maise to so many concerts and social events that every now and then I choose to do something that he would actually enjoy doing. Sometimes this means that I sit through Ozzfest in 118-degree heat or endure an evening of Godsmack. And he's been kind of going through a country music phase lately, so in comparison to some of the things he could drag me to, a Dethklok show is a piece of cake because I do enjoy the show Metalocalypse on Adult Swim. It's kind of a hard show to describe, but it involves the exploits of Dethklok, a metal band with endearingly stupid members. Somehow a sinister group of world leaders and religious figures fears the power that Dethklok has over its fans, so they always have some sort of plot to take down the oblivious members of this band. And their concerts are always extravagant, resulting in the gruesome deaths of audience members...like I said, it's kind of hard to explain, but here's the theme song and a little clip, just to give you an idea, if you haven't seen it before:

In one of my favorite little scenes, bass player Murderface encounters the "rock and roll clown," Dr. Rockso:

So obviously since this is an animated band, I was expecting something along the line of the Gorillaz. Animation playing on the screen to a live accompaniment. Since death metal isn't really my thing, as I explained above, I figured that at least I would have something to look at. I wasn't expecting to enjoy the show as much as I did. However, there were some opening acts to endure first.

The first act, High on Fire, was actually pretty good. I certainly didn't hate them. It's not necessarily something I'd listen to on my own, and it kind of felt like A Day in the Life of Dan Angel, but considering it was a metal opening band that I've never heard before, I felt pretty fortunate. Their songs had some melody, which is optional when you're dealing with the "cookie monster metal" bands. Here's a general example.

Next up was Converge. You probably wouldn't peg the members of this band as death metal types. They are short-haired and look a little like frat boys (except with more tattoos). The lead singer's vocal stylings sound EXACTLY like my male dog barking. EXACTLY. It's a lot of "WOOFWOOFWOOFWOOFWOOF!!!!!" Needless to say, the lyrics of their songs are completely unintelligible, and I started to get bored with them very quickly.

Mastodon was up next, and I must say I was pleasantly surprised. They sort of reminded me of Metallica, when Metallica was good. They played "Crack the Skye" for us, their concept album that is kind of about some guy in a coma and Rasputin. They had some cool imagery for us to look at...scenes that seemed to come out of an old B-movie, psychedelic pictures of Rasputin holding bears on leashes, interstellar travel, and other trippy stuff. But I could really only handle an hour of them. They played "Crack the Skye" all the way through, and then they started playing older stuff, I presume. But I needed to take a break in the lobby because I was starting to get antsy, and they were really LOUD. So loud. OMG. This concert had me feeling my age, that's for damn sure. I had forgotten ear plugs, which I normally don't have to wear at shows, but this was just way beyond my comfort level. I could have sworn that my ears were about to start bleeding at some point.

Here's a clip of Mastodon live, to give you the general idea:

With the surprisingly painless (well, except for my ears) opening bands out of the way, I was eagerly anticipating Dethklok. They opened, naturally, with the Dethklok theme. In this video, you can get a better look at the guys actually playing the music; they seem unlikely candidates for the creators of heavy metal:

Brendon Small, one of the series' creators, writes and performs all the music and does the voices for at least three of the Dethklok members. I have a hard time believing that the voice of Nathan Explosion, Dethklok's lead singer, comes out of his mouth. If you've ever seen Small's work on another animated series, "Home Movies," you'd probably find it even more surprising. He would occasionally banter with the crowd, using the different character voices. It always fascinates me to see a real live person talking in a famous cartoon voice...maybe that's just me.

They played a lot of songs from their first album, accompanied by videos, which were, like the show, grotesque and hilarious and kind of epic. I'll post a couple of my favorites here. These two had me laughing out loud while totally rocking out.

This one, in particular, is the perfect theme song for the health care debate. I'll post the lyrics below because I never have any idea what "Nathan" is saying:

Pull the plug
Pull the plug
Pull the plug
Pull the plug
Pull the plug
Pull the plug
Pull the plug
Pull the plug
Pull the plug

I drove my truck into a moving van
It was all filled up with jet fuel and
I crashed right in and explosion
Smash through the window and ripped off my hands

Medical team drove up and found me
Bleeding in pieces picked up off the street
Drove me into a filthy hospital
Horror experienced financially

Woke up in pain in a gown in bed
Internal hemorrhaging inside my head
I really think that I should be dead
I saw the bill and then I cry bled

To keep me alive it is costing me
National deficit times three
There is no way to avoid this fee
Please pull the plug and kill me

It's costing too much

Pull the plug plug

Aneurysm
Botulism
Epilepsy
Narcolepsy
Pull the plug

Nearsighted
Breath lighted
Cataracts
Heart attacks
Pull the plug

Hepatitis
Bronchitis
Appendicitis
Arthritis
Pull the plug

Encephalitis
Adenitus
Mastoiditus
Capsulitus

Pull the plug

Pay you my life instead of life support
Harvest my plasma because it's worth more
Take all my blood and my organs
Sell them to buyers over in third worlds

Burn my cadaver for some energy
Charge the patients in their misery
Such a strong quarter for the industry
Pharmaceutical fucking victory

Can't pay the price
Pull the plug
Pay with my life
Pull the plug
Say my farewell
Pull the plug
See you in hell
Fucking pull the plug

So. Fucking. Brilliant.

So although this was an evening I originally thought that I was going to tolerate at best, I had a great time. Mr. Maise enjoyed himself too, and it was actually something that he wanted to do, for a change. I'd highly recommend checking out Dethklok, primarily for the experience of the animation + live music. Plus, if you don't already watch Metalocalypse and think that might be your absurdist cup of tea, I'd recommend that as well. I'm kind of hooked now, myself.

Any pleasant surprises in your lives lately?

The Long Wave Goodbye--Overdue Review of NIN at the Aragon, 8/29/09

2009-11-12T14:30:00.005-06:00

So I have to admit, for what should be obvious reasons to regular readers, I've been dreading writing this review. Here are some things, in no particular order, that I'd rather do than write up this overdue review:

--Go back in time to 8th grade and play a game of volleyball with the bitchy popular girls and their mile-high bangs
--Have braces installed on my teeth and continually tightened for no good reason
--Go to Walmart at 4:30 a.m. the morning after Thanksgiving
--Drive a great distance with my husband while a scoreless baseball game is being announced on the radio
--Actually do the office work that has been assigned to me

Some of you may be wondering why I'm so hesitant to revisit this experience, which at the time was an enjoyable one. It's not that it's the last NIN show I'll be writing about for the foreseeable future. I've written thousands upon thousands of words with regard to Mr. Reznor and his bandmates. I'm more than ready to move on and discuss other things. I suppose if I say that it's because I'm not looking forward to all the malicious, psychotic bullshit that is sure to follow, then I guess the terrorists will win.

Trent was right, though...the haters do suck the fun out of everything, even if you try your best to ignore them. However, we here at Places Parallel will persevere. We will continue to keep up with Trent and his music, once he's finished with his hiatus, but we also have a LOT of other concerts to discuss, and what's more, I'd like to see more interaction from you, the sane reader, about what's interesting in music and what good shows you've seen. I assure you that I have no intentions of abandoning this site, and I plan to make good use of the "delete" button when necessary to ensure that this is a welcoming place for all.

August 29, 2009 was my ninth NIN show. I figured that if Trent really does put his old hits out to pasture and retire from touring, that would be a nice number to close out that period of my life. (I only wish it could have taken place on 9/9/09. Not even in LA did he do a 9/9/09 show. Lame!) I was accompanied by my dearest friends and favorite concertgoing companions, Ro, Iris, and Mr. Iris. The show took place at precisely the sort of intimate venue at which I have always wanted to see NIN: the Aragon Theater. He may very well have played his first Chicago show at the Aragon, or a place like it (the Metro, the Double Door, the Riviera, etc.). The Aragon has always had a special place in my heart as it is where I saw my very first rock concert in the big, bad city when I was a teenager (the Violent Femmes). When you're young and hemmed in by curfews and rules and small allowances, a real honest-to-God dingy, urban concert hall--poorly lit and with sticky floors--represents danger and real freedom. You feel the tension build before the show even starts in this hot, crowded place with all these strange people. You're slightly nervous that you're going to lose your friends; some creepy guy offers you a beer, and you refuse. You cling to your $20 bill tightly. It's all the money you've got, and you're trying to decide which t-shirt to buy. I can still feel that electricity in the air when I see shows at the Aragon; maybe I steal the spark from all the young kids in the crowd. At any rate, it was the perfect place for a dedicated fan like me to see her favorite band.

I've written so much about the experience of seeing NIN live that it's hard to know what else there is left to say. Regular readers know that the music means a lot to me personally. That's probably true for most NIN fans. The music taps into emotions that can be difficult to express our daily lives--rage, lust, despair--but these emotions must be given voice sometimes, or a person can just lose it. The lyrics are confessional, yet it's easy for the rest of us to project our own feelings and experiences upon them. I could tell you how each and every song on "With Teeth" is about my personal problems circa 2005--forget all that stuff about some guy named Trent and rehab. I went to every show possible so that I could experience a sense of release and a sense of communion with the hundreds or thousands of people around me--all of us shouting out the same words that are so difficult to say at work, to our lovers, to our parents, to our friends, to ourselves. I could tell from the angry, impatient, excited buzz in the air that the audience of this show was hungry for that release.

Experimental indie Danish (more Scandinavians!) rock band Mew was the opener. I can't remember a lot about their set, other than the fact that their songs were accompanied by unsettling imagery. Their music was pleasant enough to listen to; I think they are often compared to Muse by people in the know. But the hungry, angry crowd was not to be satiated by them; plus, it was at this point in the show when we first encountered "Richard" and his unfortunate wife/girlfriend/date, "Amy." Richard was extremely intoxicated and was well on his way to becoming even more intoxicated. He had been at the show the night before; he wanted to make sure that everyone in the venue knew that. You're aware of that, right? Good. He seemed like a fairly knowledgeable fan in his early- to mid-30s, and perhaps if his blood-alcohol level were somewhere below 0.3, he would have been okay to talk to. We stayed in Richard and Amy's vicinity because it provided Iris with a central view of the stage for her video-recording, but we were soon to regret it.

Finally...the moment we've all been waiting for! NIN took the stage beginning with "Home," which is kind of a "meh" opening. They probably could have skipped it and gone straight to "The Beginning of the End," which would have been appropo.

The setlist, courtesy of Echoing the Sound:

Home
The Beginning of the End
Survivalism
Heresy
March of the Pigs
Piggy
Metal
Ruiner
I'm Afraid of Americans
Burn
Gave Up
La Mer
The Frail
I Do Not Want This
Gone, Still
Right Where it Belongs (v2)
The Way Out is Through
Wish
Mr. Self Destruct
Suck
Echoplex
The Good Soldier
Dead Souls
Reptile(w/ Peter Murphy)
Strange Kind of Love (with Peter Murphy)
Final Solution (with Peter Murphy)
The Hand That Feeds
Head Like a Hole
Hurt

As you can see, it was very heavy on "The Downward Spiral"--no complaints from me on that! It would have been cool had he chosen to do some kind of concept, like "Pretty Hate Machine" from beginning to end, but this was a nice mix of his work spanning his entire career. It wasn't too different from what I have heard at previous NIN shows, but I was particularly happy to hear "I'm Afraid of Americans," "Dead Souls," (which poor Ro had been waiting to hear live for the first time for like seven shows), and "Gone, Still" from "Still," which I've never heard live before. I'm going to be honest and admit that I didn't miss the obligatory "Ghost" instrumentals. Those never felt quite as powerful as, say, "La Mer" or "Just Like You Imagined."

One moment that was especially powerful to me was "Ruiner." I think it may have been the first time that I heard this song live, but what struck me this time was chanting the words, "You didn't hurt me, nothing can hurt me, you didn't hurt me, nothing can stop me now." I know, I know, it's Trent's oft-recycled "nothing can stop me!" But I happened to reflect on everything I've overcome in the past and personal problems I'm dealing with now, and it helps to be reminded that there is a rock-solid part of me that cannot be touched by these things, that will never be defeated. It kind of has nothing to do with the song, but it's an example of how we can take away different things from the music than perhaps what was originally intended.

So as you see, Peter Murphy was the special guest, as promised. Which was awesome. We have seen Peter and Trent collaborate onstage with these very songs in the past, however, when NIN toured with Bauhaus, so there was kind of a "been there, done that" feel to this portion of the show, although I am always happy to hear "Strange Kind of Love." Perhaps this could have been avoided by bringing Peter to back up Trent for different songs or by begging and pleading with Gary Numan to come to Chicago. I'm really jealous of the LA crowd getting to see that! Also, it would have been awesome if Trent could have brought on some local legend, like uh...I dunno. Cheap Trick? Just kidding! But seriously...I don't know whom Trent has totally pissed off over the years, but Chicago has brought the world Veruca Salt, Liz Phair, Ministry (yes, yes, I KNOW Al hates Trent), Local H, and of course, The Smashing Pumpkins, although the total weight of the egos of Trent Reznor and Billy Corgan on one stage would probably cause a tear in the time-space continuum and end all life as we know it. Any of those would have been mind-blowing. Seeing Peter Murphy is always welcome...just not mind-blowing.

Trent had a nice spoken interlude wherein he thanked all of his fans and talked about how much he loves Chicago. It was very heartfelt and sweet, and I can't remember a word of it, so we just have to wait until Iris returns with the video of his speech. Come back, Iris!

Meanwhile, during all of these proceedings, Richard managed to make an enemy of every single person around him--from the man whom he spilled a beer on, to me and Iris because he was standing in front of my 4'10" self and talking loudly to the embarrassed Amy throughout the ENTIRE show, to Mr. Iris because he had no respect for anyone around him, to the guy who just finally snapped at the end of the show and shouted, "You were here last night? Good for you! The rest of us weren't, and we'd like to experience the show! SHUT THE FUCK UP!" He managed to commit every possible concert foul, and it's amazing that he didn't get involved in a fistfight. With his nonstop drunken chatter, it was hard for me to get in my zone during the show, so that was unfortunate. It was also unfortunate that so many of us had to waste so much time and energy being pissed off at him rather than enjoying the show. He really detracted from the entire experience. So let this be a lesson to all concertgoers...you can pre-party, just don't overdo it! And to all enabling girlfriends/wives, please remove your drunken man from an area before someone punches him in the fucking mouth, as he clearly deserved. So that was kind of a sour note on a great evening, but it can't be helped. As we have all learned recently, a lot of NIN "fans" are total assholes.

And that, I think, is that! *sigh...you know, it was actually kind of cathartic getting through this. I think I'm enjoying catching up on all my overdue reviews as opposed to having that nagging voice running through my brain: "You're ignoring Places Parallel...you're ignoring Places Parallel..."

Stay tuned, more reviews to come!

And Finally--the Long-Awaited Conclusion to Lolla-freaking-palooza 2009!

2009-11-11T10:30:00.001-06:00

Is it November already? Must be time for another post! As I've said countless times, I just want to keep the promises I made to you guys months and months ago, and then hopefully we can all move on and maintain a more regular publishing schedule, etc. Oh my God, when I get through this last Lolla review, I will feel SO relieved! At least I've gotten this written before Lollapalooza 2010!

My husband was eager to get to Grant Park somewhat early that last day to see Cage the Elephant, who have since become much more ubiquitous on the radio and in commercials than they were earlier this summer. They do happen to have the most interesting backstory of any act at Lollapalooza last summer (paraphrased from Lolla marketing). Apparently, the band was founded by two brothers--Matt and Brad Schultz--from Kentucky whose parents were former hippies turned Jesus freaks and lived on a Christian commune. Rock music was forbidden, until their parents were divorced, and then they immersed themselves in all kinds of good stuff like classic rock and grunge. Just like all those kids whose minds were blown by the first Velvet Underground record and had to create their own band, the Brothers Schultz grabbed some friends and made their own record in like 10 days and became a big success in the UK before anyone had ever heard of them here. By now you've probably heard the infectious "Ain't No Rest for the Wicked" and perhaps even "Back Against the Wall." They were brand-new to me that day, but I noticed that Cage the Elephant brought good old-fashioned blues-inspired rock to an enthusiastic crowd on a very hot day indeed. The first band I think of when I hear them is the Rolling Stones; they have a classic sound with something raw, sexy, and a little dangerous lurking in the lead singer's voice. After all, we all know what happens to the kids with super-religious, strict parents once those kids get a taste of freedom...unbridled, awesome hedonism! There's also a purity in their garage band sound, reminiscent of the White Stripes before they got all pretentious and discordant with the godawful "Icky Thump." As I recall, their live show was energetic, but it was hard to dance and "whoo" at 100 percent when we all just felt like passing out from the heat. (Paramedics with stretchers passed us at one point to rescue an overheated floozy in a sundress.) I'd definitely recommend catching one of their live shows if you get the chance. I think they were back in Chicago this past weekend, but I was too busy paying tribute to the Angelcat in Los Angeles at the time.

We managed to catch the latter half of the The Airborne Toxic Event's set, as they overlapped with Cage the Elephant, and Mr. Maise was definitely more interested in seeing CTE. We did manage to see TATE's big hit "Somewhere Around Midnight," which always makes me feel melancholy when I hear it because I never have anyone drunkenly chasing me around after glimpsing me at a bar because he's THAT in love with me. I mean, my husband loves me, but he's home and we eat dinner and fall asleep on the couch together...so it's just not the same! "Somewhere Around Midnight" was probably the big highlight of this abbreviated set for us, as I'm otherwise not terribly familiar with this band. I was also a little distracted because it was at this point that my husband disappeared for 15 minutes to get a beer and Ro and Iris disappeared for 20 minutes to re-fill their water bottles. It's sometimes hard to wrangle a whole group at these large outdoor festivals.

Okay, so I admit that I don't know the first thing about Neko Case other than the fact that she is a fellow admirer of greyhounds. She was also playing on the side of the park where we eventually wanted to end up at the end of the night, so we decided to establish a "base camp" of blankets and Neat Sheets on the west side of the park by the Budweiser stage in a shady area that was near (but not *too* near) the port-a-potties and a bar. It was really the perfect location for our group. Those who were tired and hot could lie back on the blankets and absorb the music. If someone wanted to get some food or drinks or take a closer look at the band, the rest of us were easy to locate. Iris and I did leave for a while to get a better look at Neko Case and her lovely fiery red hair. She kind of reminded me of Tori Amos, with a gentler sound that seemed more inspired by country and folk music (although I guess she's also a member of the New Pornographers, so she can do indie rock as well). She genuinely seemed to be having a good time on stage with her bandmates and interacted warmly with the audience. She's just a little too mellow for me, but I appreciated her as an artist, and I can see why her fans are so devoted to her. And any friend of retired racing greyhounds is a friend of mine!

We sort of half-listened to the next act, Dan Auerbach, and I must admit that I was pleasantly surprised. After all, if you see a guy who looks like this onstage in 2009, you might suspect that you'll be hearing something like Bon Iver...slow, acoustic, ballads about isolation and heartbreak. Dan Auerbach. But as I recall, his music was uptempo and blues-influenced. I really can't tell you anything substantial about Dan Auerbach unless I plagiarized Wikipedia or some such, so I'll just tell you about the human drama that we witnessed at this time. Ro noticed that a large number of people were jumping the fence to get into Grant Park. If they weren't jumping the fence, they were leaping over the row of port-a-potties. Which, frankly, was alarming to me. No one loves hanging out in those little blue outhouses, but could you imagine if you were in there, and someone came crashing down on top of you because he/she misjudged how far he/she had to jump? Horrifying! My favorite port-a-potty leaper was a guy who made the jump, then starting running immediately as he hit the ground, but simultaneously attempted to disguise himself by ripping off his shirt and his glasses. You know, like Clark Kent. Sort of. He assumed that no one could possibly recognize him as an unticketed individual, as we all laughed loudly and pointed.

Anyway, once these people crashed Lolla, as it were, they would then all take off running towards the field in front of the Budweiser stage. But Ro noticed that a couple of guys who were working at the bar would stop these individuals, lead them back to the port-a-potties, and then the gate-crashers would go inside and calmly walk out and be on their way. Then the guys working at the bar would go inside the port-a-potties, presumably to collect the bribes that had been left for them there. They probably made quite a bit of money! We noticed that occasionally they would have discussions with these gate-crashers and then lead said jumpers to an ATM so that they could procure the cash needed for the bribe. These two enterprising men did have a little competition as police were also on the lookout for fence-jumpers, and if the police caught them, they would wind up in handcuffs and (if they were lucky) merely escorted out of the park or perhaps arrested. So my recommendation to you, dear readers, is to a) just pay for the ticket to avoid looking like a chump and b) if you do want to crash, then have some extra cash on you for bribery or bail-posting purposes.

After Dan Auerbach, Lou Reed was scheduled to play. This particular slot of time was the most agonizing decision for me of Lollapalooza 2009. It was Snoop Dogg vs. Lou Reed, and they were at opposite ends of Grant Park, so it was impossible to see both. On the one hand, you have a rap icon who has pretty much become a pop culture punchline and who isn't terribly relevant in the world of hip-hop but who would be a hell of a lot of fun to see. On the other hand, you have a rock icon who is apt to be temperamental and who would probably avoid playing all your favorite songs just to be spiteful. We decided to go with Lou Reed, to see a legend in the flesh and in the hopes that he would play "A Perfect Day" Looking back, I feel that this was probably a mistake. First of all, he came onstage probably about 15-20 minutes late, which caused all kinds of chaos later in the night, as I shall explain. His setlist was all right, I suppose...I'm only the most casual Lou Reed fan, so I wasn't expecting to know every song by heart. We did get "Sweet Jane," "Waiting for the Man," and "Walk on the Wild Side." Lou seemed to be having a good time on stage but didn't really interact with the audience. That may be par for the course with him. So it wasn't a bad show, but I probably would have had much more fun singing along to "Gin and Juice" with all the other white hipsters in the crowd.

Lou Reed's tardiness meant that the next band, indie darlings Band of Horses, wound up starting about 15-20 minutes late. I don't have a ton to say about them except that, like Animal Collective, they chose to continue their set well after Jane's Addiction began. I realize that it wasn't their fault that they had to start late, but they knew they were going on right before the final headlining act of the festival--and not just any ol' headliner, like Kings of Leon, but the original lineup of Jane's Addiction. Now, while Jane's Addiction isn't exactly tapping into the rock zeitgeist as they once did, I feel that they deserve a modicum of respect for inventing the very concept of Lollapalooza. When Jane's Addiction came on, starting with "Up the Beach" and leading to my favorite "Mountain Song," I couldn't even hear it from all the sound being generated by Band of Horses on the other side of the field. And I want to say that they continued until 10-15 minutes into Jane's Addiction's set, even though Jane's Addiction delayed their entrance about 10-15 minutes. What a clusterfuck! Therefore, I propose again that no matter what the circumstances, festival organizers pull the plug on bands at their scheduled ending times. Because I don't care how great the end of someone's set is, it's usually not worth ruining the beginning of someone else's act.

And FINALLY, we come to Jane's Addiction. When Jane's Addiction were at the forefront of the alternative music scene, I was a mere impoverished teenager and had no pocket money to attend any of their shows. When Jane's Addiction was touring with NIN last spring, they did not appear at the Chicago show, probably because they had signed on to headline Lollapalooza. So this was my first (and possibly last) opportunity to see the original lineup of Jane's Addiction. Although it was ever so slightly anticlimactic, as I had seen Perry Farrell and various backing bands several times in the past, and he was always eager to play all the old Jane's Addiction hits. So there wasn't really a sense of "omg omg omg, I've finally heard 'Stop' live!!!"

When their set opened (annoyingly drowned out by Band of Horses, of course), they played "Up the Beach" as a helicopter flew low overhead and shined a spotlight on the crowd. Very dramatic and over the top, but also kind of awesome. I noticed people aiming their laser pointers at the helicopter. Smart move, assholes! I thought as I waited for the pilot to be blinded and crash into the crowd below.

Here is the setlist, courtesy of lollapalooza.com:

1. Up the Beach (w/ helicopter entrance)
2. Mountain Song
3. Ain't No Right
4. Three Days
5. Whores
6. Been Caught Stealing
7. Then She Did
8. Ocean Size
9. Ted, Just Admit It
10. Summertime Rolls
11. Stop!
(encore)
12. Jane Says (w/ Joe Perry)

Hmm...let's see, what do I remember about the show? Good production value, Perry's weird, yet strangely literal segues into songs...I'm pretty sure at one point he called us all "sluts" before beginning "Whores," for example. At one point the first few rows of the audience were given huge lengths of fabric to wave over their heads in order to simulate an ocean--presumably for "Ocean Size" because like I said, Perry can be awfully literal in his interpretation of song titles--and Perry ran in front of the crowd like the happiest dork, pretending to swim and dive. At one point Perry pointed out that their drummer, Stephen Perkins, was performing for us against doctor's orders, and thank God too, as it would have been a real bummer to lose both Jane's and the Beasties as Lolla headliners. As you can see in the setlist above, Joe Perry showed up for a special guest appearance. At the time, Steven Tyler had just fallen off a stage in South Dakota, so Aerosmith didn't have much to do with themselves. So Joe Perry helped out with "Jane Says." Perry asked the crowd if they wanted to see Aerosmith at Lollapalooza next year. Well, of course not, but no one wants to be rude to Joe Perry, so everyone cheered in the affirmative. Anyway, it might not be much of an issue if rumors of Aerosmith's inner turmoil are true. And then a very lucky Jane's Addiction fan was allowed to propose to his girlfriend onstage, and she said yes! (Not that there was any pressure on her or anything). And that's about all I have to say about that. Like I said, it felt a little redundant after all the other times I've seen Perry perform at Lollapalooza, but it was nice to see the original lineup of Jane's Addiction play together again, and they were in fine form, as you can see here.

And so that is FINALLY that. Once again, my apologies for all the long delays; real life occasionally gets in the way of my ghost life, but there is more to come!

Oh, and in all your comments, even the mean ones, I think you should include the sentence "Iris, come back!!!!" She's not dead or anything, but it sure isn't the same without her around here...

Long Overdue Lollapallooza Review--Day 2

2009-10-19T12:00:00.000-05:00

Okay, so this is so overdue, it's basically irrelevant, but basically, I need to clear my conscience of these missing reviews before I move on to cool new things like Saul Williams on October 27th! Thank God for schedules and setlists posted online because Christ knows I wouldn't remember any of this off the top of my head...

So let's take a look back at Day 2 of Lollapalooza, shall we? The lineup that day was kind of "meh," compared to Day 1, especially because the Beastie Boys were forced to cancel and were replaced as the headliner by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs. (To which we said, "No no no.") So there will likely be less rhapsodizing in this recap, but I shall do my best.

On Day 2, we replaced the constant rain with blistering heat and dehyradation. At least we knew it was coming. The weatherman was predicting inferno-like conditions for that Saturday and Sunday. In fact, as I positively shivered with cold during Depeche Mode, due to being drenched for hours and cooler temperatures, I reminded myself that the following two days, I would surely miss the rain and wind. Paramedics seemed busy with those who do not understand the dehydrating effects of alcohol on the human body, but for the most part, I must say the crowd seemed slightly better behaved than in years past. We encountered much less unconsciousness, vomiting and oblivious nudity this year, and since I'm not 19 years old, I certainly didn't miss it.

We were able to catch the end of thenewno2's set, and it was unfortunate that we couldn't have seen more, but they had a super-early set beginning at noon, and we were exhausted from the night before and traffic, yadda yadda. Hey, if a professional publication wants to pay us so we could stay in a nearby hotel in order to provide a fuller, more detailed review, we won't say no! Anyway, as you may already know, thenewno2 (a reference to the British TV show "The Prisoner," I am told) is led by George Harrison's hottie son, Dhani. Dhani may look and sound exactly like his father, but that doesn't mean that you'll be seeing a Beatles cover band. You'll hear the '60s British invasion blues-y influences in his music, but who *isn't* influenced by the Beatles, let alone actual progeny of the Beatles? But there's also a significant nod to Massive Attack and a certain cool, electronica sound. I think we came in somewhere around "Out of Mind" and we stuck with them til the end of their last song, "Choose What You're Watching." But we definitely liked what we heard, and the good news is that we will be seeing thenewno2 once again when they open for Wolfmother on November 13th. (Note: I have absolutely no interest in Wolfmother, so here's hoping we get to the show on time!)

Here's thenewno2 singing "Choose What You're Watching." Don't you just want to chase Dhani in a madcap manner around the streets of London with a group of screaming girls? Maybe that's just me...

We had some free time after thenewno2, so we had the opportunity to experience some new bands. Iris was particularly taken with Dirty Sweet, a bluesy rock band from San Diego whose members do not appear to wash their long, greasy hair. Ever. Still, they were a great band for an outdoor festival on a hot summer day. They've got a sort of a Southern classic rock sound. The vocals are very reminiscent of Chris Robinson of the Black Crowes, and there's even a touch of the Pete Townshend to be found in the guitar riffs of this song, "Baby Come Home."

Dirty Sweet would be, in my opinion, the perfect band for a dive bar at midnight. Not that that is the only venue where they belong; they would just really fit the atmosphere.

After Dirty Sweet, we sat for a while in the makeshift beer garden, watching the technophiles dancing to the stylings of DJs Moneypenney and then Kaskade. You know, the usual "oonce oonce oonce." Although I don't understand who could dance around in a huge crowd in that heat. We took the opportunity to pow-wow about who we would see next. No one had any burning desires, so I suggested Ida Maria. There was quite the Scandinavian invasion this year with Peter Bjorn and John, Ida Maria, and Lykke Li, so I wanted to get in on the Lingonberry Revolution if that's going to be the huge new thing. Then I could say that I coined the term "Lingonberry Revolution," for one thing.

I like to think of Ida Maria as Norway's answer to Blondie. She's got a garage band sound with sweet, slightly accented vocals, as exemplified in this song, "Louie."

It's kind of like if Bjork actually sang rock songs, as opposed to her usual artistic yodeling. (And don't get me wrong--I love Bjork.) Apparently she had a bit of a wardrobe malfunction (her dress popped open, exposing a pink bra), and she doused herself with water while twirling and singing songs like, "I Like You So Much Better When You're Naked."

So it was an enjoyable way to spend 45 minutes, especially when you're listening to a brand new band for the first time. In order to catch Care Bears on Fire, we left as she sang a rousing cover of the Stooges, "I Wanna Be Your Dog."

Wow, man, Care Bears on Fire. Despite the fact that the band members have just started high school (Jena, the oldest member, is now in 10th grade) and were playing the "Kidzapalooza" stage, we were intrigued by the hilariously violent imagery suggested by their band name and wanted to check them out. They have a cute, kid-friendly and very catchy punk sound, but these girls are also rather terrifying. When bantering with the "Kidzapalooza" emcee, they kind of sounded like Dakota Fanning giving an interview--you know, just professional beyond their years. Indeed, they already have two full-length albums, a record deal, television appearances, a Lollapalooza gig, and have collaborated with Adam Schlesinger from The Fountains of Wayne. One of the members complained onstage about the microphone volume with just the right amount of rock star petulance. These are girls who most likely know what label of bottled water they prefer and precisely what temperature it should be at. If you suffer from any kind of self-doubt, ennui, or a sense that life hasn't really gone the way you've planned, by all means, avoid Care Bears on Fire. On the other hand, their punk cover of "Everybody Wants to Rule the World" by Tears for Fears was kinda brilliant. Totally calculated and contrived, but brilliant nonetheless. I mean, they're just teenage girls and should by all means be encouraged to rock, but they are also extremely intimidating. I'm just saying.

We headed over to the Chicago 2016 (a lost cause...alas!) stage to stake out a spot on the hill, as we would eventually be watching Tool later that evening. It was just really hot and exhausting this year...we didn't have the stamina to cross Grant Park multiple times to catch individual acts, like the Arctic Monkeys or TV on the Radio, so we settled for what was around us.

God, Coheed and Cambria. They seem to be at Lollapalooza just about every year. They've got a throwback classic hard rock sound reminiscent of Rush or Dio. Personally, I prefer Tenacious D, but Coheed and Cambria does have a lot of very loyal fans. They're just not my genre *at all*. Their set seemed to last years. Years! I lay back on our Neat Sheet and closed my eyes and tried to endure.

Next, there was no way in hell I was going to sit through Rise Against, so I took a chance on Lykke Li, and this was probably the most pleasant surprise of the entire day. A member of the "Lingonberry Revolution" (remember...it was coined here first, folks!), the Swedish singer is an adorable blonde with a high voice reminiscent of anime characters who does dancey-pop songs with an otherworldly indie sensibility. If it sounds a little like Peter Bjorn and John to you, that's probably because her debut album "Youth Novels" was produced by PB&J's Bjorn Yttling. I feel kind of bad calling her "adorable," but oh my God, just look at her! Plus, isn't this the best song you've ever heard?

"Youth Novels" is a worthwhile investment, and I felt bad being so behind the curve...her many enthusiastic fans knew all the words to every song, and here I was listening to her just for the first time.

Animal Collective was next, and I guess to appreciate/understand them, you have to be the kind of person who writes for Pitchfork. All I know is that this artsy group from Baltimore with weird stage names like "Panda Bear" and "The Geologist" was the absolute worst act I've ever been subjected to at Lollapalooza, bar none. I'm not very motivated to check out their albums, but I know that their setlist involved making the same screechy noise repeatedly for like an hour and 10 minutes straight. And the worst part? Their set went over egregiously, to the point where they were drowning out Tool. This was a big problem at this year's Lollapalooza...when bands reach the end of their scheduled time, someone needs to pull the plug because there's a BIG problem with acoustics when the stages are right across from each other. It's really disrespectful to other bands and their fans. I mean, honestly, did we really need an extra 10 minutes of "Screeeeech, beep, Screeeech, beep, Screeech!!!"? Ugh!

And finally, we get to the headliner of day 2: Tool. I'm really not the most qualified person to review them because I've never had much interest in them, to be honest. They were definitely more appealing than the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, but if the Beastie Boys hadn't been forced to cancel, I would be reviewing them instead, for sure. It's not that I'm particularly opposed to their style of music or Maynard's singing voice...although I find their songs sort of monotone and indistinguishable from each other and the lyrics undecipherable. They did have a very impressive stage show with their dark and slightly disturbing videos. And apparently, Iris got some good pics of Maynard basically stripping down to his skivvies gradually during the show (it's hot up there with the stage lights!), but I was unaware of any onstage antics because we were sitting off to the side up on a hill, so I could really only get a good look at the screens displaying the videos.

This is their setlist, according to Lollapalooza's website, if you're curious:

1. Jambi
2. Stinkfist
3. Forty-Six & Two
4. Schism
5. Rosetta Stoned
6. Flood
7. Ænema
8. Lateralus
9. Vicarious

Wow, their songs must be really long! My husband informs me that these are their more recent works and not from the earlier albums that he used to subject me to when we would drive back and forth from our hometown to college.

Sorry about this non-review of Tool...they're really not my thing. If our long-lost Iris ever returns to us, hopefully she can give you a much more thorough look back at this show!

Oh, but the best part of the entire show! We witnessed an EXTREMELY drunk woman dragging an EXTREMELY drunk male companion up the hill. She had a death grip on his arm, and he was stumbling trying to keep up with her. They were so drunk that everything they did appeared to be in slow motion. He apparently did not enjoy being dragged like a mule, so he grabbed her by the ponytail. This enraged her, so she kicked him square in the balls, then dragged him away. All this was accomplished, as I said, very slowly and with no words whatsoever. Although I was momentarily afraid that they were going to puke and/or fall on me, it really was the most amazing piece of theater I've ever witnessed.

And that, my friends, was Day 2. Hopefully this week I can finish off Lollapalooza 2009, the bane of my existence, and then we can MOVE ON. However, I am going to warn you that I think I'm catching the swine flu.

Can I Come Out of Hiding?

2009-10-12T10:46:00.004-05:00

Okay, I'm SO guilt-ridden for not delivering on various concert reviews and not having enough time to post anything else (I really have been a miserable ghost bitch all month) that I've been actively avoiding this place, and that's just silly because a) I'm the cofounder of this freaking blog and b) I love you all, especially because we've been too boring for the Trolls lately.

So I'm just going to put up something quick til I can deal with all the shit that's been haunting me for MONTHS now, and I just want to let you know that my concert-going days are not over! I've got Dethklok this Saturday (definitely not my genre, but I do enjoy "Metalocalypse" on Adult Swim). Then on October 27th, Iris and Ro and I will be enjoying Saul Williams once again at a lovely intimate venue called the Double Door. Then on November 13th, Ro and I will be seeing Dhani Harrison's band, thenewno2, again (oh yeah, that's right...we saw them once at Lollapalooza, which I have yet to review...sigh), but crazy-haired Wolfmother will actually be the headliner at that show.

Anyway, I just wanted to report to you on my musical guilty pleasures because I've really been indulging them lately. Instead of my usual gothy moodiness, I've been turning to the most ridiculous pop music to motivate myself to work out and drive to the office without attempting suicide on the way and to generally crack myself up with all of these songs about "the dance floor." Dudes, I am never in clubs or on dance floors in my 30s, but apparently, I'm missing a LOT.

(gag reflex alert: Chris Brown is featured on this otherwise kick-ass song)

Okay, so she never wears pants, and she kind of looks like Marilyn Manson from some angles, but I've got to admit, I officially like Lady Gaga. She's not half as avant-garde as she thinks, or maybe she doesn't even really think she's avant-garde, but I do appreciate her humor and self-deprecation and shameless pop hooks. This video really won me over with its wacked-out medical couture and uh...a starring role by Alexander Skarsgard. The Minnie Mouse outfit at the end kind of has to be seen to be believed.

Finally, in my guilty pleasures du jour, is this, "Crazy Possessive" by Kaci Battaglia. The first time I heard this chorus, I laughed out loud. Plus, Kaci totally has a "Real Housewives of New Jersey" thing going on, so it's all priceless:

So yeah, this is what happens when Trent "retires." Places Parallel collects dust, and I start singing along to Flo Rida.

Rest in Peace, Patrick Swayze...

2009-09-16T09:47:00.005-05:00

Hey everyone, sad celebrity news. I'm sure you've all heard it by now, but Patrick Swayze passed away after a battle with pancreatic cancer. From all accounts, he was a super-nice guy, so let's relive our junior high days and have a Patrick Swayze retrospective, shall we?

(That's the best version I could find of the SNL "Chippendales" skit)

And the tearjerker clip:

Any other favorite Patrick Swayze moments?

Long Overdue Lollapalooza Review--Day 1

2009-09-07T12:33:00.000-05:00

Okay, so here's what we decided to do. You see, folks, Iris has some important stuff going on in real life that is preventing her from slaving away on pics and videos. So for a while, we'll have pics and video in separate posts, just so we can let you know what all went on at Lollapalooza and NIN. This way, I can write it all up before I forget everything that happened, and I don't have to feel like a jerk asking Iris about the AV stuff. She'll get to it when she gets to it.

The disadvantage of not doing this "live blogging" style is that now I have to try to remember all sorts of details from about a month ago. Unfortunately, there was no large air conditioned, AT&T-sponsored tent with computers this year, and because I am old, I was too exhausted upon returning home each night to write anything up. But I shall do my best with my fading memories.

So, Day One. A poncho was a must because for the first time since I started attending Lollapalooza, it rained on us just about all day. However, Friday had my favorite lineup of the entire weekend, so we weren't about to let a little rain stop us. On a side note, I really think they need some sort of rule prohibiting umbrellas. They did nothing to enhance the view, and people are never good at walking in large crowds with umbrellas. Someone is bound to gouge out an eye. Ponchos are much safer (if not terribly fashion-forward) and do not obstruct views of the stage or screens.

We made it to Grant Park just in time to catch The Builders and the Butchers' set. I was instantly converted to this band when we saw them opening for Amanda Palmer, and I was certainly not disappointed here. I've described them before as Flogging Molly meets Modest Mouse. They've also been compared to Tom Waites. They boast an impressive array of obscure folk instruments, and their themes are generally dark. When I listen to their music, I get a somewhat eerie feeling, like when I'm driving in some deep backwoods area at night, and it feels like just about anything could jump out at me--deer, bear, werewolves, crazed rednecks. At the same time, their music grabs you immediately; these are not the kind of songs you have to "get used to" or know the lyrics to in order to appreciate. Their music is melodic, beautiful, primal. When they have two drummers flailing against their instruments at the same time, there is something ancient and uncivilized in me that responds. I feel at home in the strange country landscapes that they create, where branches are like arms and hands are like gnarled roots.

I bought their album, "Salvation is a Deep Dark Well," and if you ever take my advice about anything, buy this album. Especially if you're road-tripping out in the woods before summer dies. The song "Vampire Lake" is probably my favorite on this album, and it was my favorite at the show. It totally sounds like the perfect song to play over the closing credits of an episode of True Blood. (I have so many awesome ideas for that show, I know.)

I'm probably not going to get that lyrical over every band I describe, so don't get too worked up now.

While we were getting some food, we happened to catch a tiny bit of The Gaslight Anthem's set. This was a band that my husband had wanted to see (but he unfortunately was scheduled to work on Day 1 of Lolla). In addition, their set began about halfway through The Builders and the Butchers, so there was no way we could have seen enough of them to appreciate them. But listening to them in the background, I had two thoughts: 1) Who invited the Cure this year? and 2) I like what I'm hearing so far. So they will have to be a band that I explore further.

While waiting for Ben Folds, we listened to Bon Iver for a while. A lot longer than I ever would have wanted to. Now there's a certain style of indie music that I just can't deal with. Fine, grow a beard and play folk music if that's what you're called to do, but for God's sake, make it interesting. I'm no expert on this guy's music, but it was a lot of acoustic, falsetto warbling. According to Wikipedia, his latest album was written after he spent three months in isolation in some cabin in the north woods of Wisconsin. And what we heard is exactly what you would imagine would be produced by someone going slowly insane in the middle of nowhere. Not like, "shrieking and running naked in the woods" insane. More like "melancholy staring out the window from the bed you haven't left in 12 days" insane. I dunno, I'm sure it's all very intelligent and thoughtful and heart-rending if you pay attention to the lyrics, but that's more attention than I'll ever devote to a guy with an acoustic guitar and a beard singing in falsetto.

Ben Folds was next! He still has quite the devoted fanbase, as this was probably the only show of the day where I felt uncomfortably hemmed in by the crowd and suggested to the group that we move back a bit. I was a big fan of the Ben Folds Five breakout hit album, Whatever and Ever Amen, with its witty lyrics and Gen-X angst--so perfect for me in that stage of my college career. After that, I kind of lost touch for some unknown reason, although I did happen to catch him live at the Guiness Oyster Fest one year, and since he spent a lot of time playing slow, ponderous tunes that night, I figured that his career was kind of heading in that direction. If you goth and punk cabaret kids aren't familiar with Ben Folds, you might know him as the producer of Amanda Palmer's solo album, Who Killed Amanda Palmer?, and I feel as though his influence is particularly strong on a song like "Astronaut"--big, crashing piano with a touch of heartbreak.

I am pleased to announce that Ben Folds kept his Lolla set up-tempo. It's really the only way to go if you're playing a large outdoor festival, where all the kiddies are on drugs, and everyone is sweaty and gross (or drenched with rain), and people are generally coming and going throughout the performance. I was happy to hear "Rockin' the Suburbs" and "Kate," an old favorite, although I would have paid him cash money to play "One Angry Dwarf and 200 Solemn Faces," as I always felt it was rather a personal anthem for me.

We took a bit of a break after Ben Folds, having a nice sit on a wet bench in front of Buckingham Fountain and doing some people-watching, but we headed back to the north side of Grant Park for a bit of the Decemberists. People who talk about these sorts of things on the Internets were wondering aloud whether the Decemberists would play their latest concept album, "The Hazards of Love" in its entirety. I guess they did, but we didn't stick around for the whole performance. It's not that I don't like the music, but it really wasn't the best venue for long, flowing dresses and quiet songs about "My love rode off into the woods today," or whatever the hell they were singing about. I once read the Wikipedia entry for this album to try to understand what the whole "story" of it was, and you can find that information here, but this is how I explained it to my companions: "Um, so there's like this woman, and she's riding off in the woods, and she falls in love with some elf or demon guy or whatever, and he's got a mother who's magical, and then the girl gets kidnapped by this evil guy...uh..." So, yeah, I'm kind of torn on it all. The music is much catchier than you would think, especially "The Rake's Song," which is rather disturbing, but it still is pretty pretentious. But at the same time, you have to give Colin Meloy credit for doing something very different from the mainstream. It was not engaging us at all during Lolla, unfortunately, and I think the music started to pick up in general as we were on the way out, but by that time, we were heading to the other side of the park for Of Montreal.

Oh God, what to say about Of Montreal without sounding like the world's crankiest old fogey...hmm.

Musically, I have no objection; pleasingly, they remind me of the Scissor Sisters. So you know, upbeat, oonce-oonce, good to dance to, good for outdoor music festivals where all the kiddies are on drugs, and everyone is sweaty and gross (or drenched with rain), and people are generally coming and going throughout the performance. Except the stage show...dear Lord. I couldn't really see it all very well from my vantage point, but it involved unnerving animation on the screen, approximately 5,000 people onstage in all sorts of costumes, ranging from alien heads to one-armed, one-legged unitard things. Were there people dressed as nuns and gorillas? I don't remember, but there might as well have been. Oh, who am I to piss on someone's enjoyable acid trip? I'm just a miserable goth at heart, so I just feel that sometimes, a LOT less is more. I do want to give Of Montreal credit, however, for ending on time, which is more than I can say for certain OTHER acts on subsequent days, but we'll get to that later.

Fortunately, it was at this point that the rain FINALLY stopped, and I felt brave enough to remove my poncho (as I had superstitiously felt during any other break in the precipitation that if I took off the poncho, I would bring on a torrential downpour and electrical storm that would shut everything down). It had been a long, rain-soaked day, but we were all eagerly awaiting Depeche Mode (well, I don't know how "eager" Mr. Iris was to see Depeche Mode, but I'm sure he was certainly eager to bring this soggy day to a close). Barring any sudden catastrophe, it looked as though the Ro Curse would finally be broken! And, shockingly, they took the stage, right on time, and Ro finally had the chance to see one of her favorite bands of all time. Well, Depeche Mode should be among everyone's favorite bands of all time, right? I've spent quite a bit of this summer listening to the old hits as well as the new album. There's something about Depeche Mode that speaks to my personal life situation as I savor my 30s--the yearning for pure love coupled with a certain knowing cynicism. Not believing in the fairy tale is not the same as not wanting the fairy tale; Martin Gore knows that, and that's what has always made Depeche Mode so resonant and heartbreaking.

The Setlist (a respectable collection of new songs and greatest hits...most likely much shorter than on other stops of their tour because at Lolla, the plug gets pulled on *everything* at 10:00 p.m.):

In Chains
Wrong
Hole to Feed
Walking in My Shoes
It's No Good
A Question of Time
Precious
Fly on the Windscreen
Home
Come Back
Policy of Truth
In Your Room
I Feel You
Enjoy the Silence
Never Let Me Down Again
Stripped
Personal Jesus

So, if you like the new album, then you'll probably think they started off strong with "In Chains" and "Wrong." (The only problem with "Wrong" is that the beginning always reminds me of the SNL parody of The McLaughlin Group)

"Hole to Feed," eh. I really would much rather have heard "In Sympathy," my favorite song from Sounds of the Universe. But at least it's better than "Peace," with the gayest of all gay DM lyrics: "It's an INEVITABILITY!!!!" That line snaps me out of whatever musical trance I happen to be in, as I think, "Ugh." Probably the most pleasant surprise of the evening was "Come Back," which was truly hypnotic, especially with the deep space imagery, although it also kind of resembles that old "Starfield" screensaver.

I certainly can't take issue with any of their other selections, although I missed "Master and Servant," "Somebody," "A Pain that I'm Used to," "A Question of Lust," "Shake the Disease," "It's No Good," "Everything Counts,"--oh, who am I kidding? I'd really have loved to see the show go on for two more hours than it did.

Dave Gahan's voice seemed a little strained and off-key, but hell, with tumors and gastrointestinal problems and leg injuries, I'm just happy he was alive and able to take the stage. Of course, he did his skeevy sexy dancing and strip show. To those who say tattoos look gross when one reaches a certain age, you couldn't prove it with Dave Gahan's upper body...yum! He wanted the crowd to do a lot of his singing for him, which is fine if he's asking us to do the chorus of "Enjoy the Silence," but he really should keep in mind that most Lolla attendees weren't even twinkles in their parents' respective eyes when "A Question of Time" came out.

Martin Gore looked fetching in a shiny silver suit and sounded pitch perfect on "Home." I wish we could have had more of those moments...what a gorgeous, gorgeous mind and voice that man has.

The highlight of the evening was "Enjoy the Silence" for me, which may not be obscure enough for some diehard Depeche Mode fans, but that song taught me at the tender age of 14 that music can make you feel funny...down there. The lyrics represented everything that I ever wanted a lover to say to me, but of course, it's so fucking romantic, it would never happen in real life, with a real average guy, if he had to come up with it on his own. The disappointment of reality is never denied, but the dream isn't surrendered. That's Depeche Mode in a nutshell for me.

And that's Day 1 of Lolla. More to come!

Modest Mouse, Live at the Aragon 8/25/09

2009-08-31T13:38:00.004-05:00

Omg, yo. You know what I think about when I think about Places Parallel? I think of Lucy Ricardo, working at the candy factory, unable to keep up with the assembly line, stuffing chocolates in her cheeks like a squirrel. There is *so much shit* we have to cover from this summer: the last of the last NIN shows (until Trent and Mariqueen and their eight kids tour America like the Von Trapp family), which I know is the only thing you're really interested in reading about, but Iris and I feel compelled to cover Lollapalooza (which is like 50 concerts all in one) and anything else we happen to see because we are Places Parallel, and that is the sort of thing we set out to do here.

The problem is that in addition to the 150,000 words I have to write, we have TONS of awesome photos and video footage, and ideally we'd have both available at the same time, but the fact of the matter is, Iris and I are both very busy people living in two different states, so the coordination of all this material is difficult. And sadly, I am NOT spending all this time sucking Trent Reznor's physical cock, as alleged. Though I wish I were! I mean, honestly, is that supposed to be some sort of insult? I hope our Anonymi curse me with a lottery win as well!

Anyway, an easy show for me to cover is the recent Modest Mouse concert that I attended with Ro and Mr. Maise and another friend (name withheld to protect the innocent). I wasn't sure of the camera policy, so I have no AV goodies for you, and it was a short, shitty performance anyway.

I think what may be difficult for the Anonymi to grasp is that I am not a professional concert reviewer. I am not forced to attend all shows in my area, good and bad. I generally buy tickets for acts that I enjoy, so probably about 90% of the time, I enjoy what I see. If I get cranky and dissatisfied, it's usually in regard to whatever opening acts imposed upon us, the audience. So it's somewhat of a novelty to me to give a negative review to a show.

Not that I would give Modest Mouse a negative review in general. I love their pessimistic outlook paired with infectious melodies. No one sings, warbles, and roars quite like Isaac Brock, and what I think I love about this band is that they are distinctly American. This band is not trying to be the 10,000th rip-off of Joy Division. Their sound originates in dark pine forests and mountains of the Pacific Northwest. The songs acknowledge the dangerous wild places of the world and of our minds with a resigned shrug. It's like those frenzied seconds in the middle of a car accident, when you realize what's going on, recognize that you're flying through the windshield, and then you think, "Well, this is exactly what I expected would happen."

There is something very cathartic about giving in to Isaac Brock's passions, thinking about someone who has fucked you over by being absent and withholding, and singing, "Are you dead or are you sleeping? Are you dead or are you sleeping? Are you dead or are you sleeping? God, I sure hope you are dead." The only problem with this show was, was Isaac Brock dead or sleeping himself?

Modest Mouse was preceded onstage by The Duchess and the Duke, but I can't tell you a word about them because this show started at 6:30, and us hard-working 30-somethings who are stuck working in the burbs have to commute in and grab a bite to eat. In fact, Modest Mouse themselves took the stage earlier than we had anticipated (between 7:45-8 p.m.), so we missed the first song getting our tickets scanned and receiving the usual strip-search from venue staff. Here's the setlist (via the Modest Mouse website):

King Rat
3rd Planet
Education
Black Cadillacs
Gravity Rides Everything
Shit Luck
Satellite Skin
Tiny Cities Made Of Ashes
Baby Blue Sedan
Dashboard
Dramamine
Life Like Weeds (Lyric Tease)
Guilty Cocker Spaniels
Blame It On The Tetons
Wild Packs Of Family Dogs
The View
Satin In A Coffin

Encore:

Paper Thin Walls
Ohio
Parting Of The Sensory

Well, it wasn't all bad. Highlights of the show for me included the following:
--"Shit Luck," a hard-hitting, bleak song that really wouldn't be out of place in Trent's catalogue;
--The radio-friendly (but not dumbed down) and energetic "Dashboard";

(credit must go to Rockerachick88 on YouTube for the video)

--"The View" which features this chorus, which will resonate with anyone who's lived through tough times, "As life gets longer, awful feels softer/Well it feels pretty soft to me/And if it takes shit to make bliss, then I feel pretty blissfully."

(credit must to go tkreuser on YouTube for the video)

--"Satin in a Coffin," the menacing chorus of which I quoted above

(credit must to go tkreuser on YouTube for the video)

--"Parting of the Sensory" with its unforgettable, hypnotic primal ending: "Well some day you will die somehow/And something's going to steal your carbon."

So looking at that list of highlights, it's going to be hard for me convey what exactly was wrong. I think the problem was not what was there, but what was missing. I've seen Modest Mouse twice before, and on those previous occasions, they had a lot more energy and verve. You know how at an awesome show, you totally lose yourself in the music and the joyful vibe of the crowd around you? Instead, my friends and I felt oddly disengaged. My friend, a true blue Modest Mouse fan *long* before I had ever heard of them, turned to me and asked me my opinion about tattoos during the proceedings. We just couldn't get in the zone.

Perhaps it had something to do with the inside temperature being somewhere around 5,000 degrees Fahrenheit. Perhaps the heat led to the concert's end time of 9:15p.m. A band of their caliber and extensive catalogue could have done a lot more...at least throw us newbie fans a bone with "Float On" or something. Maybe if the show itself had been more intense, we wouldn't have felt let down. As it was, it felt like an hour of foreplay with nothing really happening. Should I blame it on the Tetons?

Trent's Alternate Career Options #1...

2009-08-18T13:06:00.004-05:00

Well, while you all are waiting for Iris and me to get our metaphorical shit together and review the terrific shows we witnessed at Lolla, and since you all are obsessed with Trent Reznor no matter what we intend to discuss, I figured that here might be a good place to discuss the question "What next?".

Sure, Trent talks about making more music and helping to change the way we buy and listen to music and maybe even putting together a "Year Zero" TV series, but we also think he should branch out into other areas while he's at it.

For example, my musical obsession, Trent, should consider a recurring role on my TV obsession, True Blood. How perfect would that be? He's hot enough to join the hotttttest male castmembers of all time, and it would bring him back to his once-adopted home of Louisiana, and people have thought he was a vampire for like 20 years now anyway.

For those of you unlucky enough not to have experienced this HBO serial masterpiece, True Blood follows the adventures of Sookie (Anna Paquin), a telepathic waitress in a small (but *very* eccentric) town in Louisiana. Vampires have "come out of the coffin" so to speak and have joined society, so there is lots of tension between the town's human and vampire residents. Sookie has a vampire boyfriend, Bill (Stephen Moyer), who has a hilarious Civil War-era accent and is prone to exclaiming, "SUH-kie!" when he's being all paternalistic and condescending like he usually is. She has a couple of other admirers: Sam (Sam Trammell), a shapeshifter who is not only super-hot as a man but turns into a DOG and Eric (Alexander Skarsgard), an older, more powerful, volcanically hot Viking vampire who is pretty ruthless and manipulative but in recent episodes is also revealing his more vulnerable emotions. And that's not even getting into the half of it. All I can say is, if you enjoy your horror mixed with Southern gothic melodrama and humor and if you enjoy looking at attractive men, this show is for you. And I think it's right up Trent's alley.

See, wouldn't he fit in just perfectly here? (Although he'd probably have to gain a little weight for the part)

So to Alan Ball, Trent...make this happen! Especially if Trent would be able to say the line, "I'd like to make a withdrawal."

Lolla preview!

2009-08-04T12:11:00.002-05:00

Wow, is it August already? How the hell did that happen?

In just a couple of days, I will clean the shit out of my house to make it habitable for Iris and Mr. Iris, and then we will set out on our yearly Lollapalooza marathon. So get prepared for reviews and photos and videos (maybe not all in a timely fashion, but eventually). I'm swamped at work presently, but I'll give you guys a cursory list of some of the acts I'm looking forward to:

1) The Builders and the Butchers: I instantly fell in love with this band when they opened for Amanda Palmer, and I'm definitely looking forward to seeing them again. As I recall, they kind of sound like what would happen if Flogging Molly and Modest Mouse had a baby.

2) Ben Folds: I haven't paid much attention to him since his late '90s heyday, but he's always been an engaging storyteller with his music, and he did just produce Amanda Palmer's latest album, so maybe she gave him a few tips re: grinding against the piano.

3) The Decemberists: I can't decide whether their latest concept album, "The Hazards of Love" is the coolest thing ever or the most pretentious thing ever, but they're definitely worth checking out.

4) Peter Bjorn and John: Remember that "We don't care about the old folks" song that was on the radio a year or two back? That was pretty good.

5) Kings of Leon--I wouldn't mind seeing them, except we can't. Because they are scheduled against...

6) DEPECHE MODE! If Ro doesn't kill them with the previously mentioned Ro Curse, that is. God knows she's tried, with gastroenteritis and a malignant bladder tumor and torn ligaments. Why do you hate Dave Gahan, Ro? Why? I've been listening to "Sounds of the Universe" all summer, so in addition to the old favorites, I'm really looking forward to hearing "In Chains," "Wrong," and my ultimate FAVORITE from the album "In Sympathy." I'm not, however, looking forward to that part of "Peace" where either Martin or Dave gayly shouts, "It's an INEVITABILITY!!!"

7) Thenewno2: I don't know a thing about this band, really, but I've blogged about them before because they are fronted by Dhani Harrison, son and veritable clone of George Harrison, and how awesome is that? I'm really looking forward to finally seeing them in person.

8) TV on the Radio: This will be their second Lolla appearance, and I hope it will be as good as the first. I just remember being sort of entranced during this song:

9) Tool: Well, I'm not really looking forward to Tool. But my husband is! And I think the Irises are too. I probably would gladly have skipped them for the Beastie Boys, but alas, that was not meant to be. Get well soon, Adam Yauch!

10) Airborne Toxic Event: Gosh, I probably have downloaded a ton of albums before seeing these bands in concert, but I'll happily attend this band's set just to hear "Sometime Around Midnight."

11) Lou Reed: The man is a legend, and frankly, he has got some big shoes to fill after Iggy Pop's unforgettable, chaotic performance.

12) Neko Case: I'm not terribly familiar with her work, but she's a huge supporter of greyhounds! Anyone who is a friend to the greys is a friend of mine.

13) The Killers: Always entertaining, but I won't be able to see them because I'm saving my last Lolla show of 2009 for...

14) Jane's Addiction: Chicago didn't get a full NINJA show because JA was scheduled to play Lolla, the event that they started. Looking forward to Parry Farrell writhing like a snake and talking crazy and Dave Navarro running around without a shirt.

But really, more than any of these...I'm most looking forward to the bands I have yet to discover. The performances that make me an instant fan, move me to download the albums and have me singing along in my car the rest of the year.

More to come!

The Most Horrific NIN-Related Nightmare I've Ever Had...

2009-07-26T07:41:00.004-05:00

Straight up, y'all.

So the other night, I dreamt that Iris and I were backstage at the Aragon, alone with Trent Reznor.

No, wait...it gets worse.

His new cause du jour was preventing STDs, so he was training Iris and me to administer these injections of vaccinated foam...up NIN fans' vaginas. Then he went out in the hallway to advertise these vaccinations, holding a singing fish in his arms.

That's when I woke up...horrified.

Oh, and by the way, we got our tickets for the last Chicago show, so I guess we can quit our bitching...

Some of You May Be Wondering...

2009-07-17T21:37:00.006-05:00

How the Chicago NIN presale went for us.

A Maise and Iris Collaboration:

Perfect little scheme
The kind that screws scalpers
I got online at 5
So did Ro.
No one to blame
Always the same
Error message...
Reload
Reload
Reload
RELOAD...IT'S FUCKED!

It took time...to make me realize,
It took time...to make me realize,
It took time...to make me realize,
It took time...FUCK, I'll NEVER SEE THIS SITE

Smashed up my monitor
Smashed up my new keyboard
Smashed up my computer desk
Smashed up my love for Trent

Smashed up my Slip CD
Smashed up Downward Spiral too...
Gonna smash the whole collection
I don't know what else I should do

Filled up with hope...got my credit card
Still cannot get to Music Today
Watching the site, thought I was in line,
Now watching it FAIL. the server's in a systematic decline
Oh the fans! Trent, you betray
If he gave me tickets, I'd throw them away
After everything I've spent, my husband asks "Aren't you done yet?"

Smashed up my monitor
Smashed up my new keyboard
Smashed up my computer desk
Smashed up my love for Trent

Smashed up my Slip CD
Smashed up Downward Spiral too...
Gonna smash the whole collection
I don't know what else I should do

I tried...
And I gave up
Ro tried...
And she gave up
Iris tried...
And she gave up...
We tried...
AND WE GAVE UP!!!!!

Smashed up my monitor
Smashed up my new keyboard
Smashed up my computer desk
Smashed up my love for Trent

Smashed up my Slip CD
Smashed up Downward Spiral too...
Gonna smash the whole collection
I don't know what else I should do

Throw the tix away!
Throw them AWAY!!!!!

RIP Eric De La Cruz

2009-07-07T15:23:00.003-05:00

Rest in peace, Eric. We know you're in a place with no pain, illness, or sorrow. We didn't know you, of course, but we were touched and amazed by the ferocity and love and devotion your family displayed as they fought for your life. We would like to thank you for waking people up to the dire state of health care in the U.S. It's a uniquely American tragedy, isn't it? The way that a country with so much--more than enough for everyone--allows so many to go without. But we also thank you for inspiring people to give a little to someone in need.

Here's to your life and to keeping up the fight for change!

I'm Not Sure If You've Heard...

2009-06-29T11:08:00.004-05:00

But Michael Jackson has passed away at the age of 50.

The media frenzy (reminiscent of Princess Diana's funeral) is at once baffling, in the face of much more important issues--Iran, North Korea, Afghanistan, Iraq, U.S. health care, etc. But the constant coverage and over-the-top spectacle are certainly predictable, if not understandable. It was a bit of a shock, and aren't we all just the tiniest bit curious? What made this strange, sad man suddenly drop dead? Are we finally going to get the exclusive, tell-all details? Of course, it's all none of our business, and the tabloid-consuming public is complicit in many ways in his ultimate madness and downfall, I'm sure. But if you're my age, Michael Jackson most likely meant something to you at some point in your childhood. And you may find it's still possible to love the old hits while watching in dismay as his face corroded and he was accused of molesting CHILDREN, for Christ's sake.

I am of an age where Michael Jackson was one of my first celebrity crushes--I was about seven or eight years old when "Billie Jean" and "Beat It" were all the rage. My best childhood friend--the neighbor boy next door--had Michael Jackson albums that we would listen to religiously after school. He was grounded once when a nun caught him trying to moonwalk out of church. I remember being at the baby shower of a family friend when the "Thriller" video premiered and how everyone at this baby shower--young and old alike--stopped everything just to watch this video. I remember watching MTV for hours, waiting for Michael Jackson videos to play. ("Darn it, it's just Prince again.") I loved his infectious pop songs, his dancing (before all the crotch-grabbing), his singing (before all the interjections of "SHAMON!"), his sense of style that had everyone looking insane in the 80s, emulating him with single white gloves and "Beat It" and "Thriller" jackets. So much childhood can be conjured up just by listening to those songs.

And then there was the realization that my peers and I had left childhood behind, but Michael never had. This man grew older and stranger-looking and clung to tree-climbing and amusement parks and petting zoos, which I guess wouldn't have been so awful if it weren't for the "slumber parties" that were frankly sinister. He had been robbed of his innocence long ago and didn't understand that you can't recreate it. He didn't understand that LOTS of people are robbed of an idyllic childhood yet turn out okay, because he had lived his *entire life* in a narcissistic celebrity bubble. And although I can't say for certain what went on behind closed doors, he may have damaged some children along the way. Or even damaged them by association...once molestation charges are levied, how do you think other kids and adults would react by finding out you hung out at Neverland...even if nothing had actually happened? I certainly hope that none of it was ever true, but his legacy will never shake those suspicions.

A lot of the tributes and public mourning are totally hypocritical. All of the current stars wailing about Michael Jackson's music and legacy--I don't remember a lot of them sitting at the feet of their master in recent years. All of the news stations covering his death and funeral arrangements 24-7...these were the same media figures that reveled in his bizarre antics.

When I think of Michael Jackson, I reflect on the sadness of his life...a young boy abused, a great talent exploited, a beautiful black face willingly mutilated. But I can't give myself over to hysterical mourning because well, a) I never knew him and b) I feel uncomfortable lionizing someone who may have left child victims in his wake. I guess the kindest thing to do is to try to remember the good about him, to remember him in his prime, when he really was the King of Pop, when I thought he was totally, totally cute.

Remember him like this:

Dear_Trent_#_42

2009-06-11T11:18:00.008-05:00

Dear Trent,

Deirdre here. I've been... well, let's say "out of commission" for awhile now, but I felt like it was time for the former president of the Girls Who Love Trent Club to come forward and say a few words in view of it being the end of the road for Nine Inch Nails, and your impending nuptials and the way you're so hassled by haters these days.

Fucking haters. Seriously. Where do these (apparently often fat) bitches get off? Don't they know that if they really, really loved you, like I do, they could never do anything but wish you joy in all your future endeavors? I've never actually seen or heard what kinds of things these members of "the community" have to say, but I just think you should know that not all girls who love you are hateful, plus-size lying whores; or for that matter, would even be WILLING to fuck you if you offered, let alone saddling up and then telling the whole internets about (real or fictional) cocks-of-rock cowboy stories. Some of us girls who love you (and have known the self-righteous hatertude of all the people who are so much better at being NIN fans than we ever were, since they are serious people who don't love you, and know all about synths and shit) have only ever wished you all the love in the world and a lifetime of satisfying work.

What I'm trying to say, Sparklepants, is remember back in the salad days of wearingthesechains.com when I told you that my love would always be true, that my heart would always throb your name, and that you'd always be inside me, like, forever? Well, nothing has changed; it's still true, and shall ever be. I'll always remember the times when your awesome rockshow spoke it's secret language to me, making me stronger and better able to be me without compromising, and helped me fight on, just like I'll never forget the way you brought new meaning to the words "Jesus motherfucking Christ, that guy is smoking hot, look at his TEETH!"

But, does that mean, as some might ask, that now I must mourn the fact that you have found love, and can't keep it in? Did I rend my garments upon learning that you are officially off the market, and that love now calls YOU to shout it from the rooftops? Of course not! I mean, let's face it: wherever you were ON the market, I never shopped there, but more importantly, my dear, dear Trent, I love to hear it! It makes me feel closer to you than ever before because finally: you know how I felt about you.

Just let me know, darling, if you want me to give you away at the wedding. I'm ready!

Love and kisses forever and ever,
Dierdre

PS. Regarding the haters who apparently speak louder than all the love: go home and meditate or something, baby; they aren't worth the angst. Fuck 'em!

Trent vs. The Twits...

2009-06-10T21:05:00.003-05:00

During his career, Trent Reznor has had a curious relationship with his fans. His music has always been raw, personal, deeply confessional; yet, Trent himself was pretty mysterious--prone to disappearing for years on end rather than having his personal relationships and breakdowns broadcast in the tabloids and on gossip sites. Occasionally he'd post a few cryptic or sarcastic words on nin.com, sending his fans into an absolute tizzy.

In recent years, however, he's been surprisingly open and keen on interaction with his fans. He has been lurking and posting on NIN message boards; blogging; posting pictures of his various pets, his studio, and his travels; letting us remix his music; giving us a free album and other goodies; answering fan questions in online interviews; asking us to make mostly awful videos in response to "Ghosts I-IV," (except for this one, which is BRILLIANT); and lately, embracing the addictive powers of Twitter and urging us all to save a life. Most surprisingly, he has revealed more of his personal life to us than ever before. The days of scouring the dark corners of the Internet for any mention of "Trent Reznor and girlfriend" are over. Trent is in love, people, and he wants to shout it from the mountaintops, whether the fangirls can handle it or not.

I would say about 95 percent of us are delighted with this opportunity to reach out to Trent and regularly express our admiration, support and undying love to him through various media. There are some individuals, however, who have been continually harassing the guy to the point that it's pushing him--a total computer geek and internet addict--offline. I've checked out some of their profiles on Twitter, but I'm not going to name anyone in particular or link to them because they do not need any more fucking attention, negative or otherwise.

Today, Trent wrote an essay of sorts on nin.com, reflecting on Twitter and other online communities and how the disadvantages are starting to outweigh the benefits. You can read it here. I don't really approve of the part where he takes revenge on Metal Sludge haters by calling them FAT and UGLY (oooh! Burn!)--he comes off looking sizeist, and like there's nothing else wrong with these people other than their appearance? Please. But mostly, this post was just really sad to me. Trent really has given us so much in terms of his music and giving his fans so many opportunities to communicate with him and each other. And in return, the people who hate him because they can't have him or the people who are pissed because he's not really the Trent of their gothemo dreams have been making his life fucking miserable. Theirs is a misplaced, imaginary love turned to anger turned to hate, and I'm sure at times it's probably scary for Trent.

I've not really gotten myself involved in Trent's online spats because a) I don't need to be his freaking toadie; he can fight his own battles and b) although I can understand why he loses patience and calls people out based on what they say to him, I don't like it when NIN fans then employ mob action on people who are most likely delusional or disturbed. Also, c) I feel like Trent kinda perpetuates the problem by giving the haters the attention they crave. Again, based on the things that people say to him, like, "I hope you overdose again" or racist comments about his fiancee or people accusing him of a PR stunt when he has been devoting hours before every show meeting-and-greeting for the sake of raising a million dollars for Eric De La Cruz, I can understand why he gets cranky. Shit, someone on here calls me fat, and it puts me in a pissy mood. This feeling of "You don't even know me!" and "What have I ever done to you? Fuck off!" Yeah, I can identify. But we have just a handful of the Anonymi, who are easily ridiculed or ignored. Trent has the deranged "fans" who think they can win his heart by insulting Mariqueen. He has the people who are just fucking assholes who enjoy picking a fight as long as they don't have to say these things in person. He's got the racists, the dissatisfied customers, the eternal cynics. Granted, this is a small number of actual people, but they seem to be PROLIFIC. And Twitter is set up to allow people to post all manner of inanity 24 hours a day from their computers, their phones, their ipods. Unless he can tune it all out somehow, I don't blame him for retiring the Twitter account.

To be honest, I kind of miss Trent Reznor, Man of Mystery. I loved the music, the persona, and the rare glimpses into his real life that revealed that he's a funny, nerdy guy at heart and that he really likes animals and video games. Not expecting to ever be a part of his real life, I kind of liked the rest being left up to my imagination. It's much funnier to *imagine* Trent the tortured, angst-filled artist eating Lucky Charms and watching Good Morning America in his underwear. Not that I don't love and respect the real, human Trent that we've had a chance to get to know recently. But if he feels like he needs to withdraw that in order to save his own sanity, I'm cool with that. I don't need him to reveal his soft, vulnerable underbelly if it means that he starts to hate people. My imagination can more than compensate: Trent on a canoe, Trent trying to get a parking sticker from his housing association, Trent in a frou-frou pet boutique agonizing whether he should start his dogs on a raw diet...

But if Trent is still on the fence as to whether he should withdraw completely from the NINerverse, I would like to point out that it was through Twitter and nin.com that he basically raised the money to pay for a man's heart transplant outright. There is incredible stupidity on the Internet, yes, but I'm not willing to say that it's only the idiots who rule.

Oh, and Anonymi? If you're the cause of all this harassment and annoyance, lay off already! Jesus.

NIN Live at the Charter One Pavilion, Chicago 5/29/09

2009-06-03T13:56:00.008-05:00

And now, finally, we can talk about the concert itself!

I was deeply concerned as the crowd started to gather and the sun set. My limping and hobbling was only getting worse, and I had several more hours to stand on my blistered feet. In addition, my headache wasn't improving, despite the regular Tylenol dosing and eating a million-dollar cheeseburger. The ear-shattering noise of a NIN concert was surely a one-way ticket to Migraine-land. I was never prone to this condition when I was younger, but I am sadly afflicted now, and I was worried that to counter the ecstasy and joy of the meet-and-greet and soundcheck, I would be spending the next few hours in agony until I barfed with an aching head. What I really wanted was a dark room, a cold compress, and silence. For this reason alone, I was not particularly looking forward to Street Sweeper Social Club.

As lead vocalist Boots Reilly is fond of proclaiming, "The Street Sweeper Social Club is more than a band--it's a social club." It's also more than a social club; it is also apparently an analgesic, as I swear my headache completely disappeared by the time they were finished with their half-hour set. I attribute my miracle cure to the fact that I had so much fun watching them. They sound quite a bit like Rage Against the Machine to my ears, except perhaps...less enraged and dancier. Don't get me wrong, Tom Morello is still committed to any number of leftist social causes, and part of the purpose of Street Sweeper Social Club is to bring awareness to these causes, but Boots Reilly (who I SWEAR looks just like the dearly departed Warrick on CSI) won't stop the show in order to rant and preach, a la our friend Zack de la Rocha. Tom Morello still does amazing things with his guitar, and Boots has some pretty sweet moves.

Here they are, performing "100 Little Curses":

Okay, doesn't that just melt your fucking face off? Seriously, it was love at first sight, and I was not at all in the mood for an opening band when they first took the stage. I don't really know the lyrics to this song, but even if it's just as commie pinko as anything RATM made (and mind you, I'm a hemorrhaging-heart liberal), it's just so...fun. Street Sweeper Social Club's album comes out on June 19th, I believe, and I definitely will be getting it and look forward to seeing them again in concert soon.

Now that I look back on it, this last NIN show was kind of a bittersweet blur. Although I strongly doubt that it's the last time I'll ever see Trent Reznor on a stage, I think he's giving himself permission to retire the old chestnuts. (Unless he's hard up at any point and needs a cash infusion with a "reunion" tour) And I'm fine with that. I mean, after eight live shows in a relatively short period of time, even I am like, "Oh God, 'Suck' again?!" I can't even imagine how repetitive it gets for Trent and the band on one tour, let alone all the touring that's been done since 2004-ish. On the other hand, these songs are so close to my heart and have been and continue to be like friends in my times of need, that it's sad to reflect on the fact that this may very well be the last time that I will be so transported to a place of elation and excitement. Because I was seriously blissed out through this entire show. I thought of all the times I've been in some hardcore emotional pain, shouting along with these songs in the car, except in concert it just feels like tremendous happiness and catharsis, and no matter how many times I hear them live or how some idiot goes "WHOO!" at the wrong part or some eight-foot-tall guy blocks my view of the band, these songs will always belong to me in a very deep and personal way. And these songs will belong to everyone else in similar ways, I expect. And it's sad to see Trent put them away in a cardboard box and go on to his new and contented life, but I try to keep in mind that I will still have these songs when I need them, right on my ipod. Trent's like The Electric Grandmother in that way. (And that movie always made me cry, incidentally.) And that's probably the first and last time Trent has ever been compared to The Electric Grandmother.

Anyway.

Here is the setlist, courtesy of "stealth_" at nin.com because my blissed out state prevented me from taking on any secretarial duties:

"Somewhat Damaged
Terrible Lie
Heresy
March of the Pigs
Piggy (regular)
Metal
The Becoming
I'm Afraid of Americans
Burn
Gave Up
La Mer
The Fragile
Gone, Still
The Way Out is Through
Wish
Survivalism
Mr. Self Destruct
Suck
The Day the World Went Away
Hurt
The Hand that Feeds
Head like a Hole"

A solid, hard-hitting line-up. You'll notice something missing, though. Hmmmm...

NO "PHYSICAL (YOU'RE SO)". I PHYSICALLY asked Trent to play "PHYSICAL" and was in PHYSICAL pain all throughout the show, and I was denied. Bah! And to rub it in, he played it the next night! Whatevs, Old Man Reznor, I prefer the l'orangerie stank version anyway. So there.

One thing did make up for this minor disappointment, however. (And I wasn't REALLY expecting him to take requests, after all). That was this song:

What a pleasant surprise! I've heard David Bowie play this live in the past, but not Trent. You'll notice at the beginning of the clip, Trent was bitching about the weather because he seems to be under the impression that May 29 = Summer in Chicago. No, sir. May 29 = Not As Likely To Snow. Summer doesn't begin until somewhere around June 30th or so.

A new song for me was a cover of Gary Numan's "Metal":

I'm not the big Gary Numan expert, so I don't have a lot of analysis to provide, but watching this video is causing me to dance at my desk here at work. Ahem.

The Downward Spiral was well-represented in this show. How awesome is it to hear "Heresy" again?

Also, they have a new and improved intro to "Mr. Self Destruct" these days:

Didn't we just have an Anonymous bitching that he/she heard from someone else that the show wasn't good? This person called Trent Reznor a "donkey," so I can only presume that it's Gordon Ramsey. Well, I can inform you, and I hope that you can tell from the clips above, that all of the old passion was there, even though Trent's voice did sound kind of raggedy. This could just be a natural result of screaming his head off every night while on tour for the better part of five years, or maybe he was catching Robin's illness. But at no point did I feel like he was phoning it in. Jesus, there's no pleasing some people.

We also heard some "Fragile" favorites, including, surprisingly "The Fragile." I know it's probably like the fangirl anthem because it's as close to a love song as classic NIN gets, but I've always loved it and was happy to finally hear it live. Some good jamming goes on during "The Day The World Went Away." (Made me feel like I was watching the Terminator: Salvation trailer):

As usual, Trent wasn't terribly chatty during the show, but we did get this speech from him:

Oh hey, Trent! I noticed that you screwed up the lyrics to "Terrible Lie," and now I'm BLOGGING about it. Mwa ha ha ha ha!

So yeah, I think about wraps it up, unless Iris or Ro can think of anything to add. I'm very grateful to Trent for the music, the shows, the entire Maise experience. It's led me to meet some very cool people and go to very cool places. I hope he enjoys his break, has fun with his dogs and fiancee, rests his voice, and gives us something new to talk about very soon.

But of course, we'll carry on here at Places Parallel. There's other music out there to discuss, even if it's not nearly as fun as talking about NIN. We've got Lollapalooza coming up this summer. And I'm sure something or other Trent says on Twitter will bring the Anonymi out of the woodwork. So never fear, friends! It's not the end of the road for US!

(oh, and always, more pictures to be found here.)

You Are The Perfect Hug

2009-06-02T19:59:00.012-05:00

It's kinda hard to know where to put this, but since this was like the best 5 seconds of. my. life. I think it deserves its own mini-posting. So as Maise said in her review, we were separated for the onstage group photo and, really, I had no idea where I was going, so I was a little shocked when I stopped filming and realized I was standing right next to Ilan and Justin. I actually didn't even see Trent until after Rob had snapped a few shots. Immediately after that, there was this stage manager chick who was trying to quickly wrangle everyone offstage so she could bring up the next group. I let her tug at my sleeve for about two steps before I overheard some girls behind me say, "Trent, you said the donation thing included a hug so..."

That was all it took for me to shake the stage manager, but she didn't give up without a fight. I faked right, I faked left, then I sacrificed another fan by pushing him into her and running to the left again. Even so, I only narrowly escaped her grasp. In a second, she was hot on my heels as I rounded behind Ilan's drum kit. Just as she was reaching for me again, I took a daring dive over the bass drum and straight into Trent's muscly, awaiting arms, where he held me tight and stroked my hair while whispering sweet nothings into my ear. -le sigh-

Okay, so maybe that's not totally how it went down, but a girl can daydream, can't she? I did manage to ditch the stage manager, so I walked up to Trent and asked "So can I get a hug too?" He looked at me for a second (he was either totally checking out my boobs or was reading the L'orangerie Stank shirt. Both possibilities make me giggle). Then he tilted his head to the side and nodded while motioning with his hand, "okay, come on." I went in for a criss-cross hug (one arm over his shoulder, one arm under the other shoulder with him vice-versa), and this is where things speed up and slow down. It was only about 5 seconds, but in my head it was "OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG," and out loud I think I said "thank you, thank you, thank you." It gets slightly fuzzy at that point.

As a side note, I wish I could say that I maintained the slightest bit of composure when talking to the band as Maise did while we got our autographs, but I can't. No, instead I went off about the most inane shit ever and at a "Gilmore Girls" quipping-session pace to boot. It was some serious *face palm* going on. I still had the same rapid-fire pace when saying my multiple "thank you" in Trent's ear, which I'm sure wasn't weird at. all. But I squeezed him, he squeezed back, my head nearly exploded, and I floated off the stage with Mr. Iris, completely elated.

Regarding the next part, even then I was thinking "this is kinda gross," but this is what happens when you go hugging rock stars. As Mr. Iris and I were walking down the offstage ramp, the breeze picked up, and I noticed my cheek was wet. I know you all probably think I was crying at this point, but that's not the case. It was Trent's sweat, which means there was like cheek-to-cheek or cheek-to-ear contact going on while I was latched on to him. So that part was awesome, but at the same time "Eww." Before you ask, I didn't go all fangirl and save the "precious fluid" in a glass vial to use later in some weird cloning experiment. I just kind of wiped it off and later, because I'm the epitome of grace, I managed to splash my own beer on my face while trying to shuffle through my purse, hold a camera, hold a beer, and not lose my place in line at the merch table. D'oh!

So, yeah, that's my tale of hugging the seemingly unhuggable. I grabbed Maise and Ro after their group photo and hugged them both to try and share the experience. Then we staked out a spot to watch the rest of the show. Stay tuned for Part II of our review--coming at you "soon."

Places Parallel MEETS Nine Inch Nails--May 29, 2009

2009-06-01T15:20:00.008-05:00

And now...what you've all been waiting for...Maise, Iris and Ro backstage for the NIN soundcheck and meet-and-greet!

First of all, the reason for the season is Eric De La Cruz, and we wish him and his family the best. Please keep the De La Cruz family in your thoughts and prayers, as his health condition remains dire. I believe that there will be continued donation opportunities through NIN and Janes Addiction. I encourage you to take advantage of these because heart transplants are frighteningly expensive, and it's good karma to extend a little kindness to a stranger in this condition. Millions of Americans have inadequate health insurance or no health insurance, and basically any kind of catastrophic health crisis could turn all our lives upside down. So until a political solution to the problem is found, I encourage you all to help in whatever way you can, if you can. Plus, as we will report, Trent and co. are making it VERY MUCH worth your while to donate!

The NIN camp asked us to report at the Charter One Pavilion at Northerly Island at 4:00, with the NIN meet-and-greet scheduled to begin at 4:15. This was our first time at this venue; it is located on the grounds of what used to be Meigs Airport. It's a surprisingly small and intimate outdoor venue, and I found myself pleasantly surprised, except for the parking snafu when we arrived. We arrived at the Pavilion very close to 4:00 because traffic had been horrendously slow and were dismayed to be turned around and directed to the North Garage at Soldier Field. It's not very far away, but it was an unwelcome delay, especially because we had driven past the garage, and there was no indication that NIN concertgoers were to park there. We were supposed to have prepaid parking, included as one of the gazillion service fees with our ticket. But since we were parking at 3:55, rather than 4:00, it was going to cost us $19. Nevertheless, we paid up because we were concerned about the sizeable line that had already formed outside of the venue. But still, it was pretty bullshit that we had to pay for parking unnecessarily just because we were there five minutes before the arbitrary starting time. Meh.

We then walked back as fast we could to the Charter One Pavilion, which had tragic consequences for yours truly. My shoes weren't made for speed-walking, and I wound up with enormous blisters all over my feet, so I was hobbling around pathetically, like some kind of unfortunate Dickens character, before the evening even started. I was also afflicted with a chronic headache all weekend, so I was popping Tylenol Rapid Release the way House inhales Vicodin.

We had no idea how many people to expect at our meet-and-greet, at the $300 level, but I would estimate it was maybe about 200. Also, I couldn't tell how many people had provided $1,000 donations, but I think at one point, we guessed around 30. I hope that's helpful in case you will be participating in any of these any time soon. The line seemed MUCH larger than that initially because people were also lining up to get to the pit.

We were allowed in and then stood in a long line. A very friendly and courteous member of the NIN staff thanked us for our donations and informed us that we were allowed to have one item signed by the band and that no pictures or other nonsense would be allowed at this time because of the large number of people present. Then we would be taking a "group picture" with the band, and then the soundcheck would take place.

The crowd was very docile and patient. We had some people in full goth regalia and groupie attire (which puzzles me, as five-inch heels would be impractical concertwear, no?), and people brought a large variety of items in to be signed: CDs, albums, posters, artwork (hmmm...maybe we should have brought The Painting...), guitars, etc. I was kicking myself because in my rush to get out of the house, I had forgotten my copy of The Slip, which I intended to have autographed. Fortunately, the tickets were nice and large and could easily accommodate four signatures. See?

Tom Morello and Boots Reilly from Street Sweeper Social Club were also kind of hanging around, and although we weren't able to get any autographs from them, they did pass through the crowd now and then and said hi. Ro was hoping to impress her five-year-old nephew with this Tom Morello sighting, as her nephew is quite the "Guitar Hero" prodigy, but I don't think he believed her.

We approached the table where the band was sitting, and the nerves started to kick in. What, for example, am I supposed to say to Ilan Rubin?! The band was sitting at a long brown table underneath a white tent. There was some really nice outdoor furniture set up under the tent, as well as a gothy-looking chandelier with various colored light bulbs. I have no idea what was going on with that, but I would presume that the $1,000 donors would take advantage of that setup? Or maybe they just really like having an outdoor chandelier. I dunno.

Okay, so here's how my NINteractions went:

Ilan: [greeting me with a big smile and handshake]: Hi!
Me: [smiling back] Hi there! [As he signed] Nice chandelier!
Ilan: Huh? Oh...yes...I picked it out myself.
Me: Thank you! [Moving along]

Oh God, Trent was next. Okay, all you anonymous haters can fuck yourselves. Trent is NOT fat. Not in any way. He is very handsome in person, but he looks like he needs about 300 hours of sleep. Touring takes a toll, and I'm glad he'll be getting some rest soon. He seemed friendly, but tired. Or maybe slightly guarded. But he smiled at me and shook my hand.

Me: HI!
Trent: Hi.
Me: Thanks so much for doing this!
Trent: Thanks for helping out.
Me: You're playing "Physical" tonight, right? Not the Olivia Newton John version.
Trent: Well...I could tell you. But then I'd have to kill you.
Me: Well, ha, ha, in that case...thanks! [Moving along]

Next up was Justin Meldal-Johnsen. I was slightly concerned about finding something to say to him, but I noticed that he recently tweeted about attending a Cubs game with Tom Morello and co. I was also impressed at how friendly and cheerful he was.

Justin: Hi! What's your name?
Me: _____. [I didn't have time to out myself as "Maise" coherently to any member of the band. If they'd even know what the hell I'm talking about.]
Justin: I'm Justin!
Me: I didn't recognize you without all the hair. Did you enjoy the Cubs game last night?
Justin: I did, until I got booed for cheering on the Dodgers.
Me: [not sure what to say without dissing the Dodgers] Ah, well...thanks! [Moving along]

Finally, I arrived at Robin's station. He had a sign in front of him that read, "Hi, I'm Robin! I'm sick, and I can't talk!"

Me: Oh no, I'm sorry you're sick! I hope you feel better soon!
Robin: [croaking] Thanks!
Me: [remembering Aaron North with a shudder] I am SO GLAD you are back in the band.
Robin: [croaking] Me too!

I kind of have a crush on Robin now.

And then that was that. I was proud of myself for remaining fairly coherent throughout all of these encounters, but I wish I could have made more of a lasting impression. Maybe if I had had them sign my tits...oh well.

After we made it through the meet-and-greet line, it was announced that because time was running out, NIN was going to do the soundcheck and then get us up onstage for group photos.

I was pleased that Trent was playing songs for us that they weren't going to play later on in the show. It was like our own little bonus concert! Here's the lineup:
--Home
--The Good Soldier
--Non-Entity
--1,000,000

Here are some clips from the first three songs:

I've gotta say, Trent was kind of being a pussy complaining about the cold. Has LA thinned out your blood already, Rez? It WAS warm out! At least during the soundcheck. Once the sun set, then it was legitimately chilly.

My favorite part of the soundcheck occurred during "1,000,000." I had thought that the guys holding the guitars wanted these instruments signed, but apparently they must have asked Trent for the opportunity to smash them onstage with him. As you can see in this clip, they needed some pointers:

What an awesome opportunity for those fans, and they did an admirable job of guitar-smashing, but they kind of blew their wad early in the song, don't you think? Oh well, premature instrument destruction affects a lot of guys, I guess.

In the "1,000,000" clip, you might be able to hear Mr. Iris and me whispering to Iris, "handstamp, handstamp, HANDSTAMP!" This is because everyone with meet-and-greet handstamps was instructed to line up at the right side of the stage at the end of the song for the group pictures and not being sure how long they were going to indulge us for that, we were urging Iris to go, go, go!

They brought us up in groups of 50 to take a picture onstage with the band. Iris and Mr. Iris wound up in the first group, and here she is, walking onstage...you can see Tom Morello, Robin Finck, Trent, Justin Meldal-Johnsen, and Ilan Rubin:

Later that night, they sent us links for the group pics online. It was a bit of a wash for me personally, as the two biggest guys in the universe stood right in front of my 4'10" self, so at best you can kinda see my head. Ro fared much better, however, as Robin put his hand on her shoulder. You bitch! ;)

And Iris did even better than that, as she scored a hug from Trent himself. But I'll have her tell you all about that.

After we were herded offstage, Street Sweeper Social Club had time for a very brief soundcheck. They did one song, but we don't have video of that. But no worries...you will see more of them when we cover the concert itself!

Iris happened to see Rob Sheridan by the stage and thought we should get a picture with him. He was very nice and accommodating and posed with us with a large smile on his face until Mr. Iris (who was taking the picture) said: "Say Places Parallel!" Then his face completely dropped, and he looks totally nonplussed in the resulting picture. We're not going to post that picture or do anything to piss him off because he has WAY more internet minions than we do and because we don't want to wind up on Demonbaby. But what, I wonder, was behind his expression? We have no proof that [Trent_Reads], but perhaps [Rob_Does]. I mean, sure maybe we've had some aesthetic disagreements with Rob in the past, but we don't REALLY want to see his head roll, literally or figuratively. We're nice people and upstanding citizens, I swear! We seem to have (unjustly, in my opinion) garnered a weird reputation in the NINternet, if the Anonymi are to be believed. Hey, maybe he IS one of the Anonymi!!! Or maybe he had no idea why the fuck Mr. Iris said that.

Anyway, after that, we had a break to get some food, beverages, and merch. I can't believe I bought one more fucking NIN shirt, like I need another one! But it said "Chicago 5.29.09" on the back, and it is presumably the last one...Bah, Trent! You and your wily ways of separating me from my hard-earned cash!

Part II of our review will be posted shortly...stay tuned!

Trent Does a Good Deed! (And Will Probably Be Punished for It)

2009-05-21T14:26:00.002-05:00

Okay, we can get out of haiku mode now. Unless you want to continue.

So if you keep up with Trent's Twitter, you are probably aware that he intends to be slightly less omnipresent online, due to the well-documented fact that his fans are assholes. But what I love about Trent is that, even with the constant online harassment, he still has faith in our better natures.

Trent has taken up the cause of Eric De La Cruz, who is in critical need of a heart transplant and is getting jerked around by the travesty known as U.S. health care. You can read more about Eric here, here, and here.

What Trent has decided to do is really pretty awesome. TR sez:

"Here's what we're offering - three options:

If you have a ticket to a NIN/JA show: if you donate $1,000 to this cause, we'll invite you to come hang out with us before the NIN/JA show of your choice. You and a guest can watch soundcheck, eat dinner backstage with us, take pics / get autographs and watch the show from the side of the stage if you'd like.

If you donate $300, you and a friend can join us for soundcheck and a handshaking / hug session before doors open at the NIN/JA show of your choice.

If you do NOT have a ticket to a NIN/JA show: if you donate $1,200 to this cause, we'll invite you to come hang out with us before the NIN/JA show of your choice and provide 2 tickets (best available). You and a guest can watch soundcheck, eat dinner backstage with us, take pics / get autographs and watch the show from the side of the stage if you'd like.

100% of the money collected from this will go directly to Eric's fund."

Currently, this deal is for North American NINJA tour dates, but it sounds like Trent is considering opening this up for European shows as well? Stay tuned!

If you don't have a lot of cash to spare, I do encourage you to do pick the "I want to help" option and donate $10 to this cause, as Eric's need is life-threatening and urgent.

Iris, Mr. Iris, Ro, and I have decided to go in on the slightly cheaper option, so Trent will be plagued by our presence at an upcoming soundcheck! I'm sure that my personal encounter with him will go something like this:

Maise: Hi, Trent.
Trent: Hi.
Maise: Thank you for doing this.
Trent: Thank you.
Maise: Um, I wrote you some haikus while waiting in line.
Trent: (looking for a garbage can) Uh, okay.
Maise: (calling after Trent who is walking away) IT'S ME, TRENT! IT'S MAISE! MAISE!
Trent: Um, security?

So let's build up a LOT of excitement for this special Places Parallel encounter, as I'm sure the actual meeting will be the most anti-climactic thing ever.

Oh, and if you too are hanging out backstage or at a soundcheck, we want to hear all about it!

Happy Birthday, Trent!

2009-05-17T20:27:00.003-05:00

It's not a Places Parallel greeting card without some homemade haikus!

Happy birthday, Trent!
You're finally forty-four.
Our boy's all grown up.

I would have written
these sooner, but it was a
beautiful day out.

Cause contrary to
popular belief, I do
have a life. Sorta.

But YOU'RE the birthday
boy, so we take a moment
to celebrate you.

We hope you've had an
awesome day, free of any
inconvenience.

We hope your minions
bought you some decent presents.
No Coldplay bullshit.

We hope your Twitter
was filled to capacity
with tweets of much love.

Are you in Vegas
or something? You could go see
some Cirque du Soleil.

Or maybe you could
have a spa day! You know, like
a manly spa day.

Hope your fiancee
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah blah barf.

Anyway, I just
want to extend some happy
wishes your way, Trent.

I'm sure Iris will
photoshop something awesome
when she gets the chance.

All comments in this
thread must be in haiku, or
they face deletion.

Maise's Guide to Surviving Marriage--Lesson #1

2009-05-14T10:25:00.004-05:00

Hi, everyone!

You know, I feel like in the midst of all the brouhaha, I've really come to terms with Trent's impending marriage. I know that many of our newer readers have not, so keep in mind that *all* personal attacks on the happy couple or Iris and me will be swiftly deleted. (sigh)

Anyway...

So Trent is 11 years older than me, and he has a lot more life experience than me. He knows a lot more about music and world travel and fame and what it's like to have a few million dollars. But one thing that I do know more about is marriage, having participated in the institution for nearly nine years now. So my engagement gift to Trent is to pass on some of the wisdom that I have gained all this time through trial and error.

Today I will pass on the first and foremost and most critical lesson for anyone getting married: LEARN WHEN TO KEEP YOUR FUCKING MOUTH SHUT.

This, I think, is the most difficult of all intimate relationship skills to master, but it is also the most valuable. Learning when to keep your fucking mouth shut can prevent bitter arguments or at least keep arguments from escalating. Now, some couples enjoy having blow-out fights on a regular basis, but I am not one of those. So learning when to keep my fucking mouth shut has really helped to keep the peace between Mr. Maise and me.

Some examples:

One of the things that drives me nuts about Mr. Maise is when he has a temper tantrum related to inanimate objects. (You hear me on this, Mariqueen?) Mr. Maise starts to get all shouty about home improvement projects or video games, and my blood pressure just skyrockets. My natural impulse at these times is to say something like, "Well, if the video game is stressing you out that fucking much, maybe you should turn it off for a while!" But that's when his anger at inanimate objects turns into anger at me, and then we both start shouting at each other, and doors slam, and we have to seethe silently for a while, then eventually someone will say something innocuous to try to make up. And these spats are occasionally inevitable, but if I just keep my fucking mouth shut at these times, his anger at inanimate objects passes more quickly than would his anger at me, so we don't have to waste a nice evening pouting.

Last night was the perfect example of when to keep one's fucking mouth shut. I was tidying up the kitchen while Mr. Maise was cooking. When Mr. Maise started to scrutinize my dishwasher-loading technique, I responded with severe aggravation, "Fine! God!" Then he snapped, "What?!" Then I shouted, "STOP MICROMANAGING ME!!!!" Then we had a few moments of annoyed silence, and the fight was over. But that was because Mr. Maise wisely kept his fucking mouth shut at that moment. Later, when we were both feeling more amiable, he chuckled to himself and admitted that at the moment I exclaimed, "STOP MICROMANAGING ME!" he wanted to reply, "But you're not doing it right!" If he had said that at that precise moment, this could all have ended in a stabbing. Instead, we had a good laugh about how a long marriage teaches you to censor yourself at critical moments.

Now, keeping your fucking mouth shut is not a panacea for all of a relationship's challenges. There are times when it's actually very important to open your fucking mouth about something. Like with sex complaints. Or if your spouse is about to be run over in the street by a runaway semi. It's knowing WHEN to speak that's the trickiest part...and the most important.

I'm sure there will be more installments in this series...does anyone else have any constructive relationship tips?

Get Well Soon, Dave Gahan!

2009-05-13T09:33:00.003-05:00

Here at Places Parallel, although a dangerous NIN obsession is our bread and butter, we also like to report on other bands as well.

One of my lifelong favorites, Depeche Mode, was in the news lately for unfortunate reasons. Lead singer, Dave Gahan is currently hospitalized in Athens. I saw earlier news reports that called his condition "gastroenteritis," but according to this report, no one is saying what is wrong with him. So I certainly hope that it's not serious and that Dave recovers quickly. After all, we are looking forward to seeing him and DM at Lolla this August.

Although it may just be the latest manifestation of the mysterious "Ro Curse" on Depeche Mode. During their last tour, Ro and I and another friend had tickets to a show at the Allstate Arena, but sadly, Ro couldn't attend the show due to a sudden death in the family. Then the next time they were scheduled to appear in Chicago, Ro got tickets and eagerly awaited the show. The day of the show, she discovered that the gig had been cancelled due to Dave Gahan's contracting laryngitis. A few days later, it was announced that the show would not be rescheduled.

Now the new tour is underway, and Ro purchased her Lollapalooza 3-day pass and is eagerly awaiting Depeche Mode as the final headliner. And now Dave Gahan is hospitalized? Mere coincidence? Hmmmm...

At any rate, here is the official DM announcement on Dave's condition.

We Interrupt this Broadcast...

2009-05-08T10:36:00.002-05:00

of endless bitching and moaning about Trent to bring you IMPORTANT BREAKING NEWS:

It is our Iris' birthday today!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, IRIS!!!!!

Maise is Haunting Twitter!

2009-05-07T10:24:00.002-05:00

Welcome to the Spring of Our Discontent!

Mainly I want to get a new post up here in case NIN fans still need to express their grief. I really, really, really would prefer to discuss something else, however. I'm just lacking in material. Like Depeche Mode's new album, for example, which I still have to get.

So...yeah. I'll work on that.

In the meantime, I'm on Twitter! I realized that I need to stop tweeting Trent Reznor as my real fucking self, and I would love to friend all of you who are currently using it. So look for me here.

Meanwhile, any suggestions on new posts? I need a muse.

The Worst News of the Century...

2009-05-03T16:30:00.005-05:00

The Hindenburg. The Titanic. The attack on Pearl Harbor. The day Trent Reznor got en...I can't even say it.

Look, people, I don't know what's what. I just got back from Hawaii with a sunburn and a stye on my right eyelid, and I swam with sharks and did all kinds of cool things. I come back to read a lot of inane Twittering, Trent wanting to beat people up by the flagpole at 3, Anonymi spouting hatred over shit that's really none of their business...

Oh wait, that's right...Trent Reznor's personal life is NONE of our business!

So it's not being discussed here. Nothing to see, people. Move along. If you start getting nasty and personal, you will be swiftly deleted, as was always the rule around these parts. God knows I don't need Trent trying to PHYSICALLY find me. Also, news and gossip of this nature interferes with my personal delusions, so I'm just going to ignore it.

Besides, we've always had plenty to discuss in the past without debating the merits of those in personal relationships with Trent: his music, his concerts, his online crabbiness, his killer fashion sense, how much Billy Corgan sucks, JR's job and fountain pop, Dan's favorite thrash bands, other random shit. Let's get to it.

The Further Disintegration of Billy Corgan

2009-04-21T09:00:00.005-05:00

So I'm coming out of blogger hibernation because it's time once again for me to castigate my former hero, Billy Corgan. I don't *enjoy* calling him out constantly, but he makes it impossible not to do so!

In fact, I was actually feeling somewhat sympathetic to him after he posted a rambling explanation as to why he was going to continue working as a Smashing Pumpkin after even his right-hand man Jimmy Chamberlain jumped ship.

Well, this is the part I found kind of touching anyway, if you ignore the normal Billy pretentiousness:

"I appreciate that for many fans, the public part of my musical journey has often been quite confusing. I've tried to explain many times in both public and private venues that it's really not so different than a character on tv who embodies the role they are in. I don't think there is anything inauthentic about my play-acting within those created personas (zero, the whyte spider, the sad guy, the vampyre, etc) and acting them out on the grand stage in front of the glare of whoever cares. That to me IS what rock and roll is about. But many lack the sophistication to appreciate that just because I play a baby-faced killa upon the darkened stage that it doesn't come close to who I really am. I would point very gently to the diversity and complexity of my artistic work to give you some sense of who Billy Corgan really is (that is a joking 3rd person by the way). Part-alien, part-human, part-robot, part-star-crossed lover and part-mercury filled apparently if one was to read the songs in that way. I am a sensitive soul and I make no apologies for that. As Popeye said, 'I yam who I yam'. Or in my case maybe it's 'I am who I ain't.'"

And I mean, maybe this is all just more of Billy and his persecution complex, but as someone who has been criticizing him steadily since like, oh, 2006 or so, I can understand his frustration when people mistake the public image for the real person. If this frustration stems from his recently bitching at his audience during the Smashing Pumpkins anniversary shows, well, that's a problem all of his own making. Sure, that could be part of a "character" or "onstage persona," but it's just fucking stupid to start yelling at your biggest fans. In fact, in the same rambling blog post, he has this groundbreaking revelation:

"My wish is that from this day forward this group will represent nothing but love and light. If you see BC out there griping, it is only because I have failed to set the proper conditions to be in the love and light with you. The fan is NOT responsible in any way, shape, or form for my happiness or the my ability to do my job. (Nor have they ever been) If I have given that impression to any of you through the years I am sorry about that. That was an error on my part. When a fan comes to an SP show we owe it to you to put on the best show possible, rain or shine. I believe the days of standing on a stage somewhere in the world feeling torn about why I am up there are over. SP will be about peace from this day forward as well. The music WILL also reflect this shift in devotion and humble gratitude. You shall see!"

Well, gee, thanks Billy...that's quite a load off of my shoulders, as a fan. Okay, so my sympathy for him only goes so far. But I will say this: obviously, my criticism of Billy is criticism of the Rock Star and the Public Image and the Businessman and not the real, personal Billy who probably likes puppies and ice cream and who may just do nice things for strangers when no one is looking. That's how it is with anyone we write about on this site, even when it almost feels like we know that person. Because we don't.

But it's not like I don't have enough material with Billy The Rock Star and Public Image. In fact, he seems to be doing all he can to trash his own public image. I'm not even angry about it anymore, as a fan. I guess now I'm more curious...like, what is going on with Billy these days? Does he have a gambling addiction? An expensive blow habit? Why is he making everything about money, to the detriment of his own dignity and at risk of screwing over his biggest fans?

(Oh, and if you check out the Stereogum link above, you'll see a classic picture of Billy with Tila Tequila. Classy!)

To wit:

So after scorning bands who sell their best songs to advertising agencies, Billy has recently done just that, and I'm sure we've all seen the Visa commerical featuring "Today." Actually, I'm not all that riled up about this. Sure, sure, he explained his decision to refuse to sell "Today" for a commercial in this way:

"The record company's literally begging me: go ahead and take these commercials. At this point in my life, I don't feel comfortable. Those songs are the reason I'm alive. If your music is not sacred to the point where it's a really, really, really heavy decision about whether or not you would allow somebody else to exploit it, then what's not for sale?"

But, really, this is what every single rock star says before every single rock star winds up selling his/her songs for a commerical.

So, honestly, I could care less about that, but when you examine the Visa commercial in conjunction with every other terrible decision he's made recently, it all seems to be part of a disturbing pattern.

What terrible decisions, you may ask? Well, this one, for example:

Sure, Billy, we all liked The Wrestler with Mickey Rourke. That does NOT mean you need to start shilling for the WWE looking like Eminem with spoken-word renditions of your former hits. "You're still just a rat in a six-sided steel cage!"

And last night, I received this email from The Smashing Pumpkin, wherein he announced a subscription service. Now, I think subscription services are fine for the hardcore fans who want exclusive content, ticket presale opportunities, memorabilia, whatever. But of course, Billy has to announce a subscription service that would screw over the ones who love him most. Check out his plans, dependent of course on the interest he generates:

All of the details on this project are not concrete yet, but some information has all ready been provided.

$40 for 12 weeks. A minimum of 5 updates from the studio per week, so that's 60 updates for $40.
Updates would be posted in a less-than-24-hour consistency. For instance, if something happened on Monday, it would be posted no later than Tuesday
Each update would be a minimum of 5 minutes in length. That would mean subscribers would receive at least 25 minutes of unique audio/video material per week, and at least 5 hours over the course of the 12 weeks.
There is a possibility of live streaming video content in addition to what has been presented above.

Wait a minute...$40 for 12 weeks?! Meaning that if you had the inclination to sign up for another 12 weeks, that's another $40? Meaning that if you really loved Billy THAT much, you'd be paying him around $160 a year? We are in a recession! Is he mad? I don't even see that you get a t-shirt out of the deal!

It is certainly not my place to tell Billy Corgan that he has enough money. But I don't understand why he is allowing himself to flame out like this, when he has a large enough fanbase to comfortably pay his bills for the foreseeable future as long as he refrains from abusing us and gives us a fair shake.

Whew. Glad I got that off my chest. I'm going to try to put together another post before the husband and I leave for Hawaii on Saturday, but no promises!

Aloha!

Checking in with Places Parallel...

2009-04-12T22:17:00.004-05:00

Well it's been another couple of weeks and a whole lotta nothing is still going on but I thought I'd drop back in to share what's been entertaining me thus far this weekend.

Trent's Digg Dialog interview
You can watch it as a whole here:

Or they've convienently split it up into the individual sections by question. Several questions were pertaining to the NIN business model / distribution methods, which I would normally be all over because the "how do they do that" facinates me, but I've got an attention span of a gnat these days and this interview is 40 minutes long. He gives good arms though. For those of you who would rather just skip to the good parts I recommend checking out "most embarrassing song on your ipod" and "is there tension between Rob and JMJ on Scientology". Oh and the "what are your favorite video games" just because Mr. Iris has turned me into a bit of a gamer.

Josh Freese's $20,000 solo album
So on March 24th, Josh Freese released his solo album called "Since 1972" along with a crazy pricing scheme. What's even crazier though is that one fan with too much disposable income / allowance bought the $20,000 version which included such things as "Maynard James Keenan, Mark Mothersbaugh from DEVO and I take you miniature golfing," "I write 2 songs about you," and "Drum lesson OR foot and back massage". No doubt it would be a pretty awesome experience but doesn't this kid know there's a recession going on? I contemplated the $50 version which included a personal phone call from Josh but decided to settle for the sensible $15 copy. What would I really have to say to Josh Fucking Freese anyway? Don't be weird about it? I do have a Twitter friend who opted for the $250 copy and had lunch with the man and his girlfriend. I'm trying to get here to share her experience here with us.

Indigneous: "Broken Lands"

I bought the latest album from one of my very favorite blues-rock bands, Indigneous, and have had it on non-stop repeat all. day. long. If you're not listening to this, you should be. I've followed this band for several years but I'm always hesitant to buy new albums from them. I have three and I've loved each individual one so intensely that I'm always afraid that their next one will hit that sour note or that their sound will change just enough that it won't move me. So far, thank God, my fears have been unfounded. Mato Nanji's voice is just so smooth and it absolutely slays me along with his guitar-playing. Here's a live recording of "Come On Home" from their previous album, "Chasing the Sun". The quality is a little rough but still... *swoon*

If things work out I just might be seeing them here in a few months. Fingers crossed!

That about wraps things up for me. What has everyone else been up to?

Checking in with Trent...

2009-03-31T07:40:00.003-05:00

Thanks for the tip off Isabel. I've been immersed in the Twilight series these past two days and haven't really come up for air yet (or sleep for that matter). Two books in two days...I'm tempted to use the ole toothpick to eyelids trick today so I don't take a nap at my desk. And there are still two to go. *ack*

Don't judge me. They're additively bad, good, and hilarious from an adult point of view. Oh Bella, Bella, Bella. *shakes head*

Anyhow, check this out. It seems like a pretty cool thing for Trent to do. Anything that ups fan interaction is usually something I'm on board with. The first couple of questions seem reasonable enough. I'm too wiped to think of anything to add this morning.

3.30.09: Submit your questions for Trent to Digg Dialogg

Trent will be interviewed by Kevin Rose for Digg Dialogg, where questions are submitted by fans and voted on here. The most popular questions will be asked in the interview. Submissions and voting are open until April 4th at 12pm PDT.

Just A Quickie

2009-03-24T23:35:00.007-05:00

So I'm back from a whirlwind weekend trip to Chicago, and frankly still trying to recover from walking like 75 miles a day sight-seeing, but I just had to stop by for a minute because this is too good to not share.

Twitter + Trent Reznor = possibly the greatest thing ever.

"Have CNN on in the background and realize I'm humming the 'Jitterbug' commercial. If you've heard it - you know there's pain involved."
from TweetDeck

And the jingle he's referring to:

Sweet Jeebus. The mental image I have of him humming this little tune while dorking out with his favorite synth made me laugh so hard I snorted.

Trent, you're goddamned killing me here. When can we expect the remix?

Happy St. Patrick's Day!!!

2009-03-17T10:23:00.006-05:00

Hey everyone,

Sorry for the extended absence. You know how it goes at an office, even for ghost dogs: you take a vacation, and they make your life miserable immediately before you leave and after you return. So mainly I've been catching up this past week, but the husband and I had a wonderful time in lovely Ireland!

Pretty, isn't it? If you go to Ireland any time soon, I really recommend heading up north to Antrim. That was my favorite part of our Irish travels.

Meanwhile, on St. Paddy's day proper, I am decidely NOT enjoying the luck o' the Irish. This morning I leisurely checked my work email before showering and walking the dogs to find that the head honcho had sent out one of those group scolding emails re: timeliness that I'm sure was only meant to be addressed to like me and a couple of other people, but this company is very passive-aggressive like that. So really, I have no one to blame for myself with regard to my chronic tardiness, but it's still a bummer on St. Patrick's Day, and really, I pay this company back tenfold with unpaid overtime.

Then when I was making my morning tea, I spilled some boiling water on my fingers...ouch!

Good thing that tonight is a much-anticipated Flogging Molly concert! This L.A.-based "celtic punk" band is one of my husband's discoveries...he checked them out while Iris and Ro and I were rocking out to Saul Williams at last year's Lolla. He became an instant fan and bought a bunch of their albums, and listening to them in the car with him, I was converted as well. So although I'm not super-familar with song titles and such, I know that I will definitely enjoy this concert experience. Provided I don't get hit by a bus or some such beforehand. And I will do my best to bring you a full review sometime in the next...oh, year or so.
Unfortunately, in my rush to get out the door this morning, I forgot the camera, so no A/V goodies, but I'll do my best to steal some off of YouTube so that you get the general idea.

In other news, Trent wrote a huge anti-scalping rant, which I think is meant to deflect anger that if you see the whole NINJA package (if the whole "NINJA" name thing is not due to the pernicious and super-gay influence of Rob Sheridan, I will eat my metaphorical hat), you may be paying up to $150 for the best seats/general admission. Panic ensuing here.

Luckily for us in the Windy City, NIN will be unaccompanied by either JA or Street Sweeper, and I suspect that this is because those other two bands will be playing Lollapalooza, and there's a whole contractual thing re: when bands are allowed to play Chicago before or after the show. So our ticket prices (according to the presale, which sold out in a millisecond before Ro and I could score tickets) will be around $45. Normal Trent prices.

I must say I'm disappointed that tickets in other cities are going so high. I know, thanks to JR, that there are a LOT of factors that go into pricing, but we are in a recession, folks! I also know that there are a lot of people who would be willing to travel to multiple shows, given that it's being billed as The. Last. NIN. Show. Maybe. Not. For. Forever. But. Definitely. For. A. While. But these ticket prices are too prohibitive for those diehard fans. And...whatever, I guess. No one is forcing anyone to buy tickets or not buy tickets. If you're that diehard and poor, maybe you should settle for nosebleeds rather than not go to the show. Maybe you're pissed and want to say, fuck it, and not go at all, and I think that's a valid reaction.

I think what I'm most annoyed about are the strange venues and cities on the tour. I guess maybe it's a Live Nation thing. But I was hoping for maybe a Milwaukee or Madison show...you know, something easy to get to from Chicago, so that I could hit an extra show. But the closest they're getting is Noblesville, IN, north of Indianapolis, and eh...forget it.

So expect a lot of wailing and [gnashing _of_teeth] on NIN boards, and expect some defensive blow-up from Trent any day now over it.

(It's okay, Trent, we still love you!)

It's kind of funny because although it's cool to have NIN and Jane's Addiction on the same bill, were the two fan groups THAT interrelated that they each wanted to see ticket prices shoot up like 150% to see both acts at the same time?

Anyhoo, it's back to the proverbial grindstone for me...I'll be back soon to tell you all about the reasonably priced and festive Flogging Molly!

Fields of Gaffney

2009-02-24T23:36:00.004-06:00

guest post by Places Parallel reader, JR

Hey there.

So Maise and Iris are out of ideas, and they're dying to hear all about my holy-grail-that-is-Eric-Gaffney-performing-at-my-feet story, so I decided to set five minutes aside and whip a little something up to help them out. I'm nice like that.

If you've been paying attention, then you realize that I am a big fan of Eric Gaffney, the vastly more talented co-founder of Sebadoh - the other being the wildly overrated Lou Barlow, who is still pretty good, but not all that and a bag of chips...and who was kicked out of Dinosaur Jr by one J Mascis, who is totally dreamy and a living legend, and...where was I? Oh, right, Gaffney.

I won't drill down into the minutiae, but suffice to say that for nearly a year, Eric Gaffney and I went back and forth about him playing in my venue as a part of a new audience development initiative. I would pitch the idea, he would say no, they were no draw, no one knew who they were. I would write it off, only to hear from Gaffney two months later saying that his email address had been hijacked and that he was thinking now that it would be a good idea. Then he got into a drunken bicycle accident and had fractured like ten bones in his upper body and wasn't doing much but recuperating. When I had written him off completely, though, I suddenly received an email from him totally out of the blue, wondering about setting up a date. After all of the back and forth for more than six months, I was unsure about whether to make him a formal offer, but in the end I did and he accepted, and we had a show (it was a double bill with Edie Sedgwick).

There were some things about the show I would do differently if I had a chance for a do over, but really - that moment when Eric FUCKING Gaffney walked through the front doors of my theatre with his guitar case and asked my staff member "Where do I put this?", well...I really can't have asked for more than that. I had PMS and was pretty emotional and spent a large portion of the evening crying. Really. I was even walking around with a camera in one hand, a Kleenex in the other. JR is not afraid to show JR's emotions.

Now, for the real confession - I'm terrible at writing show reviews. When I'm there, I'm just there in the moment, and I tend to forget a lot of the details, and when it's a show at work, I'm paying a lot more attention to pretty much everything else happening. But through the magic of being JR, however, I was fortunate enough to get a recording of the entire event from the soundboard, and it's great. I promised not to share or swap it, though, so instead of songs, I give you the second best thing - stories! The FoG show was heavily punctuated by Eric's stories, and it was impossible to tell whether they were true or not, but that didn't diminish their amusing nature. (They also served to confirm the backstory that I had given him in my mind, that he is the indie rock version of Kramer. It's so totally true.) I've uploaded maybe half of them for your edification.

Before we get to the stories, though, let's take a peek at a few pictures, right?

The marquee outside my theatre; I caught Gaffney taking a picture of it on his cell phone (theatre name removed to protect the innocent).

Some staff (obscured so they won't steal the spotlight!), setting up the stage on the stage. This was a small event that took place entirely on the stage, as you'll see. We didn't use all those pesky theatre seats that you see...they were just a cool backdrop.

Eric Gaffney, looking up at the stage lights, perhaps wondering what would happen if one fell on his head during the performance. Did I mention that he was 45 minutes early for sound check?

Eric "Fields of" Gaffney on my stage within a stage. I know next to nothing about playing guitar, but he had something on this acoustic (a pickup?), that would allow him to switch it from acoustic to electric. He was actually getting some (intentional) feedback out of it, which was great. Overall, though, the performance was largely acoustic, with foot percussion (the drum in this pic is Edie Sedgwick's).

Eric Gaffney, telling one of the stories. The performance was lengthy, and as full of stories as it was of music. Most of his stories were amusing non-sequitirs. I bet you wish you were there.

This is sort of, visually, Eric Gaffney in a nutshell to me. There is something special about him; if I could read auras, I would probably see something good in his, and in this picture it's almost as if you CAN see his aura...he's just vibrating at a different frequency than other people.

Foot percussion. Yes, it's a tambourine, and he forgot his at home so we had to buy him one for the night. Since we bought it, it belonged to US not HIM, which meant that I totally swiped it after the show. I was going to take the set list, but went with the tambourine instead. I ended up with the set list, too, which came back with the recording of the night. Awww, yeah.

You might be asking, "JR, how come there is no picture of you and Eric Gaffney, both giving a thumbs up to the camera, or shaking hands like Elvis and Richard Nixon?" Well, kids, the reason for that is that it's not the nature of my relationship with him...yeah, I'm a total fan, but I wasn't in the role of fan that night, I was in work mode. We talked at the end of his set about the whole thing (and specifically about the size of the audience, how I wished it was more), and he was extremely supportive, wacky and totally cool. Exactly what you'd expect.

So, yeah, now you want to hear the stories? Enjoy.

John Cougar Mellencamp

Fields of Gaffney

Did you know that Gaffney's ex-wife is Peaches' manager?

Catharsis of Phlegm

How Kramer-like was this story? A friend named "MDR"? Remember Kramer's friend FDR, with the birthday wish?

Open D Is Tricky

Isn't it?

Or Whatever

Trucking songs!

Supposet-ly?

This one might be my favorite.

Dr. Gene Scott

Pretty sure he's talking about a televangelist (look it up on Wikipedia). This is particularly nuts out of context.

I Was Eating A Lot of Captain Crunch

Acoustic Shows

Again, Kramer..?

Lucky To Be Alive

He breaks it down right about here. (And seriously, he didn't remember it? Whoa.)

Ink Spots

Paper or Plastic

This is at the top of the show, when he whipped out the merch.

The Wolf

I like when he howls in this.

Okay, okay, I caved, and I'll include a tasting of the music that was a part of the night.

Locket Love clip (Ramones cover)

So, that's it. My dream came true.

Wave Goodbye to What You Were

2009-02-17T18:09:00.010-06:00

If you've checked in to NIN.com lately (and who are you kidding, you know you obsessively F5 like the rest of us) there's news from the Big Giant Head.

2.16.09: A note from Trent and a wave goodbye

[edited for length, click above link for full update]

In NIN world, 2009 marks the 20th anniversary of our first releases. I've been thinking for some time now it's time to make NIN disappear for a while. Last year's "Lights in the Sky" tour was something I'm quite proud of and seems like the culmination of what I could pull off in terms of an elaborate production. It was also quite difficult to pull off technically and physically night after night and left us all a bit dazed. After some thought, we decided to book a last run of shows across the globe this year. The approach to these shows is quite different from last year - much more raw, spontaneous and less scripted. Fun for us and a different way for you to see us and wave goodbye. I reached out to Jane's [Addiction] to see if they'd want to join us across the US and we all felt it could be a great thing. Will it work? Will it resonate in the marketplace? Who knows. Are there big record label marketing dollars to convince you to attend? Nope. Does it feel right to us and does it seem like it will be fun for us and you? Yes it does. Look for tour dates soon and I hope to see you out there.

Trent

Shhh...hear that? It's the sound of thousands of fangirls and boys alternately crying and bitching about this announcement. But you're not going to hear any of that from these Places Parallel girls, or at least not from me.

I am a little sad to know the end is coming, but not surprised. Trent's been hinting at this for awhile now and, really, let's add it up: ten band members have made up and/or been cycled through the band (although I'm not sure Rich Frownes [aka Jeordie 2.0] should count since he never played live with them), five years of pretty much non-stop touring, four albums released, three sites launched (The Spiral, Remix.nin.com, and a massively overhauled NIN.com), two Grammys lost, and a Saul Williams album in a pear tree. Dude's earned the right to some extended vacation time. And this might be just the kind of down time he needs to finish up some other loose-end projects **cough, cough, Ghosts Film Festival, cough, Year Zero: THE MOVIE, cough, cough** Damn...got something in my throat. My point being, TR is seldom doing nothing for long and I'm certain there will be other goodies fans can appreciate/worship/piss & moan about.

I am definitely planning on seeing NIN again before their final farewell and I'm even contemplating attending the very last show of the tour wherever that lands. Hubby is trying to talk me into Bonnaroo this year since there are a few other acts playing the festival he'd like to see. I'm not exactly sold on that idea yet. Maise and I are wondering since NIN is currently touring with Jane's Addiction if that in anyway guarantees another Lollapalooza appearance. I suppose we can only wait to see what's revealed. I've never seen Jane's Addiction live so this ought to be a treat seeing the original lineup together. Dave Navarro slightly skeeves me out but Perry Farrell is just too much fun to miss. In the dream concert I've made up in my mind Perry comes out between each NIN song to tell a fun little segue.

"Oh all my little pigs...you've been such a beautiful, beautiful audience...but I've been a baaaad boy ...oh yes, yes my little piggies...ha ha ha...YEAH...and right now...I need your DISCIPLINE"

********

"You know, I love to color . Yeah. Coloring. Little coloring books, big coloring books, I love them all. But I can never stay in the lines. No matter how hard I try, no matter how hard I focus...I just can't do it. And the more I stare it down, well, the more the lines begin to blur."

Okay, so maybe you have to be in my head to see just how goddamn funny that would be.

blindoldfreak, Toronto, 020509

2009-02-12T22:36:00.014-06:00

guest post by Places Parallel reader, Emerald

A week-long tour through Canada in the middle of February? “In what universe is this a good idea?” you might ask. Apparently, it made perfect sense to Alessandro Cortini (Modwheelmood, ex-Nine Inch Nails). Cortini is otherwise known as blindoldfreak: a man and his Buchla synthesizer.

As well fans know, he gave a lecture and performed at Concordia University in Montreal. Perhaps this is what led him to think that a Canadian mini-tour would be a good idea, but far be it from me to presume that I know what goes on in the man’s head.

The abundance of weeknight dates, as well as the distance, seemed to be prohibitive factors, and I’d resigned myself to being unable to go. I did entertain the idea briefly—I’m in Detroit, and Canada is only a bridge away—but decided in the end I just couldn’t hack it.

Until my Livejournal acquaintance Lacie, who lives on the other side of the state from me near the Indiana border, posted an entry stating her intention to haul herself and her sister Kristin to the Great White North to see everyone’s favorite Italian. This restored my hope, and I commented on the entry, stating my interest in joining her. She agreed to let me tag along, and we proceeded to plan. I also agreed to take CD and T-shirt orders from various acquaintances on nin.com and the unofficial Modwheelmood forum in an effort to spread the love.

It’s one thing to meet people from the Internet in real life, but quite another to meet them and THEN go road-tripping with them. Luckily, we all hit it off pretty much from the get-go and made good time driving through Michigan’s thumb. The only slight hitch in our harebrained scheme was when we crossed the Bluewater Bridge between Port Huron, MI and Sarnia, ON. Immigration, it turns out, wanted to have a little talk with us. It’d been a while since Lacie and Kristin were last in Canada, but my most recent trip was to Niagara Falls back in July. We were asked the same series of questions by three different officers, got our official slip stamped, and then we were allowed to go off on our merry way. The entire ordeal took up perhaps a half-hour of our time. We exchanged our greenbacks for Monopoly money and drove off into the Canadian wilderness.

After a quick pit stop in a little town called Delaware, we made it to Toronto with little trouble, marveling a bit at the sudden imposition of civilization after miles—er, kilometers of nothing and more nothing. We navigated through downtown traffic, got to the hotel, and freshened up before taking on the town. On the map , our hotel appeared to be a relatively short walk from the venue, the Drake Hotel. It was really a long, hard hike—perhaps ten city blocks at least. That’ll teach us to pay more attention to map scales.

Upon finding the venue, we decided to get something to eat that wasn’t crackers or Fruit Roll-Ups at a “Chinese-Canadian” restaurant about a block away. We still had a ton of time to kill after eating dinner, so we went to scope out the venue, only to find this embarrassing sight just outside:

We shrugged it off and entered, where we were directed by the woman at the door to kill time in the lounge until the doors opened at 8:00. We took up residence at the far end of the bar and fired up our collective Cortini-sense. (Fun fact about me: I can nurse a beer for an hour.) We saw a few guys who resembled him in one way or another, but they were all clever decoys. When Lacie and Kristin came to their second round, the waitress asked Kristin what she’d like, and Kristin paused a moment to think. The answer was quick in coming. See, after the Nine Inch Nails show in Grand Rapids back in November, Kristin started joking to Lacie that she’d like a “Cortini Martini.” The joke was too good to pass up, and so Kristin asked the bartender to mix up something martini-like but citrusy. The result is this, a crazy delicious mix of strawberry vodka, triple sec, and orange juice:

Around 7:30 or so, we decided we’d killed enough time and decided to check out the basement (also the location of the show). In the restroom, we got silly pictures of all of us helicoptering, in a homage to this pic. There I am, look at me go:

On the way out of the bathroom, I nearly got knocked over by a venue staffer opening a door. The guy explained to us that the door time had been pushed back to 9:00, and we were at a loss as to how to kill the extra time. After a short period of hemming and hawing (during which we eavesdropped on a conversation about the feud between nin.com, The Spiral, and Echoing the Sound), we left and went to the Starbucks down the street. After about 45 minutes hanging out there, chasing alcohol with caffeine, we went BACK to the venue, where we were herded into the lounge yet again by the same asshat staffer! Our Cortini-sense tingled yet again at the guy sitting behind us with headphones and a book (who does that in a bar?!), but we suspect I might have caught a glimpse of the real Cortini heading through the lobby on his way outside, phone in hand.

Finally, we were able to enter the venue. When they said it was a basement, they weren’t lying. We estimate that the headcount must’ve been around sixty or so. There was a proper stage as well as a makeshift stage set up in the middle of the floor, the highlight of which was two Buchlas (Buchlae?). Protip: The smaller of the two was Alessandro’s,

though the other one closely resembled the one featured in this video.

We immediately spotted Alessandro across the room setting up his merch and fought not to freak out too bad. There was a line of people waiting to talk to him and buy CDs and shirts, so we hung back and waited until after the first set to approach him. When I was able to hear myself think and the urge to lose my lo mein subsided, we walked over to him.

Allow me to preface the following remarks by saying that Alessandro Cortini is probably the sweetest man I’ve ever met, and unfailingly nice to everyone, as far as I could tell. He introduced himself to each of us by name with a handshake and a smile, regardless of the fact that we knew damn well who he was (in the words of Lacie, “We’re here to see you”). Lacie did most of the talking at first, asking about whether the cold had gotten to him and prompting him to explain that the Guelph show had been cancelled due to him falling ill. Kristin piped up at one point with a joke about what would happen if we messed with the Buchla’s patch cords, to which I replied, “Terrible things, terrible things,” in an effort to reassure Alessandro that nothing would happen to it, not on my watch at least. We asked about the CDs, but they were sold out (damn!), so we moved on to other business.

I handed him my copy of Modwheelmood’s Enemies & Immigrants with the opening line, "I'd like this signed for my friend [Rowan] in Scotland." She’d emailed him asking how to get a physical copy, and I went ahead and bought it for her off Amazon. I'd placed a Post-It note with her name written on it on the front. He took one look at it and said, "Oh yeah, she's the one who emailed me about getting a CD." He proceeded to explain that Buddyhead Records is basically sitting on boxes and boxes of MWM CDs which they apparently can't be bothered to send to him! I told him that I’d bought it in an effort to “expedite the process,” and he took it from me to sign, asking where would be best to do so. He ended up signing it in multiple places (he’s a lefty, for you trivia buffs out there), even taking the CD from me to write a little note to her in the liner notes: “I didn’t forget to send it to you!!”

Alessandro also signed my copy of Ghosts I-IV and got pictures with each of us. Lacie told me later that she feared I would pass out, because I apparently went white as a sheet. Judge for yourselves:

The last order of business was getting some T-shirts: “One more thing, and I swear to God I’ll leave you alone,” I promised. Those stocks were running a little low as well, so I contented myself to fill what orders I could. I handed him the money, and he saw us off with another grateful smile. I don’t know how I managed not to scoop him up and take him home.

There were two other performers before the blindoldfreak set: the first being a duo, the female half of which played an impressive but obtuse thing called “The Persephone,” and then the owner of the larger Buchla. None of the performers, Alessandro included, took the stage with any amount of fanfare, and it wasn’t until after the show that I got any indication of names and performance order. I noticed Alessandro hanging around in the crowd during both sets, getting pictures and video like any other appreciative fan.

And then it was his turn. Of all the performers, the blindoldfreak set was probably the most tuneful and concerned with musicality rather than just sound design. The show was billed as being in “quadraphonic sound,” and because I was standing between two speakers, I could feel as well as hear everything. There were no discernable songs—it was like one long song, but with transitions from one movement to the next.

It’s remarkable how much sound can come out of one machine. More remarkable still is the fact that with the turn of a knob or the press of a button, the entire mood of the room changed, and changed again. Videos, unfortunately, cannot do the experience justice. As much as I’d like to joke about how goofy the phrase “quadraphonic sound” seems, it truly added a whole new dimension to the performance. I didn’t really understand it until I moved around to get better pictures.

Also, gotta respect the dedication. He did the entire show while kneeling!

We left not long after the set, due to being profoundly tired. I wanted to say something to Alessandro as I left—after he left the stage, he was standing behind us, talking to some people. But I didn’t want to interrupt, and besides, we had a long walk ahead of us. I hope he saw my little wave in his general direction as I walked away.

We left Toronto the next morning, driving back through the Canadian bleak, but unable to shut up about how wonderful the previous night was.

You can check out more photos here and here courtesy of Em, Lacie, and Kristin. And be sure to check out Alessandro in action via some video Lacie was able to capture.

Checking in with Trent...

2009-02-09T22:53:00.007-06:00

So the photoblog portion of NIN.com is running again and Trent's been posting some teaser pictures of the band rehearsing. Tonight if you checked in though he posted a picture of what I'm assuming is him trying to prove he actually logs into NIN.com but there are those of us who know better and know what he was really checking up on.

Oh yeah, bitches. Trent reads.

Fingers Crossed

2009-02-08T16:36:00.006-06:00

So as you may or may not know NIN has been nominated for a couple of Grammys this year. Best Rock Instrumental Performance for 34 Ghosts I-IV and Best Boxed or Special Limited Edition Package also for Ghosts I-IV.

We all know Trent has never been much of a fan. Remember last year's short blurb posted to nin.com? Seems he feels the same this year as he posted on his Twitter account a few hours ago:

"... and of course, I'm NOT going to the fucking Grammys."

But who can blame him? He usually gets snubbed and so far this year, unfortunately, seems to be no exception. Rob Sheridan is currently twittering from the Grammys and we've learned that so far NIN has lost to Radiohead in the Boxed category. Such a shame because Ghosts really is an incredibly lovely set. I still keep my copy protected in the original shipping box and plastic bag it came with from any haphazard spills, pet hair, or other accidents that could ruin it. One of these days when I'm not such a slob or so accident prone, I'll put it on display. Maybe.

Rob has taken it pretty gracefully (considering his previous displays of maturity) responding to someone on Twitter who said he should have won:

"I tend to agree (as objectively as possible), but Radiohead are Grammy darlings this year so that was completely expected."

Trent also weighs in on the loss:

"Ghosts DESTROYS In Rainbows deluxe package. No debate. "

And I have to agree with him. I mean just look at them. Radiohead's kinda looks like something you would display on the fridge next to your children's other drawings brought home from school.

Whereas NIN's looks like something you'd actually want to display, perhaps in your living room under protective glass of course (remember I'm spill prone).

I think we still have a while before they get to Best Rock Instrumental Performance. Fingers crossed that NIN gets it or, at the very least, that Metallica doesn't win, although, they are rumored to be the favorites. *eyeroll*

Stay tuned...

Well fuck. NIN didn't win the other category either. It ended up going to "Peaches En Regalia", Frank Zappa. -sigh- Guess there's always next year.

The Dresden Dolls to do D.C.

2009-01-14T18:43:00.016-06:00

I recently received this email from the Dresden Dolls with some excellent news:

HOLA COMRADES!

we have the best news ever.

the dresden dolls are going to be playing in washington DC on the very historic night of barack obama's inauguration - january 20th, 2009 - in washington DC.

is this amazing?
this is so amazing.
you should come.

the event is going to be held at the 9:30 club, one of our favorite places to play EVER.

we are going to be on a bill with michael franti, talib kweli, the honey brothers (with adrian grenier), and jamie burke.

doors are at 8:00 PM.

the tickets cost $50.
presale is HERE
password RTV
public sale is thursday at 10 AM at www.tickets.com

let's start this new chapter of american - and world - history in style and with rock love.

AND.....
if you aren't already plugged into this (and you should be, aren't you on the obama mailing list?), the day before the inauguration (january 19th) is NATIONAL DAY of SERVICE.
gazillions of americans who run non-profit organizations are hosting events in YOUR area....and you probably have the day off.

from the site:
Every time our nation faces crisis, our national experience has shown Americans rise to the challenge. While government has an important role to play in helping rekindle our economy and addressing the problems of a distressed nation, President-elect Obama believes each of us, as Americans, have a responsibility to do what we can for our communities and fellow citizens. We are one nation.

check out the website and go do something awesome for your country on monday:
usaservice.org

this is it.

change starts now.

love
amanda & brian !

It's great to hear that Amanda and Brian will be playing together and I highly recommend anyone who is in the area or within driving distance to brave the weather and go, Go, GO! Watching Obama's inauguration and catching the Dolls all in a 24hour period...well, I can't think of a better way to spend a day.

Want to make your own Obama-ized picture like the Dolls at the top of this post, then check out Obamicon.Me. It's kinda fun. I think you have to register for an account to get it to work. It has also been picking up quiet a bit of site traffic lately so loading your picture could take a minute or two but it's still something definitely worth checking out.

Put Some Pants on Young Lady

2009-01-12T21:25:00.009-06:00

I'm certainly not a person anyone would describe as fashionable and I don't really keep up on the current trends so can someone clue me in as to when it became okay to wear control top pantyhose with bikini cut bottoms?

Lady Gaga, of "Christina Aguilera stole my look" fame and singer of the catchy pop song "Just Dance", seems to think this is just fine. She's donned the look once already at a New Year's Eve bash she played in New York City earlier this month. I was willing to forgive her since it was evident that she started out the night with a skirt on (although also somewhat ill advised style-wise, IMO) and it was New Year's so alcohol could partially be to blame...

...or so I thought. But then over this past weekend Miss Gaga was snapped wearing another control top ensemble. This time for a music video shoot according to Perez Hilton.

I don't mean to hate because she seems to be a lovely girl but why, why, why? She's too thin to be "doing it for the big girls" and she seems to have every other pop tart image thing going for her: young, cute, platinum blonde hair, sequined underpants, Louboutin shoes (which I do hear are stylish amongst the stars). Is this just a ploy to throw Christina off her tailored trail?

I realize our readers here at Places Parallel may not follow or care about such things but pop music is my guilty pleasure. But never Katie Perry. "I Kissed A Girl"? How very 1995.

'Almost Here' is the new 'Soon 'HERE NOW'

2009-01-06T17:35:00.014-06:00

**MASSIVE EDIT**

So Trent has unleashed his gift upon the masses and HOLY SHIT, what a gift it is!

1.7.09: your gift!
The internet is full of surprises these days.

I was contacted by a mysterious, shadowy group of subversives who SOMEHOW managed to film a substantial amount (over 400 GB!) of raw, unedited HD footage from three separate complete shows of our Lights in the Sky tour. Security must have been lacking at these shows because the quality of the footage is excellent.

If any of you could find a LINK to that footage I'll bet some enterprising fans could assemble something pretty cool.

Oh yeah, you didn't hear this from me.

posted by trent reznor at 12:56pm

400GB! 400GB!!! As badly as I would love to have all this there's no way I would be capable of downloading that much content or even know what to do with it if I did. So in the meantime I'll patiently wait for ThisOneIsOnUs.org to piece it together in a more manageable format. These are the same people that grouped together on ETS to film the last show in Las Vegas to make an unofficial DVD which will still be completed even though there's all this other "unofficial" *wink, wink* new footage coming from the NIN camp. I think I'll be picking up a copy of each of their editing efforts. Hell, I might even volunteer to help make copies.

I'm always curious and concerned with the legal side of things when Trent does stuff like this. Not that he's ever done something this massive before, but I'm talking about encouraging fans in Australia to steal his music or sneaking out "Closure" via torrents when it was caught up in corporate red tape. I mean, is playing dumb really a defense? Would the record labels have any grounds to go after him? Pardon me, I've been watching way too much "Boston Legal" lately (I've got a bit of a crush on chubby James Spader).

But let's get back to the subject at hand. You guys have heard me say it many times before but I think it bears repeating; it's good to be a NIN fan. So while the masses flood Trent's email and while I know I'll probably get my balls busted for being a fangirl, I'll still post my message here:

Thank you Trent! Thank you so much for this. You're a pretty fucking amazing guy and I'm glad that the Lights in the Sky tour will not go undocumented. It really was the most amazing stage setup I've ever seen. I don't know that this DVD will be able to capture how impressive it was but it's a start and basically all we have to work with at this point. But just because I've ineptly tried show my gratitude, doesn't mean I don't still stand by my opinion that you make for a pretty crap Santa. Christmas was two weeks ago, Mister!

Beyond that I'm at a loss for words. It's a little overwhelming. I'm sure Maise can be a bit more poetic in expressing appreciation for what Trent's doing here.

Maise, care to help me out?

/massive edit
========================================

Trent Reznor, you are a total cocktease.

1.5.09: I didn't forget

Remember that gift I mentioned?
It's almost here.

posted by trent reznor at 4:18pm

And just because you didn't forget the gift doesn't mean that you're any less of a crap Santa, Mister. Get ready to wish everyone a Merry Martin-Luther-King-Jr-mas.

The Words "Pete Doherty" and "Hottest" Should Never Appear in the Same Sentence

2008-12-28T09:21:00.010-06:00

Hm, when exactly was it that Christmas turned from a cherished childhood tradition into an extended military campaign? I think, for me, it was when the husband and I bought a house. Then someone in my family said something along the lines of "Why don't we have Christmas at YOUR house?" And I, underestimating the daunting task ahead, said, "Sure." So this turned into me at the last possible minute (because despite the approaching holidays they still expect one to work full-time) cleaning the whole house from top to bottom, decorating, buying and wrapping gifts, baking multiple types of cookies (as I have been the designated family baker for years now as well), picking up my mother from Indiana, taking her to church, and then putting my mom and husband in charge of dinner because by the time people actually arrive to celebrate the holiday I am on the verge of collapsing from exhaustion and/or a migraine. And everyone has SO much fun that Christmas at my house becomes another family tradition, and I have to go through this every year now.

(Conversely, New Year's transforms from watching Dick Clark on TV with your parents, drinking sparkling grape juice and going straight to bed at 12:01 into something considerably more interesting in adulthood. So there's that compensation at least.)

So that's why things have been quiet on the Maise front over here at PP. But I just had to post when I saw that the readers of NME have voted on "The 20 Hottest Men in Rock." (Quotation marks both to signify the title of an article and for ironic purposes.)

Of course, a certain someone we know is TOTALLY FUCKING ROBBED, and it is one of the great injustices on the internet, but I think these NME readers must be of a certain age and must be into a certain genre of music. You know, the kind where the guy threatens to steal your jeans. (barf)

So I'll comment on several of their choices:

I guess if I had to be stranded on a desert island with any of their picks, I'd go with the Kaiser Chiefs' Ricky Wilson, but only because he has certain Gabriel Miller-esque qualities that make my heart go all pitter-patter:

But in general, as noted on Jezebel, pretty much all of their choices look exactly like this guy:

(Alex Turner, Arctic Monkeys)

I mean, it's not that I don't like skinny, pale English guys...Damon Albarn, YUM...but I think I'm just too much of a child of the '90s to embrace these anemic, anorexic hipster indie/emo types. I mean, most of them just look either too hungry or snobby to want to go to bed with a girl.

Now this guy on the other hand actually has actual qualities of sexiness, although I'm not too familiar with Muse, other than the singles I've heard on the radio, which are okay:

(Matt Bellamy)

As does this guy:

(Jared Followill, Kings of Leon)

Meanwhile, I don't think it's possible for them to provide a worse picture of Jack White of the White Stripes and Raconteurs:

And THIS is just fucking inexplicable:

Who the fuck wants to fuck sweaty, scabby old Pete Doherty? Okay, NME readers, you guys have fun recreating the withdrawal scene from "Trainspotting" with Pete. You can lovingingly caress his collapsed veins and open sores. Then, maybe when he passes out, you can steal his wallet or something. I mean, to each his/her own, but goddamn.

You can see all of NME's skin-and-bones, melanin-deprived picks here.

Happy holidays!

Good News & Bad News

2008-12-13T23:42:00.005-06:00

A few weeks ago Trent hinted at, but did not elaborate on, a change up not only for the stage production but also the current lineup as we now know it. Good news is that Robin is definitely NOT going anywhere. Bad news is that it can now be confirmed that Alessandro Cortini, along with Josh Freese, will be leaving the band after the first of the year.

From blindoldfreak.com, one of Alessandro's side projects, he posts:

thank you.

December 13, 2008

It’s been exactly 4 years since i joined Nine Inch Nails and the time has come for me to move onto new things.
I feel a need to explore other paths in music and life which leads me to leave the tour at this stage.
I am grateful of the chance i was given: it doesn’t happen every day to be able to work next to some of the most talented people on this planet.

Trent & Co. have been aware of this decision of mine for a while now and are prepared to take the band to the next step.

Thanks to all the fans who welcomed me at the beginning of my journey and supported me through the years: I hope to see you around here or there.

Alessandro

And from Josh Freese's MySpace blog:

Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Why I'm leaving Nine Inch Nails
So, I've been wanting to write something for a while now explaining why I am leaving Nine Inch Nails at the end of the year. Not that it's THAT big of a deal or important compared to other real shit going on out there in the world but I figured I'd take a minute out to explain anyhow. I know a few people are aware that I'm having my 3rd child in January and basically....that about SUMS IT UP!

I've just been gone too damn much lately and if I hadn't spent so much time on the road in recent years (between NIN, A Perfect Circle, Devo, Sting, The Vandals) coupled with having 3 kids (come January) then I'd still be out on the road in the new year. It's just that the rate that NIN has been touring (and will continue to tour in 2009) is something that I can't keep up with right now. My kids need their Dad around and I want to be around for them. I am definitely not retiring or "done touring" by any means though. I just need to be home a bit more next year.
I am not leaving because I got a better offer from another band or because I don't enjoy it.....it's one of my favorite situations I've ever been involved with and I already miss it (though we still have 5 more shows to play).

If you saw a NIN show in the past 3 years then you'll know that to say I LIKE playing up there is an understatement and that I give it my all every night. It's much more than a "job" or a "gig" for me. I'm a big believer in Trent and his music and feel fortunate and privileged to have had the chance to work along side of him and be a part of what he does for the past three years. It is something I am truly proud of and he makes most the other ones out there feel pretty small time. I have faith in the notion that we'll work together again at some point, in some fashion. But for now I need to go teach my 7 year old boy how to ride a bike.....nothing can really compare to that (except maybe an all night hotel coke session with some hookers.)

Josh

While it's nice to know that both are leaving on good terms, unlike the blowout with jeroME that landed Josh the job in the first place, they are leaving some big shoes to fill. Alessandro...Josh...it's been great watching you guys do your thing with Nine Inch Nails and you will be missed.

**EDIT**
Here's some video from the show last night in Vegas of Trent's speech to the audience.

And here's an interview conducted pre-show by a fan from the website Pink Is The New Blog. This is seriously one of the best Trent Reznor interviews I think I've ever watched. Subjects include end of the tour, what's to happen after, Trent's music listening habits, old videos that have surfaced via YouTube, and, what Maise will probably think is the best part of the whole thing, missing his dogs at home. Kudos to the boys who put it together for asking good questions and reasonably maintaining their cool. Enjoy.

Trent Reznor Interview, 12.13.08
by trentisthenewpink

Oh and if you're wondering about the link under the video (Trentisthenewpink) it's not a reference to El Rez. Just so happens that the kid who runs the site is also named Trent.

Checking in with Trent...

2008-12-13T12:43:00.006-06:00

12.11.08: Regarding NIN music used at Guantanamo Bay for torture

It's difficult for me to imagine anything more profoundly insulting, demeaning and enraging than discovering music you've put your heart and soul into creating has been used for purposes of torture. If there are any legal options that can be realistically taken they will be aggressively pursued, with any potential monetary gains donated to human rights charities. Thank GOD this country has appeared to side with reason and we can put the Bush administration's reign of power, greed, lawlessness and madness behind us.

Trent Reznor

And from one of our own readers:

I'm sorry for saying this here but I fear if I say it on nin.com I'll be blacklisted but Trent has really annoyed me with his latest bit of political grandstanding (about 4 years too late) - his latest comments on Guantanamo Bay - [see above]

Really Trent, what about pregnant women being murdered to start race wars like Sharon Tate? I'm surprised he doesn't break into Guantanamo and nick someone's slipper as a 'really cool momento' like he did her door. He's also been known to say that he'd watch a snuff movie - so apparently on his list of outrages he'd care about, fundamentalist religious madmen are right up there - but pregnant women and poor innnocents tortured for the edification of rich men who want to wallow in the darkness are right at the bottom! Bah, sorry I had to get it out and I really want someone to say something to mitigate what I think is deep hypocrisy - because I do love his music but think sometimes he really should just shut up (you know what you get if you wallow in darkness for years, someone using your music for torture) - I'm really sorry to rant.

Now I'm not going to try and slay our reader here because I do think she has a right to be upset with Trent to a certain degree. He has been known to be a hypocritical ass in the past to lesser charges and I'm sure anyone of us could name multiple instances where we wished he'd shut the fuck up but I think he's got a legit reason for his public outcry on this one. True, he may not have the most pristine track record for saying no to violence having admitted to watching snuff films and, hell, even making the "Broken" movie might make one think that this sort of action is right up Trent's alley BUT I think there's a slight difference between a morbid personal curiosity and having something you created be actively used in the present day for the torture of others in the manner in which the US Government is doing so.

Was it the most mature or politically correct thing to keep a door from the Sharon Tate house as a memento? Probably not. But to say that he has no right to be appalled at this recent discovery and that he should instead just shut up is is something I'm going to have to disagree with you on. Actually I would be upset if he hadn't said something about this. Staying silent would be, to me, the same as condoning it.

I am curious how others feel about this, whether it be about our reader's comment or the situation in general, and encourage further discussion. I'm not out to slay anyone in their opinions unless, of course, you agree with bassist Stevie Benton of Drowning Pool (refer to pg2 of article linked above) who believes this to be "an honor." In that case, it is my civic duty to inform you that you are indeed retarded. That is all, for now.

The Hand that Feeds Amanda Palmer--Part II

2008-12-08T11:43:00.012-06:00

Okay, so I needed some time to catch up on work and wanted to wait until we had all our audio-visual material uploaded, so that I can provide suitable examples, but now I can tell you all about The Coolest Thing the Places Parallel Girls Have Ever Done, Seriously.

So, on Wednesday, December 3rd, I weaseled my way out of work early, and Iris and I packed up all the food (in our Glad family of products...I felt just like a contestant on Bravo's Top Chef!) and a crock pot, just in case the Metro was poorly equipped, and we set off in a light but traffic-jamming snowfall to the Metro on Clark Street in Chicago.

Now, the Metro is located very near Wrigley Field, which is a notoriously rotten area to look for any sort of parking, but we were very fortunate to find an open meter just across the street from the venue. We were early, so we took to a bar for some liquid courage, as we were both feeling pretty nervous at this point.

But we arrived promptly at the doors of the Metro at 5:30, as requested. Steve, our contact, happened to be waiting outside, and he had us wait just inside the lobby for Kat, another member of the Danger Ensemble, who would escort us backstage.

The Metro is a tiny venue, so it's not surprising that the artists have a tiny area to themselves backstage. The walls are painted all black, and there is some curious decor:

All sorts of people were already backstage...including Amanda Palmer (gasp!) who was sitting in a recliner, being videotaped by someone. It was hard to tell who was who...performers, fans, etc., and to tell the truth, it was all pretty intimidating. Kat led us into a room that was loaded with food brought by fans, and I sheepishly realized that I could have probably gotten away with bringing hummus and pita. I asked her if there was any kind of microwave, and to my infinite disappointment, she said there was not. Seriously, Metro? You can get a microwave at Target for like $60. Kat assured us that it would be okay if the food were cold, but we strongly recommended that we go back to the car to get the crock pot and at least heat up the soup. But inwardly, I was fretting because the tacos would remain cold, and who really wants a cold veggie taco? In addition, although crock pots are very handy for keeping things warm, they're not exactly known for their speed in reheating things, so I then became The Girl Who Neurotically Fussed Over the Crock Pot for 90 Minutes. The only open space for said crock pot was right in front of a mini-fridge, so I was also The Girl Whose Fucking Crock Pot was in the Way of People's Cold Bottles of Water. Oh, why, I inwardly lamented, why didn't I just think to bring hummus and pita or sandwiches, like this guy Chuck who sat on a couch with his Sullen, Silent Female Companion? (Although I have to give props to Chuck for providing me with a ladle.)

The fans who provided food all sort of huddled together silently and terrified in a corner of the room. It was an awkward atmosphere, let me tell you, although it was also very interesting to be a fly on the wall backstage. I wish I could tell you that I was cool, but I'm not cool. I'm a total fucking dork, and when confronted by people I like and admire, my brain function decreases by a good 40%. When Amanda strolled by, doing her vocal exercises, my conversations with her were completely profound and scintillating, like this:

Me: So, did you get to enjoy Chicago at all today?
Amanda: No.

Amanda (lifting up lid of tacos): Mmmm, this smells good!
Me: Yes, they are veggie tacos.

(Note: I didn't actually see her consume any of my food, as she didn't want to be "too full" for the performance, which is understandable, especially since my food was very bean- and lentil-heavy.)

Nope, nope, nothing like "'Leeds United' is the most amazing song" or "The first Dresden Dolls album helped me survive a very difficult time in my life" (cheesy, but true) or any of the things I'd actually want to say if I were theoretically to encounter Amanda Palmer.

Also, she was doing warm-up exercises and flitting around here and there, and although we probably could have made her pose for pics or do silly videos, and I'm sure in her extreme generosity, she would have gladly obliged, but Iris and I were both struck by the desire to let her prepare for the show and relax in peace. So our documentation of our time backstage is, unfortunately, limited to some pics we took on the sly:

Although dreadful performance art group, Pony Spread, kindly posed for a picture with us. (I'm sure they're wonderful people beyond their dreadful performance art):

But Iris did get a chance to present Amanda with a t-shirt that she had made for her. As you may know, Amanda's had some problems with her record label lately. Among other issues, they criticized the appearance of Amanda's TOTALLY not fat stomach in the "Leeds United" video, sparking the online "Rebellyon," wherein fans have been posting pictures of their own less-than-whippet-taut bellies as a "fuck you" to the execs at Roadrunner Records. Anyway, in one of Amanda's blog posts, in response to the controversy, she threatened the life of a My Little Pony. Therefore, in Iris' t-shirt, the ponies get their revenge.

Amanda was delighted with the shirt and started showing it off to people, whereupon Iris' head exploded with joy, which was a little messy, but it was worth it.

So they had us hanging out awkwardly backstage for about 90 minutes, and then they informed us that it was time for the show! Now here comes the glowing part of this review. I mean, I'm not a professional rock critic, so I basically pay money to see the artists that I like, and more often than not, I like it. So the haters can suck my metaphorical balls if they're not happy to hear that this show fucking rocked our faces off!

First up were The Builders and the Butchers. It takes a very special opening band to get me enthused, as many times I view opening bands as my punishment for arriving early. But this indie group from Portland, Oregon, is more than up to the task, with their heavy percussion, use of eclectic instruments (banjo, accordion, mandolin, etc.), audience participation (at one point, the lead singer passed out maracas and tambourines, so that audience members could play along), and infectious melodies. A lot of reviewers label their music as "dark folk" or "reminiscent of gospel," but it reminded me a lot of Irish rock, like Flogging Molly, but without the accents.

This is one of the few times that an opening band had me enjoying every note, as opposed to checking my watch and shifting my weight from my left to right foot, killing time before the opening act. I wish that their set wasn't so short, and I'm looking forward to their next appearance in the Windy City.

Next up was the amazing solo cellist, Zoe Keating. This woman is extremely coordinated, as she handled all the pre-recorded parts on her laptop herself during her performance. Her music is like the most mesmerizing, mournful soundtrack to all the movies in your head:

Zoe Keating is an amazing musician, with incredible poise, even when her computer crashes on her. ANOTHER opening artist that I didn't want to see leave the stage.

Then...we had Pony Spread. Like I said, I'm sure they're nice folks, and maybe it's just my personal bias against some of the more esoteric forms of expression, but I HATE HATE HATE the performance art segments of Dresden Dolls/Amanda Palmer shows. They had a Christmas-themed performance for us during which impish reindeer simulated masturbation, Santa was crucified, a girl was persecuted by women dressed like the Virgin Mary(?), the reindeer and the Virgin Marys attempted to force Santa to rape the girl, but they were thwarted by a woman dressed all in black who was the girl's true love or something, and Santa blessed their relationship, and it all ended happily ever after or some shit. I mean, I guess I just wish it wasn't so cliched...I mean, crucifying Santa? Zzzzzzzzzzz...give me more Zoe Keating.

Next, we had...oh NEIL FUCKING GAIMAN read a "eulogy" for Amanda Palmer IN PERSON. NEIL FUCKING GAIMAN! Apparently, he and Amanda are working on a book together to accompany the whole "Who Killed Amanda Palmer?" murder mystery that I couldn't keep up with online. Hopefully it will all show up in the book, and we'll know who killed her in the end too.

Amanda came onstage in her usual dramatic fashion and opened with the infinitely awesome "Astronaut." Seriously, I'm, like, fucking OBSESSED with this song these days. And watching the video again gives me goosebumps.

Onstage, she was accompanied by the Danger Ensemble, backup dancers and performance artists who do it right (take note, Pony Spread). They managed to be thought-provoking and convey their interpretation of the music without being obtrusive.

Pretty much anyone who's into the Dresden Dolls would enjoy Amanda's solo work, and she's never less than electrifying onstage, banging violently on her piano, her leg flying beneath her. I'm probably more of a fan of her uptempo songs: "Runs in the Family," "Guitar Hero," and the superb "Leeds United," all of which made an appearance in the setlist. The one songwriting weakness of Amanda Palmer, I'm afraid, is that she's got just a few too many songs that sound like this:

But I do enjoy the lyrics of "Ampersand":

"The ghetto boys are catcalling me
As I pull my keys from my pocket
I wonder if this method of courtship has ever been effective
Has any girl in history said 'Sure, you seem so nice, let's get it on'
Still, I always shock them when I answer, 'Hi, my name's Amanda'

And I'm not gonna live my life on one side of an ampersand
And even if I went with you, I'm not the girl you think I am
And I'm not gonna match you, 'cause I'll lose my voice completely
No, I'm just gonna watch you, 'cause I'm not the one that's crazy..."

Or maybe I'm the only one who identifies with that, in a way. Anyway.

One of my favorite songs of the evening was one co-written with Neil Gaiman: "I Google You," which is meant to be an Ella Fitzgerald/Frank Sinatra standard for the internet age. We've got a portion of this recorded, but unfortunately, our nemesis for the evening, a particularly zealous Metro security employee, kept zeroing in on Iris (despite the HUNDREDS of other people taking photos and videos) and forcing her to stop recording:

Because of Our Nemesis, we are not able to bring you video of the chilling ode to school shooting, "Strength Through Music," the rousing "Guitar Hero," the playful lip-synching to Rihannna's "Umbrella," or the climactic, infectious closer, "Leeds United, complete with horn section.

Amanda was available to sign merch after the show, but we eschewed the long lines and made our way backstage to get our coats, signed posters, crock pot, etc. During the whole show, I had been brooding about the culinary disappointment of the evening...that I couldn't even get my damn soup sufficiently reheated. But then! Like a Christmas miracle, when we stepped backstage, we could smell the delicious, comforting aroma of my soup in all its glory. The crock pot had finally brought the soup to its optium temperature, and I started getting all kinds of compliments! Kat from The Danger Ensemble enjoyed a bowl, and the horn section were *particular* fans. I felt so vindicated and overjoyed, I can't even tell you. I hope that Amanda and the gang got to enjoy the leftovers as well as heat up the tacos in their microwave on the bus because seriously, those are some upscale veggie tacos...made with tawny port!

One of the horn players kindly provided some video testimonial with regard to the awesomeness of my soup (of which he consumed multiple bowls), but unfortunately, he uses my real name in the video, so it's not going up here. But trust, people...it was a success!

Iris and I left the Metro that night absolutely thrilled. We had had a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to cook for one of our favorite musicians, hang out backstage, and then see a kickass show that we'll always remember. So when the Amanda Palmer Experience rolls into your town, I can of course, recommend it, and I'd like to add that it's well worth it to bust out your wok, Cuisinart, baking pans, crock pot, what have you, to feed her as well.

The Hand that Feeds Amanda Palmer, Part I

2008-12-03T10:56:00.005-06:00

So as a faithful fan of Amanda Palmer and the Dresden Dolls, I am of course on their mailing list. And towards the bottom of Amanda's U.S. solo tour announcement, I saw a curious plea:

"FOOD: you CAN help us with THIS....two different ways, even... feed me, The Danger Ensemble and our crew when the show hits your town! we had wonderful luck on the european tour, now it's time to try this in the states and we're getting ORGANIZED, baby.

we works hard. we tours. we's is hungry. we needs sustenance. we needs good food sourced from righteous places, prepared by YOU. we are hungry for HOMEGROWN ingredients: local, organic, sustainable, grown by family farmers or grown by YOU! yes!

the way this works: you bring food for us, we'll keep it backstage, we'll all perform, then we'll eat (with you, of course) after the show. obviously we'll hook you up with tickets and merch if you do this. and cover you with love, and probably give you some beer, and toast to the health of you and your progeny.
veggie options a huge plus, but most of the crew are carnivorous.
jason and i are both pescetarians (aka vegaquarians, aka fish-eating) kat from the danger ensemble will be your point person, but steven will be fielding the emails.

send to steven@amandapalmer.net and format your email like this:
FOOD: CITY. he'll pass it along to kat."

I like the people in my life to feel nurtured and well-fed, so I decided to answer this clarion call. I emailed the aforementioned Steve and offered up two of my favorite recipes: Giada De Laurentiis' Spicy Italian Bean Soup (chock-full of hearty veggies) and soft vegetable tacos with a tasty tawny port sauce. Dan will note that these recipes are not only delicious but also vegan-friendly (assuming you skip the cheese and use vegetable stock in the soup, of course).

So I waited and waited and waited for a reply, wondering if I was going to be called to cook for the December 3rd show at the Metro tonight in Chicago. Finally, last Sunday, I received a reply from Steve:

"This sounds awesome if still availabile.. let me know if you can.. but basically the deal is.. if it's possible for you.. come to the venue at 5:30 the night of the show (ask for Kat from The Danger Ensemble) and then 1 of 2 things usually happen : either we bring the food into the venue and you witness the craziness that is backstage at that time of day - which usually includes people running in and out and not really have time to chat.. people being incredibly grateful for the food you've given us and all of us trying to have a moment to connect with you.. or the food goes on the bus and we eat it after the show.. then we try to find a time to introduce you to Amanda and if that can't happen before the show (sometimes as a result of press and soundcheck times) I will introduce you to her during the signing and make sure she knows that you are the one who so generously fed us. When possible we love to eat with people but as I've discovered on the european tour that isn't always possible depending on venue policy and blah blah boring..

I think that's really everything.. oh.. except where possible - if the food is able to be transported in vessels and things that you don't need returned to you like takeaway boxes etc that usually makes things easier..

We will also hit you up with a some merchandise to say thank you.

Let me know if you are still keen to do this and thank you so much!

Love S."

I excitedly reported this news to Iris, who made some hasty arrangements to get some time off. Then yesterday, I set about purchasing ingredients, making my kitchen sanitary for food preparation purposes, and cooking, cooking, cooking!

Fortunately, the cooking part went well, I thought. I mean, I've made both of these recipes before, to rousing success, but it's nervewracking to cook for a stranger whom you admire! I was not told how many people I'm supposed to be cooking for...I would presume that several fans are contributing to the potluck, so I made one big batch of the soup and a double batch of the tacos. Will they be able to properly reheat the food backstage on the Metro, or will they have to use the microwave on the bus? Who knows?

I had neurotic visions of burning the shit out of onions and peppers at like midnight, when I would be near my breaking point. Or maybe I would be sitting in the middle of a dirty kitchen, overwhelmed and paralyzed. But I actually found it all quite enjoyable. And these recipes really couldn't be simpler...it's just time-consuming to chop everything up.

So I hope that Amanda and the Danger Ensemble and Crew enjoy the food...it was made with a lot of love! We will have lots to share with you soon! In the meantime, let's trade some favorite recipes in this thread!

NIN in Cedar Rapids, IA--11/20/08

2008-12-02T10:36:00.005-06:00

So this review is only slightly delayed due to the holiday and the debilitating bout of bronchitis and a sinus infection that I endured in true martyred, moaning-and-groaning-and-leaving-used-kleenex-everywhere fashion. But I am still excited to tell you all about this show because it ranks very near the top of all-time favorite NIN performances, and I've seen quite a few at this point. It is not only worth seeing when the tour rolls into your town, but it was definitely worth crossing state lines and driving on VERY long stretches of I-80, surrounded by cows and cornfields.

We reported to the U.S. Cellular Center in Cedar Rapids, IA, at the appointed time. I don't know if Iowa crowds are particularly tough, but to be admitted, we had to experience the most thorough and gruelling personal search for contraband outside of being arrested. We were subjected to the typical patdown and purse search, of course, but I wasn't expecting the strict, but otherwise friendly, staff members to insist on inspecting my beltline and the tops of my shoes. Cameras were verboten, but Iris managed to sneak hers in under a layer of used, diseased kleenex.

Sadly, tragically, heartbreakingly...the batteries in her camera as well as her spare batteries were on the verge of an untimely death. So we do not have as many A/V goodies for you this time, but Mr. Iris saw our dejected faces and came to the rescue...acting as the Battery Whisperer and somehow keeping the camera going far longer than we would have expected. Apparently you can keep dying batteries charged up just a little by warming them in your hand! That's our science lesson for today, kids. Seriously, though, we are extremely grateful to Mr. Iris for keeping hope alive, and he's the whole reason we do have some video clips to present to you.

Other than the arduous strip- and full-body-cavity searches, I think U.S. Cellular is a great concert arena. It's large enough that tickets will be readily available for most shows, but you don't feel miles away from the band. They have a General Admission area on the floor, of course, but I also appreciated the General Admission concourse area overlooking the floor, but with arena-style seating. From this perspective, we were actually able to see the stage and the terrific production, which really makes all the difference if you're going to see the Lights in the Sky tour.

Our opening band that evening was Japanese experimental trio, Boris. Now, Trent picks opening bands that either become my favorite bands (Saul Williams, Ladytron, The Dresden Dolls) or bands that I tolerate at best (Queens of the Stone Age, Moving Units). This time he outdid himself with Boris. I don't have words to convey my hatred for this dull, overly loud, tuneless, droning jam band, so here's a picture of my dog:

Ahhhh, that's better. Now I feel my blood pressure going down. On to the main act!

The setlist we had was very similar to that we heard at Lollapalooza. But what a difference the change in venue makes! Not having to compete with Kanye West for volume is a definite plus. But indoors, the music can envelop you, mesmerize you, and speaking of mesmerizing...oh my God, those screens!

Trent obviously spared no expense on these toys, and it really enhances the entire show. Even songs that rabid NIN fans have heard 7,000,000 times in concert are greatly enhanced by the stunning visuals. Take the obligatory "Closer," for example. The ladies will appreciate that when Trent sings the chorus, he snarls into the unblinking eye of a camera, and projected 100 times larger than life onto the screen is what I can only refer to as the "Trent fucks you cam." He also employs this camera during "The Greater Good," as I recall. I could only reflect on how much I miss Wearing These Chains' Dierdre as I looked upon all the super-close-up shots of Trent's ferocious teeth. But it's not just all admiring Trent's tortured visage...for "Only," a large screen in front of the band flickers static that is broken up whenever Trent approaches the screen. Unearthly landscapes shimmer during the "Ghosts" instrumentals.

Here are some brief clips of some of the songs I mentioned. Unfortunately, zooming in strained the camera's batteries to the breaking point, so this is the best we can do. Better than nothing, right? Besides, I really think you need to experience this show for yourself...videoclips don't quite capture the saturated colors and the special effects in all their glory:

Trent did a nice mix of the old and the new...and as controversial as Year Zero was as an album and a concept around these parts, all of those songs sound great live. He's really putting so much energy into "Survivalism," it's one of the songs that I really look forward to hearing.

When you go see this show, and you really must go, you can expect to hear most of your old favorites: "Gave Up," "March of the Pigs," "Wish," "Head Like a Hole," etc. But Trent and co. do not shortchange the new songs, even though we all got The Slip for free. Here they are, playing "Echoplex":

Not sure what the deal is with Josh Freese playing Vanna White at the beginning of that song. But anyway.

Trent was in a pretty good mood--no microphone-throwing tantrums, although I suspect those days have largely passed him by. I think all of the bandmembers are starting to get a little tired of being on the road, if this speech is any indication:

Immediately after that, Trent introduced the lineup by saying, "And now I'd like to introduce you to the guys I'm sick of...just kidding," he halfheartedly added. Here's hoping that they all get a nice holiday break because I really like this lineup. Sure, the ever-competent and amazing Josh Freese is, as Fleetwood Mac would say, going his own way. But oh my God, is Robin Finck ever an improvement over the showboat-y Aaron North!

The show ended on a poignant note with "In this Twilight." As the screen projected scenes of explosions above an evening cityscape, each band member got a moment to take a bow and walk offstage.

Now, you all know that I'm Trent's ultimate cheerleader (and some would probably say "apologist" or "sychophant,"--WHATEVS!), but as I said before, this is really one of my all-time favorite NIN shows, and I'm really hoping that he can make one more stop in Chicago before sequestering himself to create the next album. (Or at least make a DVD out of this tour, asap.) Although it was a pretty awesome birthday present to see him in Cedar Rapids.

And, as always, more pics to be found here.

You know, I'm not sure how I feel about the adequacy of this concert review, but that's because I'm STRESSED OUT. Do you know why I'm STRESSED OUT? Because tonight, I need to slave over a hot stove so that tomorrow evening I can feed The Danger Ensemble and AMANDA PALMER when she plays a solo show at the Metro. No, seriously. Iris is making the long drive yet again, and we will be documenting as much as humanly possible. With lots of brand-new batteries this time! Stay tuned...

Currently Absorbing: Melody Gardot

2008-11-26T22:35:00.007-06:00

For a momentary change in pace from the usual music we promote around here, I present Melody Gardot. What? We're not always all NIN, all the time. Anyway, I've been listening to her album, "Worrisome Heart", all night and I just can't get enough. Sweet and soulful, a mix of blues and jazz that for tonight I can only describe as "perfect".

You know how there are some albums you have to listen to a few times before they really sink in and then there are those that you just feel it from your head to your toes the first spin through? This album definitely falls into the latter category. It's the kind of music that has inspired drunken emails to friends at 3am. I'll share more about the song that was in reference to another time. For now though, grab a glass of wine (or non-alcoholic beverage of choice) and sit back and enjoy. And if you want to read a little background on on Melody, this is a great article.

Have a safe and Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! We should have our Cedar Rapids NIN show review posted here "soon" so stay tuned!

On the Road Again...

2008-11-18T16:40:00.004-06:00

Ro and I are heading out to our neighboring state of Iowa to visit Iris tomorrow, and we'll be seeing NIN in Cedar Rapids just in time for my birthday!

I've never been to Iowa, but I imagine the drive will look a lot like this:

So although we'll be absent for the next couple of days, I'm sure we'll have plenty to report upon our return.

In the meantime, you can use this thread to do what you guys do best...

It Must Be Pointed Out...

2008-11-10T12:06:00.003-06:00

So given that Sasha and Malia will be moving into a Presidential fishbowl, I fully believe that they should be able to pick the puppy they've wanted for so long. However, just in case the Obamas weren't aware of all of the options...

(photo courtesy of Barbara Karant)

I mean, come on...how HOTTT will Barack look walking a sleek greyhound? Sure, get the girls their goldendoodle puppy, but the White House is pretty big. There's room for more than one dog, right?

Retired racing greyhounds make wonderful pets. I currently have two (and would probably have at least a couple more if I had the room in my house); they are among the great loves of my life, and they have turned me into a greyhound adoption activist. The breed isn't for everyone, to be sure, but a lot of people either have just never considered one or have some misconceptions:

1) They won't necessarily eat your other pets...it really depends on the individual dog, and it depends on the dog's "prey drive." Some greys should not be around smaller dogs, cats, birds, small animals, etc. Other greys will be happy to curl up with your kitty or will even make friends with your pet rabbit, although with the latter, I would NOT recommend unsupervised conduct. They are a hunting dog and do have an instinct to chase. But again, it depends on the individual dog's temperament, and a good rescue organization will check to see if a greyhound is "small dog-friendly" or "cat-tolerant." My husband and I have two chinchillas. I NEVER leave them out of the cage, unsupervised, with the dogs. However, our dogs pay almost no attention to the chinchilla cage and will even take a nap in the same room without bothering the chins. Even Anubis, who wants to chase every squirrel and bunny he sees outside.

2) A greyhound's ability to get along with small children really depends on the individual dog...just like with every other breed. Through my work with Cleo and Anubis' adoption group, I've met many families with children and greyhounds, and everyone seems to get along just fine. A lot of it has to do with supervising kids' contact with ALL pets and making sure that a curious toddler doesn't molest a pet beyond its tolerance level.

3) They do not need any more exercise than any other dog. Some people believe that you need to walk greyhounds for hours and hours...they're racers, right? Actually, greyhounds are sprinters and can only maintain their incredible speeds (up to 45 mph!) for short periods of time. Greyhounds do need exercise and walks, like any other dog, but mine are happy with two 30-minute walks a day. They enjoy longer walks, of course, but they aren't bouncing off the walls if you don't provide them. Which brings me to my next point...

4) Greyhounds are LAZY. A lot of people, again, assume that because they are racers, they must have lots of energy. Well, from what I've seen over the past two years, greyhounds can sleep up to 20 hours a day, and what they most want in the world is a soft bed or couch to curl up on. The largest grey has a lot more in common with a housecat than a Jack Russell terrier, which really will bounce off the walls without tons of exercise.

5) They are larger dogs, but they have longer lifespans than many big breeds. 12-14 years is the average. Hopefully mine will live forever, or at least will inspire some blogger to keep their memory alive via online alter ego...ahem.

6) Greyhounds are quiet (except for Cleo, when she wants something), have short hair, and do not shed as much as other breeds (which makes them a better breed for allergy-sufferers)...so clearly, they would make good Oval Office companions. ;)

All that being said, there are two things I should point out:

1) Greyhounds must either be fenced in or MUST MUST MUST be on a strong leash. A runaway greyhound is much faster than a mere human can catch, and they could wander miles before they stop running. Also, a runaway greyhound is at serious risk of being hit by a car or other terrible injuries.

2) Once you get one, it's really hard not to get more. :)

If you have any questions about this wonderful breed, please leave them here, and I'll be happy to answer them!

YouTube Discovery of the Week

2008-11-09T11:22:00.003-06:00

Another weekend comes to a close and another video demonstrating just how others waste their time...ahem...I mean, embrace their creativity. Stick with it 'til about the 1:30 mark.

It's also noted at the end of the video that this kid cannot play the drums or piano. But who needs music lessons when you have Adobe Premiere at your disposal?

Yes We Can...

2008-11-04T22:10:00.006-06:00

...and yes we did.

Happy Halloween, Everybody!

2008-10-31T11:46:00.003-05:00

Something peculiar is afoot...

2008-10-21T16:49:00.002-05:00

Email thestrangeriswatching@gmail.com to let them know just how much you'll miss the Dresden Dolls' Amanda Palmer.

I will say no more.

--maise

P.S. Oh, and if you choose to delve into the mystery, please tell us what you find in this thread...

Today's Juicy Internet Read...

2008-10-20T16:36:00.004-05:00

It's a dreary October day here in Chicago...the sky is dark gray, the red and gold leaves are starting to blow off the black tree branches, it's starting to get too chilly to comfortably walk the dogs...

In short, it would be a perfect day to stay at home and curl up under the covers with a good book. Except it's Monday, and I'm stuck in the office under soul-destroying fluorescent lights. Still, I take to the internet when I can to find a good afternoon read.

Today's Juicy Internet Read is Karen Schoemer's revised look at Nancy Spungen, who was best known for probably being stabbed to death by junkie boyfriend and Sex Pistol Sid Vicious (who OD'ed himself four months later). The tale of Sid and Nancy is one of those stories of drug-induced mutual destruction that is often mistaken for a sort of passionate rebellion fuelled by amour fou.

Still, youthful mutual destruction makes for a pretty good read, so I do recommend this article, which poses the question of whether Nancy Spungen was unfairly dismissed and vilified as a mere groupie, the cause of the Sex Pistols' and Sid's destruction. It's hard not to think of Courtney Love, who is often accused outright of murdering Kurt Cobain--such is the lack of lost love between her and Nirvana fans. It's also interesting that Courtney Love and Nancy Spungen share a remarkable physical resemblance.

Perhaps I just am not inherently very punk, or maybe it's because I was a mere babe in the '70s and am in the prime of my life in the Golden Age of Snark, but I typically have a hard time taking punk icons very seriously. Especially now, when they're in their 50s and 60s, sitting around in their black leather jackets, pining for the good ol' days of rampant urban squalor.

And there was a certain element of hypocrisy to the punk movement even in its prime, as Nancy Spungen realized: "But Nancy was too extreme even for a movement centered on extremeness, and she never gained the acceptance she craved; she was an outcast among outcasts, nicknamed 'Nauseating Nancy' behind her back. 'It was jealousy,' says Roberta Bayley, who worked the door at CBGB. 'There’s no more competitive thing than who can fuck these musicians. Maybe Pamela Des Barres tells the story of female solidarity, but there was a lot of backstabbing.' According to Polk, 'The other girls shunned her and were mean to her. And that made Nancy worse. She became vengeful. She kind of reacted to them putting her down by doing even worse things. The only people who didn’t shun her were the guys that were getting drugs from her.'"

And so this article attempts to remind punk fans of the vulnerable humanity behind the wasted life. The way that she "could be very, very nice," according to Legs McNeil. The way that she demonstrated her musical knowledge and committment to the genre in a live interview. The way she embodied the spirit of punk with her obnoxiousness, her aggressiveness, and her delight in pissing people off.

I don't feel that anyone need be overly sentimental on Nancy's behalf. Her addiction, her murder--all of these things are to be pitied or mourned, perhaps, but not romanticized. There was a certain alluring chaotic energy to be found in her relationship with Sid Vicious, but it can't be called love...or at least not some pure love that anyone should aspire to. (Amy Winehouse, please take note).

For more Sid 'n Nancy fun, check out their appearance on this interview, where they field live questions from callers. I think this is the clip Karen Schoemer is referring to in her article:

Countdown to Release: For Reals This Time?

2008-10-10T01:14:00.000-05:00

Seems that Axl is working to make good on the deal with Dr. Pepper signed earlier this year.

October 9, 2008 -- More than a decade after its conception, Guns N' Roses' "Chinese Democracy" will finally see the light of day before year's end, sources close to the situation confirm to Billboard. As first reported here, the set will be a Best Buy exclusive and will be available Sunday, Nov. 23, rather than the usual Tuesday.

Beyond enticing pre-Thanksgiving shoppers, the move is tied to the structure of Best Buy's sales week, which runs from Sunday to Saturday. As such, "Chinese Democracy" would not be eligible to chart on The Billboard 200 until the week of Dec. 1, according to Nielsen SoundScan.

I'm going to ignore the whole Best Buy tidbit for now and just say "I'll believe it when I see it."

But out of curiosity, did anyone listen to the nine tracks that leaked back in June? Thoughts? I may or may not have gotten my hands on them but it's only now I'm feeling interested enough to actually unpack and give 'em a spin.

YouTube Discovery of the Week

2008-10-06T21:29:00.013-05:00

Ancient Egyptian-themed death metal step aside; there's a new sound in town. Say hello to agriculturally inspired heavy metal.

Music class would have been a helluva lot more interesting had Old McDonald sounded like this when I was a kid. Can you just imagine Mrs. Larson, the second grade elementary school teacher, saying "Now children, sing with me...

Old McDonald had a farm.
E-I-E-I-OOOOOOOOO!
RAAAAAAAAWR!"

LIVE!

2008-10-02T19:56:00.008-05:00

Check it out! NIN is streaming LIVE from Buenos Aires, Argentina on 10musica.com like RIGHT NOW!

CLICK ME for streaming video.

CLICK ME for just audio.

Okay,well, the video is a little sketchy and the audio leaves much to be desired but if you click the "just audio" link it seems to be coming in great.

**EDIT**
Shows over folks but I did get a couple halfway decent screen grabs. I'm sure there will be video uploaded on YouTube by plenty of others who tuned in. I'll try to make sure to update as I find them so be sure to check back with us.

**EDIT 2.0**
So I've searched a bit for some decent quality video of this show and it does not appear to exist. I figured someone with the know how would have recorded the web broadcast but so far I've only found some shaky, in crowd cam footage. Still, if you're feeling up to it, you can see a few songs here.

Where The Hell Did You Get That?

2008-09-30T01:23:00.002-05:00

Okay, so this afternoon Maise and I had worked out an idea to throw together a hilarious photoshop of D:Angel, Angelcat, and Trent together on their hot air balloon ride that Angelman claims to have won from filling out the survey from the previous post. In our heads it would have been really funny (picture the three of them in this balloon) but tonight my hubby has trumped us.

Hubby is always the prankster and is pretty supportive when it comes to my NIN enthusiasm. Remember a few years ago when he mowed the downward spiral into our back lawn? Yeah, I thought that was cute. But I was not prepared when he came walking through the door tonight with this:

We are now the owners of a 24" x36" (61.0 x 91.4cm for our metric friends) oil portrait of Closer's Bondage Trent, otherwise know to the artist as "Trent. Ooh, baby".

Apparently this is what happens when hubby is left on his own and has time to kill between appointments in Iowa City. He tells me he found it in some consignment shop basement behind an assortment of beer lights and other discarded pictures. For $15 he said he couldn't resist a joke and laughed when it earned him a raised eyebrow from the blue-haired old lady working the register.

I laughed my ass off when I first saw it and have been giggling all night. Not that it isn't a pretty good rendering of dear Trent (much better than anything I could come up with) but what the fuck am I supposed to do with it now? Should I go total fangirl and hang it up with a candle shelf shrine below? Ironically enough it does go with the some of the colors in my recently redecorated "home office". Or should we hold some sort of Places Parallel contest in which this will be the prize? Or should I lug it along with Maise, Ro, and I to the next NIN show we attend, in hopes that we can get The Man to come out and autograph it and then return it to the artist, E.M., as a "Surprise! Guess where this has been?"

Hmm...decisions, decisions.

Would You Like To Take A Survey?

2008-09-23T22:59:00.002-05:00

Hello again all. So as our own D:Angel pointed out, an email from Trent has been making its rounds asking NIN fans for a little help via a survey. Apparently I wasn't on the guest list for said email, although, I did find a link to it late last night by other means. A recap of the contents:

Hello everyone.

I'd like to thank everyone for a very successful year so far in the world of Nine Inch Nails. I'm enjoying my couple of weeks off between legs of our Lights In The Sky tour and got to thinking... "wouldn't it be fun to send out a survey to everyone that's shown interest in NIN?" Well, that's not exactly how it went, but regardless - here it is. As we've moved from the familiar world of record labels and BS into the unknown world of doing everything yourself, we've realized it would benefit us and our ability to interact with you if we knew more about what you want, what you like, what you look like naked, etc.I know it's a pain in the ass but we'd truly appreciate it if you'd take a minute and help us out. As an incentive, everyone who completes the survey will be able to download a video of live performance from this most recent tour (and I know what's going through your little minds right now: "I'll just grab this off a torrent site and not have to fill out the survey!!!" and guess what? You will be able to do just that and BEAT THE SYSTEM!!!! NIN=pwn3d!!!)
BUT
What if we were to select some of those that DO complete the survey and provide them with something really cool? I'm not saying we'll ever get around to it, but if we did maybe something like signed stuff, flying someone to a show somewhere in the world, a magic amulet that makes you invisible, a date with Jeordie White (condoms supplied of course), you
know - something cool. See, you'd miss that opportunity AND be a cheater. Do the right thing - help us out. You'll feel better.

Thank you and I've had too much caffeine this morning,
Trent

Click here to take the survey

Seriously, how cute is [Caffeinated_Trent]?

As Maise mentioned, the survey is really looong. But being the good little fangirl I am, I diligently filled out each and every question. That isn't to say that I didn't have some issues with a few of the inquiries though.

1. Favorite OVERALL Nine Inch Nails song & Favorite LIVE Nine Inch Nails song.

Just one of each? What the hell, man? Favorite overall song was easy since I'm still head over heels for "Lights in the Sky" but picking one favorite live version is damned near impossible. "Burn," "Survivalism," "Mr. Self Destruct," and yes, even "Only" (for the light show as well as the song) have been fantastic the times I've been lucky enough to see them. I think a Top 5 in the live category would have better served those fans who have a hard time whittling this down to one.

2. Have you ever downloaded a Nine Inch Nails release from P2P or other non-retail download service? If so, which ones? (check all that apply)

The short answer to this is "well duh" but even after checking off the options I don't feel that I was able to answer completely honestly since the album "Purest Feeling" is not listed. Come on, Trent. You didn't think we'd forget about that little gem, did you? After all it was "Twist" that lent WearingTheseChains its moniker. And I suppose it wouldn't be relevant to what he's trying to do here but for the record, I also picked up the Option 30 and Exotic Birds albums via Demonoid.com a while back. What can I say? I am a collector. I was glad to see "Closure" listed but what? no "Broken" movie love? Granted, it didn't take me three days of torrenting to download it like "Closure" did but I still feel it's worth an honorable mention.

3. Favorite 3 TV shows? ONE PER BOX

I cringed at this question because, like Maise and her movie selections, I don't feel my choices are up to snuff. How does my watching bad reality TV affect your marketing technique, Trent? Are you going to be appearing on America's Next Top Model anytime soon? Jesus, I hope not but maybe, just maybe, you can be the anti-Tyra Banks and teach the models how to "scowl wit yo eyes".

4. This isn't really a complaint, per se, but I did feel a little naive, or maybe it's just out of touch with the youth these days, that I'd never heard of several of the sites listed for music services, upcoming concerts, or music retailers. I feel shamed for listing my meager sources for finding new music: the nin.com/forums, lollapalooza.com/forums, and for my guilty pleasure dance/pop trash, perezhilton.com. Yeah. I know. But I do plan on trying to redeem myself by checking out these other sites. I'm constantly looking for new music to listen to for the 6.5 minutes it takes me to get to work so if any readers out there have suggestions, please pass them along.

True to his word, upon completion of the novel-length survey, there are two download options for a video filmed at Red Rocks. One of these days I have to catch a show there. It just looks like such an awesome venue.

This video backs up "1,000,000" as my official choice in the Favorite Live Song category. Whether it's being played live or just cranked in the car, this song really gets me pumped up and rearing to go. I'm assuming Trent feels the same way judging from the foot stamping and the I-can't-contain-myself jog he does at about the 1:04 mark. But the synchronized rocking Robin and Justin do immediately after is slightly distracting. First the skipping and now this...do these guys do everything in tandem?

As for Trent's other suggestion that there might be some other cool token of appreciation for those who fill out this survey...well...I'm not going to hold my breath or update my vaccination record for the "date with Jeordie White" prize. While I admire Trent's good intentions, I have a feeling this will go the way of the Ghosts Film Festival. He is a busy guy after all so it's forgivable. Still, I would recommend taking 15 minutes out of your day to fill this out, if for no other reason than it would, in a trickle down method, help support the label-free cause Trent is rallying for.

And if you haven't checked out the new NIN.com then get on it. There are loads of new features including new ways to listen to NIN, forums, profiles, and chat rooms (where band members occasionally show up) . Oh my!

Why It's Impossible for Me to Hate Eddie Vedder...

2008-09-23T02:37:00.002-05:00

Jesus H, does everyone feel as frazzled as me? As usual, I've got the two jobs going, and I can't stop reading election coverage, and I've been devoting my time to some exciting creative projects in My Real Life, and I've been volunteering for greyhounds, Barack Obama, and overly expensive, but exciting, gourmet food festivals. But even with all that going on, I haven't forgotten you, Loyal and Long-Suffering Places Parallel readers.

So I thought I'd take a moment to explain why I can't hate Eddie Vedder, as much as I'd like to. Here are the reasons I wouldn't like him, if I had a choice:

1) Looks unwashed.
2) Mumbles when he sings slooooooooow dirges.
3) Tends to get preachy onstage.
4) My Worst Fucking Enemy--I mean my Fucking NEMESIS--in college LOVED him.

But here's the reason that it's impossible for me to hate him:

Any man who's a Cubs fan is all right by me.

Perhaps--just maybe--2008 can be our year. An African American president?* The Cubs winning the World Series for the first time in 100 years? Talk about the audacity of hope...Go Cubs Go!

*I'm going to overlook the fact that Barry is a South-Sider and a fan of that OTHER Chicago baseball franchise that shall go unnamed here.

Congratulations to Hot Lixx Hulahan!!!!

2008-08-25T10:48:00.003-05:00

The world may have been transfixed by the Olympics in Beijing this month, but in Oulu, Finland, a much more important international competition recently took place: The 2008 Air Guitar World Championships.

And who brought back the title to the good ol' US of A? Why, our very favorite Friend of a Friend, Craig "Hot Lixx Hulahan" Billmeier!

I don't know this guy, but I'm so proud! I'm sure our Dan must be ecstatic.

Let's all take a moment and celebrate Hot Lixx's triumph in pleather...the culmination of years of training, sacrifice, pain, and suffering (those windmills come with a price, my friend).

Hot Lixx Hulahan...a true American hero with a rocking haircut.

RIP LeRoi....

2008-08-20T11:28:00.003-05:00

I got laid to your music quite regularly in college and blame Dave, not you, for DMB's recent suckitude.

From the Dave Matthew Band website:

We are deeply saddened that LeRoi Moore, saxophonist and founding member of Dave Matthews Band, died unexpectedly Tuesday afternoon, August 19, 2008, at Hollywood Presbyterian Medical Center in Los Angeles from sudden complications stemming from his June ATV accident on his farm near Charlottesville, Virginia. LeRoi had recently returned to his Los Angeles home to begin an intensive physical rehabilitation program.